How can I deal with my adult daughter refusing to wear a seatbelt?

[IdaSpare]

Please help, I'm at the end of my tether, my 21 year old daughter who will not wear a seatbelt either driving or as a passenger. She was always brought up to wear it and everyone else in the family always wears one. I think it's a sensory thing as she has always been very difficult about changing clothes or dealing with zips and labels etc but if she is going to drive a car, she has to wear it. It's quite unusual for me to be in a car with her anymore but every time recently I have been, I've had to tell her to put it on. I know she goes straight back to not wearing one when I'm not there. I've resorted to threatening to call the police on her myself but short of taking her keys off her I don't know what to do. I'm hoping I can show her this and she can realise how reckless and stupid she's being. Please, if any of you have any pearls of wisdom to share about dealing with a stubborn, know it all daughter, I'd be so grateful.

Tell her that my son, a paramedic, has had to go searching down the motorways after an RTC for the corpses of those not wearing seatbelts. They can travel 100 metres.
And also had to confirm death of corpses through windscreens when the collision is more urban.
It’s no joke.

Yup. And chances are extremely high that she would have had no or minor injuries if she'd been wearing a seatbelt.

Princess Diana would have survived if she'd been wearing a seatbelt. Her side of the car wasn't crushed or anything. But her massive internal injuries were caused by her being flung against the seat in front.

OP, your daughter needs to learn some physics fundamentals. Even at a low speed, a body experiencing a rapid deceleration can expect some level of injury. And it gets worse and worse with more speed. The "Julie Knew Her Killer" ad is horrible but very realistic.

I think your daughter is one of the biggest idiots I've ever heard of for not wearing a seatbelt. I wouldn't give up trying to educate her, if I were you. And I'd call the police on her next time she pulls away in her car not wearing a seatbelt. Sounds like she could do with a brush with the police. You could also ask them for advice. They might even go round and talk to her.

Why the face? It's true. Sudden braking is dangerous for all around you and can cause accidents. You only brake suddenly or do an emergency stop for a very good reason. Yes, I know you're going to say that squirrels are a good reason, but they're not. Not when you might cause a deadly accident.

Jesus fucking Christ. That's absolutely horrific.

And so sad that it was totally preventable by wearing a seatbelt.

I did the same with my DC and they haven’t forgotten it.

For the OP I’d suggest not reminding her DD to put her seatbelt on and do the same.

Agree. And it's not just her own life she's endangering, it's other people's, too.

A good example. The only person wearing a seatbelt in that car was also the only person to survive.

With the amount of cameras around. The police around me are asking people to send in dash cam footage of no seat belts or phone usage.
I could never do it even if I wanted too because the bloody beeping my car does if you haven’t put the thing on! I keep putting heavy shopping bags on my passenger seat. Probably safer on the floor anyway.

The driver is responsible for ensuring all passengers wear (use) a seatbelt. The driver is responsible for making sure there are not too many passengers for seat belts. If the police collar anyone in this regard it will be the driver. Points on licence, fines, insurance HIKES, barring from driving! If she won't wear a seat belt when you are driving, politely ask her to vacate the car and refuse fire up the engine. If it is imperative you complete the journey, explain to her in stark terms the position she is putting you in. We don't make the laws but they are there for a reason and they apply to EVERYone. I wish you well. Just get on with life without letting her travel in or drive the car. Let her know you want to reverse the policy but she has to reverse hers too.

That’s the exact video I thought of the minute I read the opening post. It’s shocking.

OP, your DD sounds too immature to drive. She needs a sharp shock. I’d report her to the police. Hopefully they’d also have some additional information to tell her re not wearing a seatbelt, which will ensure she always puts it on.

I'm wondering how she puts up with the beeping noise and the red flashing on the dashboard?

I was going to say this - the ads from the 90s were pretty traumatising and should work

She might find that her insurance is invalid if she's not wearing a seat belt, the personal injury part certainly will be

Id call the police. £60 fine might help her reevaluate

Anyone over 14 is responsible for themselves, you’ve got that totally wrong about the driver being responsible!

Also the issue is the DD driving her own car, not necessarily as passenger in her mother’s car.

Could she try a seatbelt cover to reduce the sensory issues?

If you're in the UK, it's a legal requirement to wear a seat belt whilst driving or as a passenger.

When I was in school, someone came in to show us a video of what happens when anyone doesn’t wear a seatbelt in the car, driver or passenger, how even if everyone else is wearing one but one person isn’t, that one person could be the cause of the death of everyone else as they will get thrashed around, how there are people hired to scrape off the faces of humans from the asphalt on the floors. The talk made me always wear my seatbelt and to never be in any car where someone isn’t wearing a seatbelt because I don’t want to allow someone else’s recklessness to be the cause of my death

Ridiculous. If you are the driver and your daughter refuses to wear a seat belt, you will also be fined.Airbags shoot out, onpact around 100mph, without a seat belt you can snap your neck, and have serious if not fatal head injuries. I would ring 101, giving the police her name, address and registration plate of the car she drives.The police will then look out for her, it seems this is the only way to teach her.How did she pass her test without wearing a seat belt?? Therefore she can wear a seat belt, just thinks she will get away with not wearing one, because she thinks bad thinks couldn't possibly happen to her. She needs to see the aftermath when people haven't worn one, it often ends in death, lt isn't nice to see, take it from me.

If she can’t deal with the sensory issue of a seatbelt she can’t drive a car. It’s a requirement. You find a way to deal with it, soft covering for example, or you take the bus. Ask a close friend to report her to the police so you can say it wasn’t you. It was someone meaning well and very worried. 21 is old enough to deal with the consequences of actions. Very hard for you.

Ridiculous. If you are the driver and your daughter refuses to wear a seat belt, you will also be fined.

Again, incorrect.

Get the book "Unnatural causes" by Richard Shepherd who was the home office pathologist who did the post mortem for Princess Diana (amongst many other cases) and read that particular chapter- she wouldn't have died if she been wearing a seat belt.

^Quite. Your DD needs to take note of this. Diana died because she wasn’t wearing a seatbelt.

I guess a 21-year-old can easily simply think it won’t happen to her. But a fatal car accident can happen to anyone.

AS A DRIVER you are responsible for passengers in your vehicle wearing a seat belt. IT'S THE LAW. Been driving, in this country, since 1983. GO CHECK YOUR FACTS.

Get a picture of someone who has been either badly injured or decapitated and show it to her. Tell her if she thinks wearing a seatbelt is uncomfortable how about a full body cast.