Noise cancelling headphones can I refuse them

[Grk]

What's your view on noise cancelling headphones do you think they do good or bad for the child?

I've been approached by my childs teacher saying he seems to find it harder the last few weeks with the noise level in the classroom his not diagnosed autistic but is diagnosed adhd.(Possibly could be autistic also )
We've already been through this with the school in a previous year , both me and his dad didn't want to give him noise cancelling headphones for a few reasons I do believe they make him massively stand out amongst his fellow peers and also his not then getting acquainted to general levels of daily noise in life and will rely on these for the easier option.

Today however his teacher approached me saying about it again and how he knows he doesn't want us to use them but have we considered ear loops also basically an in ear headphone. I said I'd speak to his dad
Upon speaking to his dad his also still dead against it again mainly because it doesn't allow our son to get used to basic every day noise which is what we all have to live with in life . Our son is perfectly fine in the huge loud hall at lunch time so is he with daily general noises out and about on the roads. He can manage supermarkets all fine no issues. It's just the classroom with the children chatting that disturbs and frustates him mainly whilst his trying to do his work so he tells us.

I know it sounds selfish but I have to agree I don't really want him using any type of headphones and do believe he needs to adjust to noise . However because I work at the school I also see him out of the classroom so I do understand their view on this but it makes me feel super awkward if yet again I refuse to allow the teacher to put them
on him.

The article isn't about ADHD and potential autism, so it's totally irrelevant.

I only recently tried noise cancelling headphones and they’re amazing. I’ve had 30 years to ‘adjust to everyday noises’ and I still find some intolerable. I really doubt that wearing them in class is going to have a negative impact on him.

Your child doesn’t have hyperacusis which is a stand alone problem . They have ADHD with noise sensitivity as part of this.
I’m 47 with ADHD . I can’t concentrate with lots of noise and find certain noises so irritating that it is distressing.
I have only started wearing noise cancelling headsets recently and it is soo much better.

Please allow your son the chance to try headphones in the classroom when the children are working idependently.

Kids wear headphones all the time now by choice. He won’t stand out .

The article isn’t about noise sensitivity caused by neurodiversity, so it’s not really relevant here.

Your child is neurodivergant, you can't cure that by exposing him to things that distress him. No matter how much you expose him to something , it will still continue to distress him , in fact it will become increasingly more distressing.
Stop being ridiculous and allow the child to use the aid he needs to participate in life

OP I've no advice as I've had the same dilemma! I agree on your reasons for refusing but I also agree with using them in specific circumstances like the classroom if he's struggling to concentrate. It's a tricky one, does your DS have a preference?
Is it worth trialling them for the rest of the term to see if it makes a difference or not? He would still be exposed to noise in other situations and it could help him academically? I assume the teacher would be agreeable to DS being in charge as to when he wears them? So they wouldn't be on for the full school day but just during the times he's struggling to concentrate?
He is only 7 so you do have time to work on helping him concentrate without the ear defenders and saying yes now doesn't mean you can't say no in the future?

OP, a quick google says that hyperacusis is mainly caused by ear infections, head injuries, other physical brain or ear conditions, or trauma.

Noise sensitivity due to neurodiversity is a completely different thing entirely.

Noise in a supermarket or playground when he doesn't have to concentrate on his work is one thing; noise that is a distraction when he should be learning is quite another. Why wouldn't you get him to try them for say 8 weeks, see if makes a positive difference in his concentraction levels? I wear them in the office so I can concentrate easily.

OP, you said yourself that your son can cope with noise outside the classroom, it's just when he is trying to concentrate that he needs the reasonable adjustments. Why not just let him try the ear defenders for a bit, and see if it helps? If it doesn't help, you can try something else.

I just read it. For a moment I’ll address it as it is written. The thing that stands out is that the person must have the freedom to leave the distressing sound for the technique to work. Can your son leave the classroom repeatedly without disrupting his learning?

I also don’t think this is actually talking about the kind of noise your son is dealing with. For example, I have a particular issue with the sound of pencils. They make my teeth hurt and my whole body can shake sometimes. I can’t avoid people using pencils. So without having the benefit of therapists because I’m too old for that, I have simply dealt with being around people using pencils and tried to endure the discomfort. I have learned ways to breath deeply and to distract myself. The pain never goes away, but I have gotten better at hiding it. That makes other people more comfortable and makes it easier for me to function in the world. There are never going to be any pencils on my desk though.

So you actively don’t want to help your child be more comfortable in school?

weird.

I'm 54. I still haven't adjusted to noise, despite being exposed to it for decades.

And has your DC actually been diagnosed with this condition?

OP I think you may be focusing on sound sensitivity without ADHD such as tinnitus and that’s why you are focusing in on this article and not considering the wider ADHD/Autism context.

This article may be helpful. https://www.verywellmind.com/adhd-symptom-sound-sensitivity-5272331

Why not encourage him to try the headphones in class to see how he gets on?

The single most important question is has anyone spoken to your child about it?

Has he been asked if HE would like to try wearing loops? That he could just trial them for a week and see if it made HIM more comfortable at school?

The idea that you can simply desensitise to noise when the cause is ND is not correct.

The nearest equivalent is refusing your child a hearing aid and just asking him to listen harder because you don’t anyone to see anything in his ears.

My take is that neither of you as parents have come to terms with possible ND diagnosis and are scrambling for reasons to avoid confirmation through aids that assist him.

I have just read some of the hyper accousis leaflet you posted as I have this myself as an adult.

I have to say I disagree with it. If I went to a firework display and instead of focusing on the sound, I tried to focus on the colour. I would have physical pain and tinnitus and very likely ear damage as fireworks are loud enough to damage hearing. I know from personal experience that noise levels other people have been fine with have actually been loud enough to damage my ears.

I am an ex sound engineer, so I do have quite a bit of experience of this and of db levels in general. My issues became worse with noise exposure.

I use earplugs myself now when the noise levels are uncomfortably loud. Although I try not to overuse them at other times as I don't want to become too accustomed to them.

I have suffered hearing damage and tinnitus trying to adapt to sounds that other people are comfortable with but I find painful.

I have had hearing therapy and seen audiologists and the advice given is always the same as the article you linked to. But in my experience this is simply not the case and I have come to the conclusion that ear plugs in situations I find uncomfortably loud are worth it.

I understand your thought process as this is the standard advice for hyper accousis, however I believe we are all different and have different ears and some people are simply more sensitive to noise and hearing damage than others.

I would be led by what my child says or feels is uncomfortable but try not to overuse them in quiet situations.

My daughter has ears like mine and I will help her to use whatever ear plugs she feels comfortable with.

I don't think you get used to the noise levels, and over time my ear problems have become worse trying to adapt - so now I take sensible measures to stay comfortable.

I don't think I have adhd - I just have noise sensitivity

I would also say that this may or may not be hyper accousis? Does the sound irritate and distract or is it painful and uncomfortable?

What does he say?

I read the article.

My son is also sound sensitive autistic and adhd. The advice we received from his OT was to not use ear defenders constantly as then it just makes coping with noise even harder. However she was very clear that they should still be used to if not using them is a barrier to him living life or getting an education.

I think you should allow them in the class when necessary and stick to not using them out of school as you do.

I have adhd myself and it’s not just the sensitivity to noise it’s the inability to filter out the information so it draws my focus. I would have benefited from ear defenders at school massively, instead I never learned in the classroom and would have to read the workbooks etc at home/lunch. I’m an adult now and chose a job that doesn’t require me to work in an office. I’ve worked in supermarkets and loud children nurseries and all kinds of loud distracting places and cope fine because I’m not having to engage my higher level thinking brain for such jobs. I couldn’t have written my dissertation in these environments for example, I even found the university library could be too busy to focus.

read up on adhd and auditory processing.I don’t think you really understand what the problem is. I do agree it’s important to be able to function in the world as it is and to not use tools we don’t need and get bullied for it etc. just ask yourself how will he cope in the world if he’s got no qualifications and your refusal to let him use the tools he needs leads him to hate school and all learning and authority and fall in with the crowd who have the same feelings …..

As the parent of an ND child who uses loops to cope at school, you are both unbelievably cruel and selfish. It’s all about you. Do some courses, learn about sensory processing and give your child the resources he needs to cope. I can’t believe what I’ve just read.

Please try them - they may transform his life.

I couldn’t have worded it any better. You’re being unnecessarily unfair on your son op.

I am an ex teacher.

noise levels in the classroom really can be very very high. If you’ve not recently experienced it, then you might be surprised how hard it can be to concentrate through those noise levels even for NT children.

particularly with younger children as it’s much harder to get them to be quiet. I volunteered to help in reception one term because we had a ad who was struggling and bloody hell was it noisy.

Hyperacusis is not ADHD. I've a child who experiences hyperacusis and it's very different from what you are describing - it isn't getting frustrated and distracted by sounds in a particular environment, it's feeling physical pain and distress because of sounds.

The issue with ADHD and similar isn't that kind of sound sensitivity, it's the variety of noises and not being able to naturally filter them out. That's why he's being distracted and frustrated by the noise in the classroom where it is obvious that the variety leads to missing out on something needed and not in the supermarket where the variety of noises isn't really making him miss out on anything of value.

Have you ever tried to sit in an environment where there are 5 different conversations are going on around you that you can hear word for word while you're trying to read or write? For many people, of all neurotypes, it's frustrating and makes it more difficult to concentrate.

In daily adult life, many of us use adjustments to deal with this. The office that I regularly work in has the above regularly - it's an open office next to a busy road, my desk is in a place in the middle and I can hear every conversation going on in the room that is had at a normal talking volume. I'm allowed to just 'take the easier option', pick up my laptop and go work in another part of the building as I choose when I'm in office. I adjust my hours so I do most of my admin work while it's quiet. My husband specifically chooses to be a solo worker on site. I know many adults across many professions who use things like loops or have other accommodations to deal with this sort of thing.

My kids have all at one point used something to dampen noise - it was made available to them, and they decided when to use it. For me, it's simply a matter that I've no reason to my kids suffer and create a block for their education for something adults do regularly when we have other options available.

None of my kids, even the one who experiences hyperacusis, ever chose to wear them all the time.

Absolutely this.

The effort your son will be putting in to stay focused and regulated in class is huge and exhausting.

Why would you not want to try something that will help him thrive in class.

I have ADHD and use loops in work to help me concentrate in busy office environments.

But I cope fine in loud clubs (or did many moons ago) it's because I wasn't expected to learn and work in them.

Why not give the in ear ones a try if your son would like to? He can’t use them in lessons where he will need to interact with others, so he won’t use them constantly. It will just give him a little break.