Family member sells gifts on Vinted - what would you do?

[LeChiffre26]

My SIL sells gifts we have given her and her family on Vinted. We take time and thought with gifts. It's disheartening to see this. She does not need the money! What would you do? Let her know you have seen them? Just stop giving gifts? Just give her any old thing?

I agree.

Give hyper personalized gifts. Like a mug with family photos on.

I think thoughtful gifts are ideal and can be the best ones - IF you manage to hit the nail on the head and that's often the issue unfortunately. I had to spend £30-40 after Christmas to buy things that I didn't get off my (very short) list in favour of "thoughtful/fun" presents that I can't/won't use. I have no problem with vouchers/money as my birthday is in January. I can never think of enough things for both and I really enjoy spending them later in the year when things catch my eye.

I can appreciate the thought someone might have put into a gift, but my gratitude will probably a bit limited if it's at the expense of things I asked for and actually wanted/needed.

Stop giving gifts. I really don't understand why people feel the need to buy presents for the world & his wife. Present I get are for my kids & SIL & they are the dull sort - gift cards/socks - I only have a limited knowledge of their interests so it's better if they choose the exact thing for themselves. Oh, and a bottle of their favourite booze. 🙂

Place bids and add snarky notes

gift food, can't sell it

Order one and see what happens....

maybe it’s time to knock the gift giving on the head with SIL (and any other adults). Me and my sibling have stopped gifts and OH an his siblings do a secret santa between themselves -so they can get one decent gift.

My MIL, bless her, always tries to choose something she thinks i would like, but it’s always off the mark and now i’m stuck with gifts i won’t use, so may as well sell it on.

id much rather someone keep their money and and i’ll do the same!!!

She's quite quick off the mark! My mother used to be worrying about whether people wore/used/put on the shelf gifts she had given - she was quite put out if someone didn't like what she had sent them. I learnt not to invest in that way. I buy a gift I think would be appreciated but from then on in, I don't bother about it. It's self protective I guess. If they chose to put it on Vinted, so be it. Next year just send vouchers.

How do you know she sells the gifts on Vinted?

This

I have had to put loads of unwanted gifts on Vinted this year. It’s so annoying, a waste of their money, my time, and the only people who benefit are the company who sold the item in the first place, and the person on Vinted getting the bargain.

Just ask me what I flipping want, for goodness’ sake! Or better yet, let’s agree to stop exchanging presents for the sake of it.

give money to a charity on her behalf.

Id be very tempted to buy one from her and offer to collect it in person.
Id love to be a fly on the wall when the penny drops with her about who the purchaser is 😉

haven't read the whole conversation but i have read all the op posts if it was someone in my life i would think she needed the money and either drop it into conversation in the sense of "i saw an article/post/clip talking about being mindful of family/friends struggling for money secretly and i hate the thought of anyone in my life being in that position and not coming to me" or give amazon/lovetoshop/one4all vouchers or for a shop/website you know she uses.

Stop giving her gifts, obviously there not wanted or appreciated, just tell her you won’t be exchanging gifts in the future.

What’s this insanity with buying multiple presents for adults? A load of useless tat. Good for her getting some money out of it, I just regift 10th loccitane shower gel or lotion otherwise it’s wasted in my drawer.

Her page came up one time when I was browsing 🤷‍♀️

I think this is fine for her to do tbh. Every year at Xmas I get gifted things I won't use and I have zero room for them at home and I absolutely hate clutter.

If its of no use to her but in good condition and would be of use to someone then I see no harm in her selling it on so she can use the money for something else. I think you lose control of what happens next when you gift someone something - you can't dictate that they keep or use it and not everyone has the time to drive things to the charity shop or maybe wants to use the money for something else.

I'd just get her a voucher next time for somewhere you know she shops regularly rather than trying to guess what she'd like. That way you know it will go to use. Absolutely no reason to "call her out" and make a drama of it.

Also I wouldn't be suggesting no more presents with her if you're still giving to everyone else, you'll be making a distinction and it'll look petty.

Out of curiosity what do you do when you receive gifts you don't like/ can't use?

In the nicest way possible, just because you think the gifts are nice doesn’t mean anyone wants them. The best thing you can do is actually ask people what they would like or just stop exchanging gifts. I don’t understand why people think this is rude.

I would much rather someone sell something I’ve bought and use the money to buy something they actually want, than to chuck it in the bin.

It sounds as if you have bought them all a big gift they love, and then added junk to pad it out which is what she is selling. Don’t buy the junk in future.

Next year give her things you've brought from vinted. She can then pop them back on there.

On the off chance you're my relative.... It's the small stuff that is the issue. Don't feel you have to spend to to a certain limit, or make the value of the bigger gift up to a predetermined value. It's tatt for the sake of tatt, and you're spending money you don't need to. It's not stuff I need or want, and I've hinted at vouchers for years. You buying me stuff that you think I'd like just shows how little you know me. You could buy me a book for a fiver and I'd be happy. Please stop with the "stuff".

My sister in law used to take everything I bought her and her family back to whatever shop it came from, often asking me for the receipts. Every single year. In the end I just gave them an M&S or John Lewis voucher. Very rich but utter cheapskates.

Buy one of the items. And see what she says. If anything. Even if she doesnt say anything it might make her squirm..