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I can't stand this no more

256 replies

icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 01:43

Literally as the title says.

My husband thinks he's the bloody king of the universe. He's a bloody barrister not a world leader.

I am a qualified biomedical scientist but never worked in the field as Covid hit the year I qualified then I was pregnant twice so been out of the working world for a while. I'm not thick but Jesus Christ he tells me I am.

He apparently knows everything! I am always wrong.

Any opinion or idea I have on absolutely anything is wrong and he loves to tell me why. I've given up answering back and just say 'oh ok' and then his rants continue. This is on any topic from wall painting to current affairs. He even apparently knows more about women's makeup than I do and what looks good and what doesn't.

But do you know what really grates on me? It's the constant criticism and name calling.

The house will always be spotless when he comes home and he will say Why is this random wet item of clothing here on the stairs?.... it's obvious I've clearly taken the washing out the washing machine and dropped it and not realised. His response will always then be 'can't do anything right can you', 'fuck me your thick as they come' etc

Dinners not ready bang on 7pm when he walks in the door it will be 7:20pm. His response is 'how thick can you be, you know I get in at 7pm! Some of us work'.
Well tough cookies the children were messing about in the bath having fun so dinners a bit late

You get the jist

Do you know what's also fun about my husband is his damn paranoia. Any text message I get he reads and then questions me on it. Even messages from my mum which always end with his telling me whoever has text me is a psycho or a freak when my mum and or friends are all normal nice people.

Then he just pesters me for sex every single day! When I say no. He responds with 'I can't even stand the look of you'. Typical mind games

Arrgggghhhh I could scream.

What he doesn't know is thick little me has a new job lined up in May when my year maternity leave is over. What he also doesn't know is when my nan passed away in October she left me a decent amount to get a solid deposit down. What he also doesn't know is that I've spoken with my mum and she has said for me and the children to live with her for a few months once I start my new job and once I've been there long enough I can apply for a mortgage then so I will get one. What he also doesn't know is I'm divorcing his sorry ass but I'm playing it smart.

Just needed a rant

OP posts:
zerogrey · 26/01/2025 01:46

Good for you OP, he sounds like a right twat. Have you got separate accounts and such?

ScottBakula · 26/01/2025 01:48

Why on earth are you you still with this selfish git ?
I realise it's always easy for others on mn to say LTB but in this case you really do need to get out of this soul crushing relationship.

Edited to say
Sorry I somehow missed your last paragraph.
Well done ! Take great delight in handling him the divorce papers

zerogrey · 26/01/2025 01:49

ScottBakula · 26/01/2025 01:48

Why on earth are you you still with this selfish git ?
I realise it's always easy for others on mn to say LTB but in this case you really do need to get out of this soul crushing relationship.

Edited to say
Sorry I somehow missed your last paragraph.
Well done ! Take great delight in handling him the divorce papers

Edited

Have you actually read the post in it's entirety? OP is planning to do exactly that.

icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 01:50

No it's joint account but honestly I have come to bed tonight and kicked him on the sofa. I'm in my powerful era and truth be told all I'll do is open a new bank account. There's no money of mine in the account I work 1 day a week in a library before maternity leave so there's no money to take

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 26/01/2025 02:02

Every good wish for you going forward. He sounds truly horrible.

ThatMerryReader · 26/01/2025 02:06

You are enabling him, for goodness sake. Don't play his game and just bloody ignore him. And if he carries on in the long term then it would be time for lining up the ducks.

ByBrickEagle · 26/01/2025 02:06

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icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:08

ilovesooty · 26/01/2025 02:02

Every good wish for you going forward. He sounds truly horrible.

Thank you. Feeling quite positive really z he has just come upstairs and said can he come to bed. I said no. He's gone back downstairs with his tail between his legs feeling sorry for himself. Tomorrow morning he will be all lonely and nice for about an hour or two no doubt and then I will forgive him(or so he thinks) and then he will feel comfortable enough then to tell me the coffee I've bought is shit or suggest what a good idea it would be for me to wash the sofa cushions and the curtains while I'm at it.

OP posts:
icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:09

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No just an arrogant spoilt brat who thinks he's better than everyone else

OP posts:
icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:10

ThatMerryReader · 26/01/2025 02:06

You are enabling him, for goodness sake. Don't play his game and just bloody ignore him. And if he carries on in the long term then it would be time for lining up the ducks.

Ducks are already lined up.

OP posts:
Rachmorr57 · 26/01/2025 02:11

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Guavafish1 · 26/01/2025 02:11

make sure you get a solicitor advice first before you buy your own house. You might lose out.

Also try to record the abusive behaviour.

Good luck

Snoopdoggydog123 · 26/01/2025 02:12

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She literally is.
Right there in the OP.
If you can't be arsed to read it save yourself the embarrassment of commenting.

icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:15

So why on earth are you with him and have children with him?

Seriously? He obviously wasn't like this until I was pregnant with our second child. It all came out of the blue. He seemed annoyed at me for having severe morning sickness for months and then boom his true colours have shown

OP posts:
Lurkingandlearning · 26/01/2025 02:15

Not as clever as he thinks he is, is he? I hope you point that out to him before you leave.

icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:16

Lurkingandlearning · 26/01/2025 02:15

Not as clever as he thinks he is, is he? I hope you point that out to him before you leave.

Oh yes your right I will 100 percent be making that very clear as I drop the mic 🎤

OP posts:
UnicornWorld · 26/01/2025 02:16

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Are you able to read?

Good on you OP.

icantstandthis · 26/01/2025 02:19

Guavafish1 · 26/01/2025 02:11

make sure you get a solicitor advice first before you buy your own house. You might lose out.

Also try to record the abusive behaviour.

Good luck

I will. Thanks for mentioning that. The money that's for me is in my mums account so it's safe in the sense that it's technically hers as my nan verbally told her she wants me to have X amount. My mum won't let me down she can't wait for me to get away from him

OP posts:
OkayLetMeKnowHowItGoes · 26/01/2025 02:28

Just a warning.. he might go for half your inheritance

NattyTurtle59 · 26/01/2025 02:30

Well done OP. Life's too short to put up with that. Best of luck to you.

Pungifries · 26/01/2025 02:48

Good luck OP
I was in a similar situation a few years back.
Life will be so much better without him x

R053 · 26/01/2025 02:53

All the best OP - that sounds truly difficult. Glad that we don’t have to convince you to leave him.

unmemorableusername · 26/01/2025 02:53

Please take safety measures now to make sure he does t stalk you after you leave or use contact with the DCs to abuse you post split.

You need evidence of his abuse to have any chance of no contact post split.

Men like him are dangerous.

mnreader · 26/01/2025 02:54

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MidnightBloom · 26/01/2025 03:01

Bloody hell op you are one strong woman 💐💖 sending you even more strength. Times will get tough, keep chatting on here if it helps.

Wishing you all the very best of luck