Bonnie Blue -sex positivity or old fashioned shame?

[mids2019]

Bonnie Blue.....just why?

I guess we have a woman that has made a lot of money and notoriety out of an act but I really can't see this as being a positive really. I guess it does highlight the age old question whether we should be against at female promiscuity or not be judgemental about how a woman use her body but it does seem rather crass.

Anyway I prefer other world records perosnally.

Why do you feel it appropriate to police people's language? Being a prostitute is nothing to be proud of, it's not something to aspire to, it's not a career you'll find discussed in schools ok careers day. Bonnie Blue and her ilk are everything that is wrong with influencer led society. Prostitution should never have entered the mainstream for anything other than to discuss how to safeguard these women.

Do you see so many posts discussing £5 Lil from the other side of town selling blow jobs for a hit of heroin while having child after child put into care? No. Our concern should be with those women, not attention seekers who will, no doubt, end up as a £5 Lil in 20 years time.

Certainly sounds like it. I have a daughter the same age and I’d be very unimpressed if my dd was doing anything like this. Never mind encouraging it. But hey, apparently it’s paid for nice holidays so that’s ok 🙈

There's a whole generation of men who simply can't get laid (Incels).

They see an opportunity like this as christmas come early.

Those men have always existed and they have always used prostitutes.

It’s the inevitable result of framing women selling their sexuality as “empowering”.
Anyone who didn’t see this coming is incredibly naive.
If sex work is work, then she just works a lot, right?

I’m not policing anything. I just don’t think calling her a prostitute is quite the gotcha the poster intended it to be

@Tomatocutwithazigzagedge I can't believe they've had her on this morning , had to switch off when she said educational side of things. FFS stop the world I'm getting off

@SleepyHippy3 I think vile sums those men up perfectly actually

It makes me want to become Amish.

Money isn't the be all and end all so who cares what she made. She is a whore but that is her choice. If being a whore is seen as empowering other women and young girls then this country is fucked( no pun intended) We need to teach our young to have morals.

We need to teach girls that pandering to the male gaze is the exact opposite of empowering.

@SkiingIsHeaven i don’t think that is the flex you think it is. I would be absolutely horrified if my husband used those words to describe another woman, particularly one who is little more than a girl. I feel incredibly sorry for her and I like to think my husband would save his judgment, if you haven’t walked a mile in their shoes and all that

No. Judgement is exactly what's needed

It’s all just social media again though. If a woman had sex with 1000 men in the 80’s or 90’s we wouldn’t have to know all about it.
I think she’s an attention seeking freak. It’s completely fucked up that it makes the news.

This pearl clutching ‘won’t somebody think of the children’ is a consequence of misogyny and it’s always used against women and not men. Whereas it’s equal part embarrassing for the world to have seen your dad naked as it is your mum. The concern on the ‘mother’ as being viewed as a ‘ whore’ is part of this Madonna whore dichotomy that expects purity from mothers.

in someways it’s a relief to see women like Bonnie and Lily, because until onlyfans the amount that women were earning from adult content due to the rise of free porn websites was pretty slim and there was more money for the more extreme the sex acts got. At least these women are financially benefiting and are clearly agents of choice rather than desperation and are earning enough that after their 5 yr stint in porn they’ll never need to work again.

It was more my understanding at the beginning that Bonnie’s thing was just straight laced v sex, but with ‘barely legals’ (aka consenting adults) as her shock factor /
target market however, it does seem now that in order to capitalise views the sex acts are becoming more and more extreme which I sort of think proves that porn is inherently exploitative.

on Bonnie, I really really dislike how she appeals to misogyny and really plays into it to further her brand. The narrative that wives are lazy and withhold sex, furthering the narrative that men are owed women’s bodies and ignoring the various reasons that’s wives and mothers might not feel in the mood (the fact that a lot of men are clueless about women’s pleasure, tiredness, children, unequal division of domestic labour etc)

i do wonder about their mental health too, it can’t give you a good perception of men. It makes me think men are pretty vile actually

Attention seeking freak just about sums her up. The girl on the sofa with her on Good Morning was lovely and clearly enraged but conducting herself well under the circumstances

And have you anything to say about the 1057 men actively taking part?

^ oh and as for the men who leave her hate and comments like ‘hot dog down a hallway etc’ think it says 2 things

1. they are clueless about the female body’
2. they are beyond hypocritical because the vast majority of men consume porn likely from free sites where it’s known the women are a) receiving dismal sums of money b) dubious circumstances, so they are cool with consuming that type of porn when a woman is being exploited but take an issue with a woman making serious coin from it…

You can work in poor conditions and be exploited in any industry though?

The men are equally disgusting, if not more. Only, the men are anonymous, they’re not seeking fame from this. Only girls are being fed this. That’s why we need to teach girls that selling their sexuality is the most basic form of misogyny and the ultimate way to disempower women. That it’s not a way to become an empowered woman as Bonnie Blue is promoting.
Of course we also need to teach boys that girls aren’t a product to be bought and commodified. But this thread is specifically about “female empowerment” which is not about boys and why the focus of this conversation hasn’t been on them specifically.

But the pearl clutching think of your future children line isn’t the way to go. The consequences of the adult industry is and I’m not even talking about the general inability to integrate back into a more typical profession, I’m talking health impact of these extreme sex acts, the mental health impact, stds

If sex work is work, then how come we don’t see men raking in millions doing it? If it really was work, then men would be out there dominating and getting paid more than women, just like in every other industry.

If it was work, we would have parents encouraging their daughters to sell access to their bodies instead of going into medicine, law or engineering.

Blimey, sex worker or not, what a term to call another woman. And what about the 1057 men, many of whom who were much older than her, yet rocked up to take their turn?

This is an unposted repost of my comment on another thread:

Patriachy's big con.

Tell women their body belongs to their (future) husband and if they have sex outside marriage or even enjoy it within marriage they are worthless.

Men lie or outright abuse her to get to her body anyway, then society blames her for not trying hard enough to prevent it.

But that is not the big con.

Women turn round and say "fuck this for a game of soldiers, I'm the boss of my body, I'll have loads and loads of sex just to show you I don't have to folllow your rules!"

Men don't now have to even bothering lying or outright abusing her to get to her body, and because wanting society to be different isn't the same as society actually being different, the fact that the woman chose to do this and does not herself believe it devalues her does not stop the rest of society applying the same old judgements it always has.

Men are perfectly capable of wanting to fuck someone even though they despise her, and probably because they despise her they get a bigger sexual thrill from degrading her. Remember gang bang style sex with many men and one woman isn't about her sexuality, it's about the sexuality of the men and their bonding experience. They are the people, she is just the playing field.

But even that is not the big con.

The big con is that either way, woman's purpose and social relationships are still being defined by her body and its role in sex, not her unique personality, her own desires and interests or her ability to think. Women who see sex positivity or sex work or body positivity or whatever as empowering women are still falling into the trap of continuing to prioritise things that patriarchy picked out as the important things about women.

REAL "fuck this for a game of soldiers" feminism is to wear comfy clothes, have kids if you want them and have the opportunity, put your focus into a phd in astrophysics, a global business, being a world authority in medieval beans, or whatever you think makes best use of your full set of talents, and have good sex with good people as and when the opportunity arises.

All of this 👏🏻