How can I deal with my adult daughter refusing to wear a seatbelt?

[IdaSpare]

Please help, I'm at the end of my tether, my 21 year old daughter who will not wear a seatbelt either driving or as a passenger. She was always brought up to wear it and everyone else in the family always wears one. I think it's a sensory thing as she has always been very difficult about changing clothes or dealing with zips and labels etc but if she is going to drive a car, she has to wear it. It's quite unusual for me to be in a car with her anymore but every time recently I have been, I've had to tell her to put it on. I know she goes straight back to not wearing one when I'm not there. I've resorted to threatening to call the police on her myself but short of taking her keys off her I don't know what to do. I'm hoping I can show her this and she can realise how reckless and stupid she's being. Please, if any of you have any pearls of wisdom to share about dealing with a stubborn, know it all daughter, I'd be so grateful.

Nope. Anyone over 14 is responsible for their own seatbelt use. Suggest you check YOUR facts.

Red Asphalt. It is American (and going back decades), but it still applies.
And all the injuries and deaths in it are real. No fake ones.

In my own experience, after being on this planet just over 60 years, I have personally known at least 2 people who have been decapitated in road accidents. It ENDED their lives. Christopher Lee, a lovely lad I went to school with, in our hometown, on his bike, when we were still teenagers I'm pretty sure; and Pete-Pete, my little cousin, at the other side of the world, c12 August 1988. The damage is real.

You don't go anywhere with her unless she buckles up and if you know she's driving on her own without one then you call the police. She'll hate you for it so I wouldn't be inclined to tell her thats your plan or continue to threaten her with this. Points and a fine is far better than a death/life changing injuries.....

Upper case letters and driving since 1983 still don’t make you right.

Over the age of 14 and they’re responsible for themselves.

I suggest you go and check your facts. Maybe brush up on the highway code at the same time, that’s also changed a lot.

When I was 17 a friend went through the windscreen of her dads car and smashed her face on the bonnet. (He was driving). She broke every bone in her face, was in hospital for months while everything was wired back into almost the same place, and when she came out no one recognised her.

No way would I drive anyone anywhere without a seatbelt on.

I'd call the Police, I think.

Sooner or later, unfortunately, she's likely to have an accident.

Be it small or large, her fault or not, it will result in her being more hurt than she would be with a belt on.

Time for her to grow up and stick to the law, like everyone else.

It’s illegal not to wear a seatbelt, £100 on the spot fine rising later if no payment. If she habitually drives without one sooner or later she will get caught.

How did she manage her lessons and test?

I use a seatbelt cover because being a short woman with a moley neck, male-centric "adjustable" seatbelts are perfectly designed to rub my neck sore. Not wearing them is not an option.

If it was my child, I'd regularly spam them with public information videos and not facilitate them driving.

Passengers aged 14 and over: The individual passengers are legally responsible for themselves. If they choose not to wear a seatbelt, they are personally liable for the offence. 1, 2, 3]

why oh why don’t people check facts before embarrassing themselves

A couple of options -
buy a seat belt gizmo that realign where the seat belt fits across the body (I bought some - they're basically a rectangle that folds in 3 with strong velcro. You wrap it round the seat belt near the clip and move it across your abdomen into position once you've clipped in.)

• Show her videos of crashes with people with no seat belts.
• Don't allow her to sit behind anyone in the car, she could kill them in a crash or better still refuse to drive until she buckles up.
• lose her car keys.

She might qualify for a medical exemption for sensory issues. She should speak to her GP. They can also advise on safe ways to adapt seatbelts to prevent issues.

Yet her sensory issues did not apply during her lessons and test?