Would you find this gift rude/hurtful?

[Darkclothes]

MIL recently bought me this cooking apron for my birthday. I do cook meals from scratch daily, but only bake cakes for birthdays- so maybe twice a year!

I've put on weight the past 2 yrs. A combination of finishing 12yrs of sub-fertility and rounds of IVF, then finding out I'll never have my own children, moving from an active job to WFH and also an injury which has limited how much exercise I can do.

MIL and I had a falling out 10yrs ago, but have been on reasonable terms since. I don't know if it's a subtle hint to my weight gain or I'm overthinking and she just saw a cooking apron and didn't think about the text. Would you feel hurt/offended by this?

Yeah that’s passive-aggressive. How bitchy.

Just be thankful that you aren’t a spiteful witch like she is and try not to let it affect you.

I think it's meant to be a joke - a play on words. Cake and chocolate don't make your clothes shrink, they make you put on weight, but by wording it like that you are sort of saying you don't care about weight, good things like cake and chocolate are more important. Its the kind of thing my ASD mum would find funny.

But there's also a mean undertone that I don't like.

I’m usually quite sensitive but I honestly wouldn’t be offended by this x

Drop it off at the charity shop closest to her house and donate them £20 if they promise to make it part of their window display.

Absolutely nothing wrong with it, it’s a bit if fun, what’s wrong with everyone these days, always looking for a fight!

I would see it as a stupid joke. Like those countless birthday cards and mugs about mothers drinking wine.

It sounds like you have had a very tough time OP, you need love and support and not jokes. But I would not think it's personal.

Was going to ask if she gives similar nonsense to her as well? To gauge if offensive or just stupid?

Thats so rude, normally I'd say down give the satisfaction ignore it.

But actually I'd be so tempted next gift time so her birthday an apron with a nasty comment about aging

Cut it up and use as cleaning cloths.

It would amuse me, and I am uncomfortably overweight due to cake.

Thoughtless and unaware - she isn't close, so really has no idea.

You can easily find out by inviting her over, and saying - I've made some scones, try one. Then as she takes a bite say ' I'm not wearing the apron you got me because a tiny part of me wondered if you were being a bit mean'

If she is horrified at her faux pas then you will have a better relationship and agree flowers are always safe:)

If not, call your dh and leave them to it.

I'd give it back to her with a laugh and say 'sorry this doesn't fit, the ties are too short - perhaps you can get a refund, or keep it for yourself?'

What has your dh said about it,?
He should be ahvihg a word with her and telling her he thinks that was unlind at best and nit to do it again
She won't like her precious son being unimpressed

What a bizarre gift. I can't imagine why anyone would think it appropriate.

My mil said to me before my wedding that I don't want to be a fat bride. I was a 12 to 14 and am tall. I looked great. She's short. I do like her but I'll never forget.

Mil is a nasty bitch
Does DH buy her Mother's Day presents?
Regift!!

Yikes!

Charity shop is a good call.

Another vote for regifting it to her.

How vile for you. Makes me even more grateful that if Carlsberg made MILs, the prototype would be mine.

OP, stick it in a charity bag and don't be part of buying her anything again, there's no need to waste money on negativity.
The best form of revenge is to rise above the childish behaviour and back away from it.
When it's Christmas/your birthday specifically ask DH to tell her you don't need anything but she can donate to a charity if she wishes to. Buy yourself something and enjoy spending time with people who care about you.

That's nasty and I'd bin it.

Its probably just something she found funny, I think you're overthinking it. I have one that says ' thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.' I think it was from my cousin.

This …maybe you are being over sensitive.

I don’t think it is a thoughtful gift. From hundreds of designs your MIL could have selected I think she picked one that is a bit rude.

It’s a bad joke if that is the intention.

Has she did anything similar, which had you questioning her motive? My MIL is a vindictive old twonk, and that apron would be exactly her sort of dick move 'gift'.

I suspect your MIL is horrible. When my MIL visits now, I politely make my excuses and leave my husband to entertain her (I do feel for him, because he can't be arsed with her either).

Its not fun. Weight gain is a sensitive subject for pretty much everyone. If the OP and her MIL had a no holds barred piss take type of relationship it might be a suitable gift (though even then I'd think twice), however they clearly do NOT have that type of friendship/relationship. It's an utterly snide gift.

Wow!
What a cow!
I'm sure you'll find plenty of revenge gifts on the net....I'd send her one back...