Niche Mumsnet things

[manicpixieschemegirl]

I don’t mean commando crawling behind the sofa when the door bell rings or one chicken seeing an entire family through the winter. Slightly more obscure things you see crop up quite often that you’ve never heard anyone say or do in real life. I’ll go first -

OP looking for a miracle product or cut for their frizzy, untameable hair but point blank refusing to blow dry or style it in any way shape or form.

People falling over themselves to call an OP unreasonable for being miffed that the guy she’s dating hasn’t been in contact for a few days. Apparently a text exchange every 3-5 business days is more than enough and OP is clearly needy and deeply insecure.

That's roughly what we leave it at. 13.5 C to 15 C in the day.

At night, I whack it down to 10 C. It very rarely comes on. Unless it drops below 10 C below zero or lower. Then it needs to be on for half an hour IMO.

Shaking and crying after any slightly negative interaction with someone

Yes, I do find this very odd. Especially as, in the vast majority of cases, it's the man who earns more.

awaits the flurry of posters claiming they earn 2-3 times what their DH earns! 🙄

Same, once i am under a duvet in bed i don't need the heating on.

You do have to wonder how they get through life… I’d add “being furious” for equally minor aggravations.

Being completely stuffed after a ‘massive salad’

Yeah, unless it's 12-15 C below zero outside, I would be really uncomfortable with the heating on overnight. But as I say, if it gets VERY cold, well below zero, then I don't mind it coming on for half an hour a couple of times through the night. (After it's been on half an hour the house stays warm/warmish for about 4-5 hours.)

Sorry I wasn’t clear I meant that moving with all these layers on should be really tricky. From their description people should look like a gigantic snowballs.

Hobbies. Never in real life does anyone keep their relevant to the question hobby a secret in case it’s outing. Just say it’s golf or cycling and we can judge accordingly. If it’s morris dancing we’d also like to know. It really isn’t outing.

I have relations like this.

My main thought as they complain through life is ‘Sod off ‘

The reality is they tend to be horrible selfish people who feel personally attacked when the wind blows.

The cringey language always gets me. People on Mumsnet are always whacking something in the oven, or bunging it under the grill or chucking things in the slow cooker. They also can never just wear clothes, they rock them. I don’t know a single person who speaks like this.

The arguments in the carparks. I've never seen an argument in a carpark.

Routine postings about how 'AIBU to park in X spot but person X came up and started ranting at me b/c ...'

Also, all the grim neighbours with 5 cars who fill up all the extra parking and potentially block in the OP.

In summertime it's the neighbours with a smoky grill meaning that the OP has to close all their windows and now everyone is boiling ...

Ah I see , like the giant marshmallow man. Maybe they roll...

The idea that there is absolutely no point trying to make friends with other mums at baby group / nursery / school / swimming lessons or whatever because the only thing you have in common is children the same age. Well IMO that’s a massive thing to have in common and all my friendships must have started with just one thing in common at some point - school, they were the same age as me, uni they lived in the same halls as me, work, we worked at the same place. Mums of DCs the same age as mine are a massive part of my life even though the DCs are all adults now and we mainly all talk about elderly parents instead.

The sadly all-too-frequent threads with the title: "Am I being too sensitive?".

No. No love, you're not. In exactly the same way that every other person who starts a thread called this, you are not being too sensitive.

I don't think that's particularly niche. Getting a driving licence and being insured in a car takes a lot of time and money, which it's not unusual not to have as a working adult.

Perhaps less usual for MNers if they skew MC and got lessons when they were young.

And the same ones who earlier asked what sort of chores their 10yo should be doing because they want to get them started.

See also "I hate confrontation" so they made a problem worse by ignoring, lying or pretending to agree something then getting resentful about it.

Being invited to a wedding evening do means the couple/the bride hate you and are making it clear you are third-tier friends at best.

Having friends who randomly ask to borrow 5 grand

I find the attitude on here to having friends absolutely bizarre.

Not expecting a friend to reply to a message within a reasonable time. Everyone on Mumsnet seems to think you have to leave 1-2 months for a reply as everyone is ‘busy’ and can’t possibly reply to a text

the bit that seems oddly MN thing is for then adults to decide to live in the middle of nowhere- it’s insane to me that as an adult who didn’t drive you’d choose to buy/rent a property in the middle of nowhere, rather than in a town/city with access to public transport.

Yet on MN this seems to be a regular thing.

This is probably why I don’t know any, they’re all stuck in the outback waiting for the one bus a week

Or being “humiliated” or “mortified” by minor events.