Page 6 | Underwhelming Mothers Day area

Pipsquiggle · 2025-03-30T08:07:41+00:00

First of all I am married to a good, decent man who I love. He just is rubbish at organising anything This morning I have got 2 cards and a box of maltesers . Better than nothing. No cup of tea made. Just a bit of 'meh' TBH Anyone else in the same boat?

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:01

saveforthat · 30/03/2025 15:59

Christ, are you always this preachy?

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I think a lot of us are fed up of seeing the same threads every year, by mothers who are annoyed that they didn't more on mothers day.

No one owes you anything on mothers day.

You can't force someone else to get you something.

Be grateful for what you have

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:02

Presumably the preachers don't have little rant about anything, ever. Because "there's always someone else worse off".

Newyorklady · 30/03/2025 16:03

Same here.
2 sons.
zero consideration.
Thoroughly fed up.

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:05

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:02

Presumably the preachers don't have little rant about anything, ever. Because "there's always someone else worse off".

Or we are annoyed at spoilt ungrateful adult women who act like toddlers, and get annoyed when they are not pampered on mothers day.

Look at the amount of threads about this exact same issue (i was disappointed on mothers day) on mumsnet today.

There are loads.

No, it's not ok to expect to be a pampered princess today.

Other people don't want to pamper and spoil you. People are busy in their own lives.

A card and flowers/chocolates is enough.

The OP of this thread got two cards and chocolates, and is still complaining!

What do you want? A spa day? A new car?

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:07

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:05

Or we are annoyed at spoilt ungrateful adult women who act like toddlers, and get annoyed when they are not pampered on mothers day.

Look at the amount of threads about this exact same issue (i was disappointed on mothers day) on mumsnet today.

There are loads.

No, it's not ok to expect to be a pampered princess today.

Other people don't want to pamper and spoil you. People are busy in their own lives.

A card and flowers/chocolates is enough.

The OP of this thread got two cards and chocolates, and is still complaining!

What do you want? A spa day? A new car?

Edited

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Well you sound a fucking delight 😂

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:08

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:07

Well you sound a fucking delight 😂

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I'm more delightful than the OP who received not one but TWO cards, AND chocolates, and still came on here to have a moan

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:09

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:05

Or we are annoyed at spoilt ungrateful adult women who act like toddlers, and get annoyed when they are not pampered on mothers day.

Look at the amount of threads about this exact same issue (i was disappointed on mothers day) on mumsnet today.

There are loads.

No, it's not ok to expect to be a pampered princess today.

Other people don't want to pamper and spoil you. People are busy in their own lives.

A card and flowers/chocolates is enough.

The OP of this thread got two cards and chocolates, and is still complaining!

What do you want? A spa day? A new car?

Edited

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Why even come to this thread? To spread your sparkling personality? Or do you just love to be a miserable tango whiskey alpha tango to others, and go out of your way to do so? Just can't help yourself i guess

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:13

Chariots77 · 30/03/2025 16:09

Why even come to this thread? To spread your sparkling personality? Or do you just love to be a miserable tango whiskey alpha tango to others, and go out of your way to do so? Just can't help yourself i guess

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The irony.

Of course you sound like Mary sunshine yourself....not.

Newsflash for you. On no thread ever on mumsnet, does everyone agree with the OP.

That never ever happens. I'm not sure why you think that happens.

People come to agree or disagree with the OP. And write their opinions. I disagree with her.

Sunnyside4 · 30/03/2025 16:31

I've got the first Mothers Day off in ten years. Have fallen out with my Mum (she's really not easy) and DD is away staying with BF's family. Not going to moan though, DD's BF is really nice and I appreciate his family live away. Nothing new about my Mum being difficult and to be honest it's a relief to have her here moaning and talking at us all evening. The cats gave me a card and some chocolate and DH and I have been for a lovely countryside walk. DD will visit tomorrow after work.

MsCactus · 30/03/2025 16:32

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 15:55

Yes but the idea back then would have been

"Give something to your mother, if you want to give her something ".

Now mothers EXPECT to get something on mothers day. They don't give their children or husbands any choice or say in the mothers day.

They don't give their children any choice in the matter.

Then the children feel pressured, and they start to rebel under the pressure, and in rebelling against the pressure, they don't get their mothers anything.

If its not a choice, and we feel forced to do it, it's not enjoyable for anyone.

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The idea back then was the kids DID THINGS for the mum, rather than buying things. For example, they did the house jobs, did the cooking for the day, baked things for the mum, picked flowers for them.

It was nothing to do with gifts or money. And tbh I think a lot of mums nowadays would be happy with their kids treating them like this too - it's not really about gifts, it's a day for kids to show their appreciation for their mum. I get why mums are upset when they don't get that. It's literally a centuries old tradition

hereismydog · 30/03/2025 16:42

It’s my first ever Mother’s Day, DP is at work but will be home soon. He left before I was properly awake but did manage to extract our 3mo from his crib without disturbing me and change him into an ‘I love Mummy’ onesie this morning, then went downstairs and tidied the living room and kitchen and walked the dog (woke up to a text telling me he’d taken him out!), presumably so I could spend the day just relaxing with our little one he’s usually quite gruff and unsentimental about most things, but he does make a lovely, thoughtful effort for things he knows might be important to me. Not sure if be has got me anything, he might have as he made an excuse for me not to open his car boot yesterday.

No card or cup of tea in bed for me today as I was fast asleep and already have a habit of forgetting he’s made me a cuppa anyway, so I don’t mind! Would much rather be left to sleep in peace than be woken with a cup of tea that I won’t drink anyway he doesn’t like cards very much but he knows I do, so I really hope he’s got me one ‘from DS’ as I would like one to keep in the memory box.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you

Original poster

Pipsquiggle · 30/03/2025 16:43

MolkosTeenageAngst · 30/03/2025 12:58

So your husband is useless on the other 364 days a year, why did you think he would step up on this one day? To be honest it seems madness to be grumpy that your DH didn’t make an effort for Mother’s Day if he doesn’t make an effort to share the load day to day and surely it would be better for you long term if you focused on getting him to share the household tasks and parenting normally rather than running yourself so ragged you get to Mother’s Day and don’t even want to spend time with the kids who made you mothers. Your priorities are wrong here!

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@MolkosTeenageAngst
No you are incorrect.

My DH has a 'big' job - very senior at a big company. He works long hours and often has to go to board meetings at the drop of a hat. I cannot rely on him for day to day childcare/ after school stuff unless I book it in months in advance or get his PA to change stuff if she can.

Over 15 years ago we decided that we would prioritise his career which has paid off. He gets paid very well and we have a nice lifestyle. I also work FT in a mid/senior position but also do virtually all childcare / house admin.

By me doing the above, I have facilitated his career trajectory, so yes, I do expect a bit of recognition and appreciation on days like today.

OP posts:

Goldenbear · 30/03/2025 16:43

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:08

I'm more delightful than the OP who received not one but TWO cards, AND chocolates, and still came on here to have a moan

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This forum is named, 'Mumsnet', why are you shocked by this topic coming up, hilarious!

qwertyasdfgzxcv · 30/03/2025 16:45

Pipsquiggle · 30/03/2025 09:55

I wanted a cuppa.

I wanted the morning off.

I wanted my DH to take our youngest to a sporting event but he 'HAD' to coach our older DC because none of the other coaches could make it. I asked if that's because it's mother's day and all the other coaches were doing something with their wives - he said yes. (My DH is the only coach who turns up week in / week out)

I also think that a card, a cuppa and chocolate is the bare minimum to expect

He sounds like a man with good integrity.

I'd love malteasers and cards but I guess it's perspective

crumblingschools · 30/03/2025 16:46

With a big job he still manages to do football coaching. He could fit you in too but on a more regular basis not just on Mother’s Day

GinandRunning · 30/03/2025 16:49

Out of my 3 children (2 of whom are adults) only my youngest got me a card , chocolate and bought me a coffee in bed. The other 2 said ‘happy mother’s day’ about 2.30 this afternoon!

MightyBust · 30/03/2025 16:50

We're usually pretty low key here, but my usual card, daffodils, and chocolates morphed into chocolates only today.

I don't think DH could be bothered going to M&S last night.

Original poster

Pipsquiggle · 30/03/2025 16:53

The afternoon has been better.

The sporting event that I took DC2 to was cut short as teams dropped out as they had to get back ............for mother's day lunches 🤯
We got back home at 2ish and have been on a lovely walk and had a drink and a bit of kick about in the local park. I have really loved this.

DH is making tea which is appreciated.

OP posts:

Goldenbear · 30/03/2025 16:54

Op, my DC are late and mid teen but the late teen walked in with beautiful flowers last night and my youngest bought me a necklace (costume jewellery) I had a joint card off them. DH is in a big job, I'm in a fairly big job and they don't need organising now but when younger DH managed it. I think you are fine to think this.

Original poster

Pipsquiggle · 30/03/2025 17:01

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 16:05

Or we are annoyed at spoilt ungrateful adult women who act like toddlers, and get annoyed when they are not pampered on mothers day.

Look at the amount of threads about this exact same issue (i was disappointed on mothers day) on mumsnet today.

There are loads.

No, it's not ok to expect to be a pampered princess today.

Other people don't want to pamper and spoil you. People are busy in their own lives.

A card and flowers/chocolates is enough.

The OP of this thread got two cards and chocolates, and is still complaining!

What do you want? A spa day? A new car?

Edited

Show quote history

Oh just sod off @Abbygabby87

Read my post just a bit further up about the sacrifices I have made so that, as a whole, our family can thrive.

I do believe in being great role models for our DC, part of this is acknowledging and appreciating the effort people put in - days like this in the calendar do matter.

OP posts:

Kandalama · 30/03/2025 17:07

hereismydog · 30/03/2025 16:42

It’s my first ever Mother’s Day, DP is at work but will be home soon. He left before I was properly awake but did manage to extract our 3mo from his crib without disturbing me and change him into an ‘I love Mummy’ onesie this morning, then went downstairs and tidied the living room and kitchen and walked the dog (woke up to a text telling me he’d taken him out!), presumably so I could spend the day just relaxing with our little one he’s usually quite gruff and unsentimental about most things, but he does make a lovely, thoughtful effort for things he knows might be important to me. Not sure if be has got me anything, he might have as he made an excuse for me not to open his car boot yesterday.

No card or cup of tea in bed for me today as I was fast asleep and already have a habit of forgetting he’s made me a cuppa anyway, so I don’t mind! Would much rather be left to sleep in peace than be woken with a cup of tea that I won’t drink anyway he doesn’t like cards very much but he knows I do, so I really hope he’s got me one ‘from DS’ as I would like one to keep in the memory box.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you

I just love the
I love Mummy onesie idea as a surprise wake-up present

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 17:09

Pipsquiggle · 30/03/2025 17:01

Oh just sod off @Abbygabby87

Read my post just a bit further up about the sacrifices I have made so that, as a whole, our family can thrive.

I do believe in being great role models for our DC, part of this is acknowledging and appreciating the effort people put in - days like this in the calendar do matter.

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Correction. They matter to you.

They cause stress for other people.

There is a large amount of people that I've talked to over the years, who have told me that they find mothers day extremely stressful.

What do they get out of the day if they are not a mother? Nothing.

If it was daughters day, and you had to buy things for your daughter, and run round after her and you get absolutely nothing in return, would you enjoy that day?

On top of that. A lot of mothers are unhappy with whatever you get them on mothers day. It is never enough.

You can never do enough for some mothers.

So this day is unhappy for a lot of people. It has bad memories for a lot of people.

Because their mother is angry on this day, sulky and making them feel bad.

Every year.

Kandalama · 30/03/2025 17:17

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 17:09

Correction. They matter to you.

They cause stress for other people.

There is a large amount of people that I've talked to over the years, who have told me that they find mothers day extremely stressful.

What do they get out of the day if they are not a mother? Nothing.

If it was daughters day, and you had to buy things for your daughter, and run round after her and you get absolutely nothing in return, would you enjoy that day?

On top of that. A lot of mothers are unhappy with whatever you get them on mothers day. It is never enough.

You can never do enough for some mothers.

So this day is unhappy for a lot of people. It has bad memories for a lot of people.

Because their mother is angry on this day, sulky and making them feel bad.

Every year.

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Surely if you’re not a mother it’s not your day so just move on.
If you aren’t interested anyway it’s just not your day so move on.
However
Its not dissimilar to Christmas for some

Some people have no family or don’t like the presents they’ve got or are fed up with family descending on them
so for some Christmas is a bit crap, sad, stressful etc.

That doesn’t mean we should ban it for everyone.

Each to their own.

Goldenbear · 30/03/2025 17:19

Abbygabby87 · 30/03/2025 17:09

Correction. They matter to you.

They cause stress for other people.

There is a large amount of people that I've talked to over the years, who have told me that they find mothers day extremely stressful.

What do they get out of the day if they are not a mother? Nothing.

If it was daughters day, and you had to buy things for your daughter, and run round after her and you get absolutely nothing in return, would you enjoy that day?

On top of that. A lot of mothers are unhappy with whatever you get them on mothers day. It is never enough.

You can never do enough for some mothers.

So this day is unhappy for a lot of people. It has bad memories for a lot of people.

Because their mother is angry on this day, sulky and making them feel bad.

Every year.

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Yes but that's not the case for the OP. Teaching your children consideration for others, to be not be self absorbed, caring about your Mum if she has cared for you, is not exactly exceptional. This is the person who gave birth to you, not any old person! If they have been awful to you then yes, you are unlikely to care, it doesn't sound like this is the case for the OP.

Cornishclio · 30/03/2025 17:29

Shouldn’t the effort for Mother’s Day be from your children not your husband? I agree a cuppa and a lie in is the least you should get though . Did the children choose the cards and get the Maltesers? I would be happy with that.