Page 13 | Home security cameras and MIL

AWildPlaceToStart · 2026-08-08T14:09:11+00:00

We have had security cameras fitted at our new home that we moved into 3 months ago. They record all around the outside of the house and parts of inside but just by external doors and our home offices. There are none in our family’s actual living space. My MIL has kicked up a huge fuss saying that she doesn’t want to be recorded and is refusing to come to our house unless we get rid old them or turn them off when she’s here which we won’t be doing. We have asked what exactly the problem is and she just says she doesn’t want to be recorded in our home but can’t or won’t really say why. Would you have a problem with the cameras? If so, what would be your concerns as I’m trying to understand what MILs issue is.

AddictedToDogs · 11/08/2026 07:46

Redintoothandclaw · 10/08/2026 22:04

So the audio wasn't helpful then? So agree to turn it off when MIL is there.

I'm not suggesting that there is absolutely zero chance of a burglar burgling the house in the daytime while people are in and the indoor cameras being helpful.in apprehending the burglar. I'm saying that the chance of that happening is very, very, very low, and the chance of that happening exactly on the occasion that the MIL is visiting is vanishingly minuscule. If it did happen, well, there's always OP's house insurance.

Set against that vanishingly minuscule chance the fact that the MIL, a very close and important relative, has concerns which most people on this thread would also have about the cameras and audio. It's perfectly reasonable for her to ask that they be turned off when she visits. Only someone with real mental health issues, who is a bit of a monster or who hates her MIL, would say no to this.

Now imagine these far, far, far more likely scenarios in OP's life:

OP gets into her car and drives into town. A reckless or drunk driver crashes into her and she is seriously injured.
OP is walking along a pavement. A reckless or drunk driver drives onto the payement and OP is killed.
OP goes for a walk. She trips over a stone or tree root and falls to the ground, bashing her head. Her life is saved, but she has brain damage.

Those incidents happen pretty frequently and are far more serious than a burglary where there isn't a good camera shot of the burglars. Yet OP leaves the house. She probably even drives, which is clearly a risky thing to do.

Why not get things into perspective and value the important things in life (a good relationship with your MIL is one of those).

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OPs MIL could also get some perspective. What does she think will happen being recorded arriving and leaving OPs house and being in a house where cameras are operating but not recording her other than at these times?

Awkwardisfunny · 11/08/2026 14:51

Woodfiresareamazing2 · 08/08/2026 18:02

If you read all OP'S posts, you would know that their home security cameras caught previous burglars on camera, they were identified and charged, and a lot of the stolen property was recovered.
The burglary took place while OP was at home.
Other burglars fled when they saw an internal camera in the room they were breaking into.
So that answers your "what are you hoping to achieve" question quite comprehensively.

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Fair enough. OP allegedly got the idiot burglars who haven't heard of masks.

Great, those idiots were caught. And the next ones who do wear masks?

But a full house with visitors too? No need to keep recording. And the chances of being burgled twice? Statistically? Move out at that point.

Woodfiresareamazing2 · 11/08/2026 16:27

So far they have been burgled twice ...

Ilovemyfam · 11/08/2026 19:17

AWildPlaceToStart · 08/08/2026 15:37

I know, but she would like to visit and we would like her to as well, so we are just trying to understand what the actual problem is beyond ‘I don’t want to be recorded in your home’. It’s interesting that some posters have said the same but haven’t really been able to say why. It’s not that MIL or anyone else has to, but we would like to be able to understand so maybe we can stop her being worried about it if possible.

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Show her where the cameras are. Remind her “go straight through to the sitting room” or similar. Make sure you are not receiving auto notifications while she is there! Maybe that will reassure her.

ConstantlyFuriosa · 12/08/2026 03:34

God, I hate this normalisation of constant surveillance.

Hello, 1984.

DeftGoldHedgehog · 12/08/2026 05:23

Candleflakes · 08/08/2026 15:14

I’d immediately be suspicious. I'm assuming she doesn’t have issues with CCTV in public places?

We have cameras in every room in our house (except bathrooms obviously), I wouldn’t be turning them off for anyone.

Just tell her you’ve turned them off, she won’t know any different.

Edited

In bedrooms? 😮

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 09:58

ConstantlyFuriosa · 12/08/2026 03:34

God, I hate this normalisation of constant surveillance.

Hello, 1984.

In Scotland you can be sent to prison (for up to 7 years) for "hate speech" against certain categories of people (eg transgender). The government were very clear that this covers conversations between family members in the home. I can imagine OP's teenage children accessing the recording of a conversation their parents had over dinner and taking it to the police... But maybe they're not in Scotland. There's definitely a thriller or crime book you could write on a family with this type of inside surveillance. Husband versus wife and children versus parents.

Candleflakes · 12/08/2026 13:39

DeftGoldHedgehog · 12/08/2026 05:23

In bedrooms? 😮

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Yes, every bedroom

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 14:41

pouletvous · 10/08/2026 15:26

Why do people have cameras inside?

someone i know has one in their kids (aged 9) bedroom

sooooo weird!

I think that could be categorised as abuse. When is she going to remove it?

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 14:44

For the women who have cameras in their bedrooms and in their children's bedrooms. Is it technically possible for your husband or partner to upload footage to the internet? I bet it is. No-one ever thinks that it will happen to them.

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 14:47

Nothavingagoodvalentinesday · 10/08/2026 03:37

The sense of being watched all the time is dreadful. Can’t you simply turn off the cameras while she’s with you?

OP won't even consider doing that. It's her way or the highway. Her MIL probably thinks her son has married someone with very serious issues.

XelaM · 12/08/2026 14:55

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 14:44

For the women who have cameras in their bedrooms and in their children's bedrooms. Is it technically possible for your husband or partner to upload footage to the internet? I bet it is. No-one ever thinks that it will happen to them.

Exactly. As soon as marriages turn sour you'll be surprised what the other hallves are capable of.

Original poster

AWildPlaceToStart · 12/08/2026 16:27

I haven’t read all the replies yet but wanted to update as I can see people are still posting.

MIL has relented. The main reason I posted was because we are having a party at the house this weekend for a birthday and she was going to miss it. After chatting to a few people, she agreed to come and look at exactly what the cameras record yesterday, which she had previously refused to but I think potentially missing a party that everyone else in the family is attending made her feel bad. She was ok when we showed her, so she has now decided she will come to the party and will hopefully visit us at other times too now she feels more comfortable.

OP posts:

fashionqueen0123 · 12/08/2026 17:39

Redintoothandclaw · 12/08/2026 14:41

I think that could be categorised as abuse. When is she going to remove it?

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It’s so creepy.

DeftGoldHedgehog · 12/08/2026 23:44

Cameras in bedrooms is all kinds of wrong.

ForDisplayPurposesOnly · 15/08/2026 09:36

AWildPlaceToStart · 12/08/2026 16:27

I haven’t read all the replies yet but wanted to update as I can see people are still posting.

MIL has relented. The main reason I posted was because we are having a party at the house this weekend for a birthday and she was going to miss it. After chatting to a few people, she agreed to come and look at exactly what the cameras record yesterday, which she had previously refused to but I think potentially missing a party that everyone else in the family is attending made her feel bad. She was ok when we showed her, so she has now decided she will come to the party and will hopefully visit us at other times too now she feels more comfortable.

Great update OP. I’m glad she has seen sense.

Enjoy your party. 🥳

LongTripHome · 15/08/2026 15:04

AWildPlaceToStart · 12/08/2026 16:27

I haven’t read all the replies yet but wanted to update as I can see people are still posting.

MIL has relented. The main reason I posted was because we are having a party at the house this weekend for a birthday and she was going to miss it. After chatting to a few people, she agreed to come and look at exactly what the cameras record yesterday, which she had previously refused to but I think potentially missing a party that everyone else in the family is attending made her feel bad. She was ok when we showed her, so she has now decided she will come to the party and will hopefully visit us at other times too now she feels more comfortable.

I’m pleased that she has had a change of heart OP and everyone enjoys the party.

Home security cameras and MIL

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