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What's the worst thing you've heard in a wedding speech?

324 replies

Jubblybub · 21/09/2025 21:45

Was reading the thread about the best man's speech upsetting people and it got me thinking of some of the awful wedding speeches Ive had to listen to.

My BIL's best man at his wedding to my sister was awful, he made anti-semitic and homophobic comments in his speech (my sister's godfather is Jewish and gay and there were a number of gay and Jewish guests), made sexual remarks about my sister and had a really weird part of his speech that he had pre-recorded for everyone to watch. I won't go into specifics because it would be very outing but that section alone was 20 minutes long. The whole speech was excruciating and had me seriously wondering why my BIL has a friend like this (BIL could not be more different) never mind why he would have wanted this one as his best man.

At another wedding I went to, the father of the bride actually said at the beginning of his speech, "the bridesmaids and flower girls are looking beautiful, I hope there's no pedos here..." He then went on to talk about the stag do in great detail, including a strip club visit and how he had never had the experience of being in a nightclub with bottles of Grey Goose on their private table being accosted by beautiful, half-naked women until he met the groom and this was just one of the reasons why he was so happy to welcome him into the family. At the same wedding the groom's speech included broken down costings of the entire wedding, "thank you to mum and dad for paying £5k for our photographer, thanks to gran for bride's 10k wedding dress, thanks to parents in law for spending £xk on the catering" which was really bizarre.

Any other stories of wild things said in wedding speeches?

OP posts:
CrickityCrickets · 21/09/2025 22:01

A friend's best men were SO drunk that they couldn't really deliver their speech, swore a lot and then dissolved into giggles. I was so embarrassed for her :(

aold · 21/09/2025 22:01

“I hope this one works out” from the step dad
(marriage number 3 and bride was under 30)

idlieforyou · 21/09/2025 22:14

I was at a wedding once where the brides father’s speech was all about him.

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Youraveragelass · 21/09/2025 22:20

Attended a wedding where the father of the groom made some comment about the bride along the lines of “try before you buy” 😂

CarefulN0w · 21/09/2025 22:21

Not remotely funny for DH & his siblings, but FIL deciding to do the father of the bride speech at his step-daughter’s wedding was quite the event. Especially when her actual father was there as a guest and FIL referred to said bride as his daughter.

PersistentRain · 21/09/2025 22:23

my friends from uni got married, none of them had ever been to a wedding so had no idea of what it was meant to be like. Best Man, 23 year old pissed man, therefore decided he could just wing it and rambled on for 45 minutes with zero point.
Then followed by speeches by the bride, groom and both fathers. Fuck it was boring and we didn’t eat until after.

TranceNation · 21/09/2025 22:23

Fortunately never been present for a cringey speech but have certainly seen videos seen some cringey one of them on social media.

JDM625 · 21/09/2025 22:25

More cringe than horrendous:

-One best man talked on and on about old times with the groom, nights out pissed up and hints that there were either lots of woman in his past and/or possibly prostitutes!
-Another, when I was much younger, the best man asked all women in the crowd to hand back house keys to the grooms house. Multiple, single, young women got up and handed back keys. 😕

CheeseWisely · 21/09/2025 22:26

My Father at my half-brother’s wedding telling stories about all the things he’d done for his Son because ‘that’s what you do for your kids’ while I was squeezing my plus-ones hand blue under the table because that same doting parent walked out on me without looking back when I was 3 months old. Absolute raging twat.

CheeseWisely · 21/09/2025 22:26

JDM625 · 21/09/2025 22:25

More cringe than horrendous:

-One best man talked on and on about old times with the groom, nights out pissed up and hints that there were either lots of woman in his past and/or possibly prostitutes!
-Another, when I was much younger, the best man asked all women in the crowd to hand back house keys to the grooms house. Multiple, single, young women got up and handed back keys. 😕

That had to be a set-up for the laughs surely? Not that it’s particularly funny..

Mafstonight · 21/09/2025 22:29

About the brides STIs

JDM625 · 21/09/2025 22:30

CheeseWisely · 21/09/2025 22:26

That had to be a set-up for the laughs surely? Not that it’s particularly funny..

Of course it was set up for 'laughs'! They weren't really woman who had his door key! 🙄

It didn't make it less cringey and unnecessary though. I'm sure the bride found it absolutely hilarious!

SandyY2K · 21/09/2025 22:35

A wedding I attended and the Groom thanked his mum for her love, support, doing a great job raising him to be the man he became etc... and said to his dad "Thank you for paying the mortgage"

It was pindrop silence and people dl still talk about it 20 years later.

autienotnaughty · 21/09/2025 22:35

JDM625 · 21/09/2025 22:30

Of course it was set up for 'laughs'! They weren't really woman who had his door key! 🙄

It didn't make it less cringey and unnecessary though. I'm sure the bride found it absolutely hilarious!

I went to a wedding with a similar joke about the key to the grooms chastity belt and again several women and his best mate?!! Got up and returned keys

IWasScaredToBeHeld · 21/09/2025 22:43

My dad, at his brothers second wedding.

“this wedding has been so emotional, even the cake is in tiers”. Cue everyone else groaning while he dissolved into floods of hysterical laughter and couldn’t finish the rest of his speech!

Snipples · 21/09/2025 22:47

Our best man was going to do the key thing but thankfully my maid of honor heard about it and stopped it. She couldn’t unfortunately stop him from telling everyone about the groom getting wasted and pissing on the best man’s doorstep years earlier - I thought that was horrible to do to DH on his wedding day. Best man also made a joke about us going on honeymoon to wales as groom allegedly said “he was going to Bang Her (Bangor) for a week” - big Irish wedding (best man was English) NOT the done thing here.

special prize goes to my FIL who said “bride is a strong woman, but sometimes strong people fall down” and we (as in all of grooms family) will be here for you when this goes wrong.

I couldn’t give them the wedding video as my face is a picture in the speeches

bonnemaman1990 · 21/09/2025 22:56

I once went to a wedding where the two very drunk best men incoherently rambled for way too long. Couldn’t hear a word. They then proceeded to bring out a life sized blow up doll from the stag night. The brides father was absolutely livid and stood up and demanded they sit down immediately. Cue awkward stunned silence

EBearhug · 21/09/2025 22:58

The best man told a long and unnecessarily detailed account of how the groom had once suffered from really bad diarrhoea. Really great subject at a posh meal...

AffIt · 21/09/2025 22:58

Two stand out - one where the father of the bride essentially spent 45 mins banging on about the talents and virtues of the bride's SISTER and didn't mention the bride once, apart from her name at the beginning of the speech. It was utterly mortifying - the sister looked horribly embarrassed, the bride was clearly fighting back tears and the whole room was like 'WTF?'.

The second was the wedding of a friend who married a woman from a very, VERY wealthy family - Daddy had paid for everything and dictated the guest list, so the room was stuffed with his equally wealthy business cronies and the B&G had only been allowed to invite about 20 people between them. The FotB speech was an exercise in self-congratulation and it was really awful.

However, I have been to A LOT of weddings over the years and the vast majority have been brilliant, so these stand out in isolation!

Foundationns · 21/09/2025 23:03

CheeseWisely · 21/09/2025 22:26

That had to be a set-up for the laughs surely? Not that it’s particularly funny..

It must have been a setup. Stupid and disrespectful joke.

Soonenough · 21/09/2025 23:03

Went to one where the father of the groom was almost incoherently drunk and made a rambling speech directed at his golfing buddies with loads of in jokes. Embarrassing. And boring.

TeenLifeMum · 21/09/2025 23:04

Bride’s dad “well er erm, So, Emma got married…….. so I guess that’s good. Not really sure what else to say.” Sits back down. No social anxiety just his usual low effort parenting. Even for him that was shit. Best man then spoke about a load of times him and groom got shit faced and didn’t mention the bride once. Groom’s speech was just a list of thank you’s and didn’t mention bride either. It was weird but they have 3 dc and have been married for 10 years.

SpackelFrog · 21/09/2025 23:05

Father of the groom got the bride’s name wrong.

TeenLifeMum · 21/09/2025 23:06

Foundationns · 21/09/2025 23:03

It must have been a setup. Stupid and disrespectful joke.

The key thing is pretty well known and was done a lot years ago. Early Facebook trend. It’s supposed to be lighthearted. Some crowds it would work but others not so much. Definitely wouldn’t have been one for my older relatives.

BramStoner · 21/09/2025 23:08

One FotB talked at length about worrying his daughter would be left on the shelf because she was so fat.
Another discussed his fears that his daughter would marry “the last bum-picker off the boat from Bangalore”.
Best man speech that was just utter drivel “remember when we did that thing, what the fuck right? Fucking A, it’s like what?”