What is the most not ok thing someone has said to you recently?

[BeMintFatball]

Went to see my 91 year old great aunt who I have not seen in person for several years.

Within minutes of arriving aunt told me I look like I have lost weight. I have but only about half a stone not intentionally but also it’s not a drastic amount.

I said I may have lost a bit biting my tongue not to say stress will do that.

Aunt followed up with I thought you had been on the mounjaro jabs. I mean wow! The older generation really shoot from the hip.

My mother, commenting on my weight loss …. Well let’s face it, you needed to lose weight. I had cancer/treatment. Better alive for my kids and fat for a bit imo.

“OH, Unnameable Orange Bastard would totally love you and your kids.” (We are all blonde.)
The only thing I could think of saying was “Yeah, until we open our mouths…” ew….. ew..ew..EEEEEEEEEUUUUUUUWWWWWUH!!!

Well done, you must feel amazing. She’s just jealous!

Every time someone tells me they are voting reform is definitely not ok. I actually see them as worthless.

Yep. Dd is in her 30s. It was all light hearted really, my grandmother had no filter. Dd wasn’t offended at all but I know some people would be.

Me too, that’s so horrible and deranged and says everything you ever want to know about the idiot who said it.

an old family friend took my hand and said sadly, you’re too thin you know, it’s such a shame because you used to be so beautiful.(this was at my father’s funeral and i had also recently finished cancer treatment)

After having worked in care and cared for my mum until she died at 93, my then 96 year old father told me that I just didn’t understand old people. At that point I was driving 100 miles up and down the motorway every other week, running all his financial affairs, had bought his retirement flat, arranged his cleaner/carer, and spoke with him every single day - even from Central Asia when I was on holiday.

I just remembered another one. I had taken my mother out to a cafe for lunch. I was in the queue to order, and I heard her shout from across the room… “Fraaaaaahnces! Can you see the size of that lesbian?!?” I put my face in my hands and wanted to die. Then I hear the woman behind me say, “I take it she’s referring to me?” I had to apologise and let her know that after a lifetime of anorexia and chain-smoking instead of eating, my mother’s lung cancer had gone to her brain. She was still obsessed with other women’s size and her filter had gone. She was lovely. Her mum had dementia and she knew what I was dealing with that day.

You look well or you look better when I haven't been ill. Find this quite condescending.

My MIL not known to have any filter said to my niece- oh you’ve lost so much weight. She kept repeating it as it was not getting any response. She knew fine well the niece had an eating disorder and was really struggling. I had a quiet word but she continued to call her “ miss slinky”
Like MIL became obsessed.

It’s not a generation thing. It’s an individual person thing. Don’t be ageist.

How rude of you. The OP has revealed something quite traumatic and you called her ageist. She is correct, that generation (my parents) are more likely to say this sort of thing. We have learnt to be more tactful. You should try it!

I know. What a weird response to someone who'd suffered like that.

I had that for years until my thyroid got lazy. I’d rather be where you are again.

Tame compared to many here but when asked by an acquaintance what my dad did for a living (manual low skilled job), saying ‘that’s nothing to be ashamed of’. Said I wasn’t in the least ashamed

I was told I look like a 66 year old yesterday. I'm in my late 50s. Cheers for that.

Last week I was just leaving the local hospital (only popped in for a routine blood test) and was approached by a man raising money for a charity. He looked me up and down and said 'So...are you tattooed ALL over?' urgh. Unfortunately this happens quite a lot and it's always men who ask. I usually ask why they want to know. (And the actual answer is no, I'm not tattooed ALL over 🙄)

I went to have a consultation for advice about getting fillers to reduce my 'laugh lines' Was told I was too far gone & would need a mini face lift! say it how it is why don't you.