Would the police do anything?

[DontKnowWhatToSay25]

I wrote to someone telling them if they attempted to contact me or my family I'd contact the police. I've blocked them and their partner from all sm etc.

I then contacted their partner with a separate message.

They've written to me together.

Can I call the police?

LMAO - like the Police will.

And your husband isn't to blame for this at all?
The police have better things to do then get involved people's personal affairs .

I can only assume that you are fixated on this couple because it gives you an excuse not to address the real problem, which is your DH! "Back where he is loved" - what does this even mean, the two of you need to be working on your relationship and deciding how, and if, you want to move forward together. You certainly don't get to dictate to the OW's DH (who presumably was not complicit in this affair!) that he cannot meet up with your mutual friends. What next? - you forbid them from going to the same supermarket? To be honest, if I was your DH anyway, the last place I would want to be was somewhere where I might run into the other person's partner.

The police do not give a shit about where your husband sticks his dick. And if you think that he wasn't an equal partner in that action then you are naive in the extreme.

Contacting her husband is harassment and what you describe sounds like a threat - you don't get to tell people who they can and can't socialise with.

It's more likley that the police will be around at your house charging you with harassment.

Log it with the police, making it clear you had requested a cessation of contact from them. Them continuing moves into harassment. They won’t do anything now, unless there’s threats against you some capacity, but it will serve you to have it logged/‘on file’.

lol.

If they contact you three times with harassment or threatening behaviour and yiu have proof then yes yiu can contact them. If it is just once or twice then no. There is official guidance if you Google it

Surely he was loved before he started shagging someone else?

There's no threatening behaviour.

You cannot control who the other persons husband is friends with @DontKnowWhatToSay25

From your update, nobody can advise you on her because the content and intention in the correspondence is unknown to us randoms on the internet.

You’re possibly better seeking marriage counselling or even better counselling for yourself to navigate through this and possibly starting a new life for yourself.

There was clearly something in their letter that made you feel frightened or angry.
You could show it to the police and aske for their advice. If they have threatened you, then at least it is on record.

However, it could be that after writing this letter and maybe letting off steam, you won't hear from them again and it might be best to leave it alone. It might have just displayed an unpleasant tone. What was the tone of your note to them?

What does your husband think? Does he think you should go to the police?

I think I would opt for leaving it alone to see if that will be that, unless the letter really did frighten you.

Um, if I was sending harassing, insulting and threatening messages like the OP I wouldn’t be ‘logging’ that with the police.

There is from you - you told her husband to stay away from his friends. Or what??? What will you do if he continues to communicate with his friends? The threat is implied.

No the letter just said said that they were sorry, but they didn't feel it was possible to dictate where they go. That they'd like to move on..She said she wouldn't reply to the points I made in the letter I sent her.

The DH was complicit in the end. That's why he shouldn't be able to see our friends.

In that case do not call them. No crime has been committed. It is not a crime to write someone a letter even if you told them not to contact you. If she was harassing you it might be a different matter.

What will you do if the woman’s DH doesn’t stop mingling with mutual friends? What was the point of sending him that? He doesn’t have to, he probably won’t and you can’t do anything about it.
I hope you can out this stage of lashing out at the wrong people behind you quickly and look in a clear headed way at the man who did do something to ruin your relationship - your own husband.

You don't get to tell people to say away from mutual friends. This isn't the Wild West. Grow up.

Is this a reverse? If not, it's up to the friends if they see them or not.

You don't get to dictate who the husband does or doesn't see ,this isn't the playground you are all adults

If you think you are in the right to ask him to stay away from mutual friends, then why havnt you just asked those mutual friends to stay away from him?

They are completely right and she is right to ignore your questions. Leave them alone now. Your husband is the only person who has put you in this position, not her, not her DH.

Let me see if I'm getting this right.... You want to call the police about this woman because you sent a message to her partner threatening them to stay away from mutual friends (who are presumably all autonamous adults) but partner wrote back 'sorry we won't be doing this, love and hugs me and OW' and nothing threatening.

Sorry you've been cheated on OP and even more sorry that you don't seem to hold your 'D'H remotely accountable. However, you sound f'ing nuts tbh. I think you're the one who needs to leave people alone and see a therapist who can help you deal with your personal trauma and hopefully help you summon enough self respect to leave your dirty, cheating husband.

I think you need to contact a counsillor being honest. This is not a healthy way to go about things. Your husband is the one that cheated on you not the woman and you have made your thoughts clear to her and to her husband, outed the affair and took your cheating husband back. Then you reached out to one of them and got a response. The police are not going to waste their time with this. Please speak to a professional though.

So, If it was me, I 100% would feel like he shouldn't be able to see our friends 😅 and I'd want our friends to take my "side" as such. But as much as I'd feel those things, I would never verbalise or write that to my ex or my friends. I'd take the high ground as much as I could

Your not wrong to feel the way you do. But you can't act like that

You don't get to dictate anything here other than whether or not you stay married to your cheating, scumbag husband.