I had a total Meltdown at my child's Christmas show last night

[thetallfairy]

Ahhhhh gosh

What is my life

I had been n the go all week

Sleep deprived

Single parent
Working 12-14 hours a day

It all so much for me last night

All on my own trying to help the kids
No one else to back me up

Kids would not come home with me when the show was over

Stepped into the corner of the hall and was in floods of tears

No one there to help

Friends from school sitting there with husbands and their parents they don't care

My parents dead
Sibling dead

Just got so much last night and we all left with me crying my eyes out it

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

Oh I’m so sorry and so sorry that no one checked in on you. This is such a difficult and overwhelming time of year for everybody, but when you’re coping with everything you have described it must be a nightmare.
Have you got a bit of time to rest over the Christmas break?
Sending you a huge hug 💐

What are you doing for yourself today?

Also, how old are you children? Are they old enough for some consequences?

Thank you I'm now working from home all of Xmas

Off Xmas day !!!

It's sucks really

I pay for everything

I do everything

My brain has had enough

My kids are 3 and 7

They are picking up on my anxiety

Plus I was away for a few days for work so they are out of kilter too

They were over tired and had too many treats with their friends

I prob should have done a better job

My brain can't work right now m

I'm know lots of mums out there in my shoes
It was my final straw and there were so many tears

My god !!!!

Some of the teachers were like wtaf

Oh love, it’s hard, it’s all on you and you’ve come to the end of your rope. It’s totally understandable.
Is there anything you can do to help make this easier for yourself, such as taking extra annual leave? Would your children go for a pyjamas day at home with some
movies just for some quiet time. Remember lots of early nights, get outside and eat well. Not a magic wand but it will help a bit.
Also, if it helps, just keep talking on here.

Also, don’t worry about what the teachers think - they will have seen it all and worse before

Thank you so much

The teachers know we fled d v

Not much help really but hope they don't judge us

Some of them there def judge I know that for sure but fck them
Why should they?!!

Yes some lovely pJ days here
Lots of winter walks

Low key
Will be fine

Just got so much last night

I'm so fcking over all this pressure

I don’t think people didn’t come to help because they didn’t care. It’s more likely they thought you wanted to sort it yourself. Fwiw I really admire you for bringing your DCs up on your own. It’s a bloody hard job.

sending more hugs

Well so true

I would be the first to help

Some people just felt awkward
Some were just enjoying the show in more ways than one

So hmmm

Got to pull myself up today

Thanks all

Will pick myself up

Just wallowing in misery today

Aw you poor thing. You are doing a brilliant job, very much doubt people are judging you. Sounds like it is mainly you judging yourself. Try to get some break over christmas and go easy on yourself.

Now I'm wondering how can I get out of all the other whole school events I'm so ashamed

Poor kids too bet they wish they were part of the other normal families

I agree with PP about not helping because they didn’t care. I once walked past a mum of a little girl with additional needs crying in her car after drop off because I didn’t know whether she wanted comfort or not. I kick myself for it all the time and wish I had just tapped on the window and offered her a hug. I can guarantee people will be thinking of you today with compassion and berating themselves for not finding the words to offer comfort.
Your chilled plans sound perfect. Christmas doesn’t have to be this whole song and dance and you’re teaching your DC on what it’s all about - spending time together and love. I agree the pressure is unreal - I’ve stopped asking other mums about their plans - I could never keep up.
You're doing better than you think x

Thank you so much

I can't keep up with it all

They all have Xmas day big celebrations

Then grandparents cousins all over Xmas

We have nothing really

But keep it simple
Calm down a bit so they don't pick up on my horrendous state and start afresh 2026

Bloody hell. I can’t believe no one asked you if you needed anything. If I saw someone in floods of tears on their own, regardless of where I was, I’d ask if I could do anything. Get them a tissue, drink of water, seat, hand hold?

I’m so sorry you’re struggling OP. It sounds like you’re working a lot too with those hours and WFH over Christmas…do you get any time off normally?

Sending hugs.xx

You're giving them a more normal life than before, you've done an amazing thing getting them away from DV. When they're older, they'll understand. I wish you and your family a peaceful Christmas and I hope you get some time to look after yourself, you deserve it.

Thank you

I really don't
I tend to work mostly from home all week

And you know what

Today I hoped some friends would text to check in

Nothing !!!!

So sod them

I'm really over their cold nature at this point

Do not be ashamed! You are incredibly brave. You're a warrior to have successfully removed yourself and your children to safety and you're doing brilliantly. You're allowed to feel overwhelmed. I'm sorry that nobody asked if they could help you in the moment. Sending hugs.

@Failedcrunchymum lovely thing to say

I work my socks off

High pressure job

Planning on quitting next year

And goi going to try to do one day a week in something much better

Oh OP, I'm so sorry, this IS a lot. Allow yourself to wallow as much as you need to. You might feel better afterwards. Drink a cup of tea in peace if you can.

I'm sorry op, that sounds so shit and you are completely understandably at the end of your tether. For what it's worth, I have had a meltdown at several school events in the past - schools must see it plenty so don't feel like you've done something wrong or odd.

I think your plan for a quiet chilled Christmas sounds absolutely lush. Let you and your kids recharge and refresh for the new year. You sound like a wonderful mum - the reason you are feeling so overwhelmed right now is that you care and are a conscientious person trying to do too much, plus you have fled DV which is something most of us can't even imagine being strong enough to do.

You can do this op, just be gentle on yourself and know that your kids will love watching Christmas movies and lovely winter walks with their mum, that's all they really need. Merry Christmas and I hope next year is easier for you.

Thank you

My social anxiety has been pretty bad

They were all with their friends I spent a lot of the evening hiding in the toilet

Imagine

Fear of being judged and not feeling good enough

So now I think you must give yourself a shake. It is absolutely not anyone’s business what you did and your best action is to continue as though it never happened (I mean, to outsiders). Remember the penguins from the movie Madagascar? “Smile and wave, boys - smile and wave!”. If you set that tone, parents and teachers will follow. As for dealing with it all on your own - enormous hugs xxx