Herpes Medication found in my husbands bag

[countrysidefields]

I have just found empty packets of tablets from an online pharmacy box dated 17th dec 2024 for anciclovir in my husbands laptop bag.
All the empty packets and packing was also in the box, like it was hidden in there.
When I googled that medication it's used for genital herpes. He doesn't and never has had cold sores.
I am obviously thinking the worst seeing how it was hidden away. Please don't judge me, I wasn't actually looking on purposes, I happened to come across it.
Am I right to be assuming the worst?

Relax. This drug is not just for herpes, but for a wealth of other conditions. Just tell him you came across the packaging and hope it's for nothing serious.

@countrysidefields I hope you’re OK and there’s an innocent explanation. However, if it’s a flare up from contracting the virus (e.g. from catching a cold sore or from sexual partners before you) as PP have said, he’s still out of order for not telling you of the risk.

It’s good you’re getting a blood test yourself as this should (hopefully) rule out the possibility you’ve had the virus without knowing and unwittingly infected him.

Good to take photos so if he disposes of the evidence, you still have proof. But do your photos autosave to a shared drive? If so, he may have seen them and be able to delete them (though obvs not from your phone).

Do you guys think if she asks him he will tell the truth? That he wont be alerted to hide and delete evidence? Terrible advice from many of you im sorry to say. Specially the herpes gaslighters and minimisers. You're very dangerous spreading misinformation. No it isn't just a coldsore or very common. The blood test is worth while. Ughh

Superdrug Online Doctor is where he got in. They sell different pack sizes depending on why you need if.

My view the longer you wait to discuss it the more awkward it will be. Why get a test done when you don’t know?

just casually mention you saw the box but he hadn’t mentioned any issues. Genital herpes or not all possible options have a degree of contagion and I wouldn’t share a bed with someone who has shingles (which is very painful, so I think that option can be ruled out).

Hope you’re ok OP. Whatever happens , we are here for a handhold. Good luck x

I've got v repetitive HSV2 and the blood test isn't reliable. I've had it tested when it shows up that I don't have it when I definitely do.

This medication is not for HIV or syphillis it is only for HSV infections.

I have it on my shoulder btw - never had it on my genitals. Sometimes it can appear on the skin.

A short course would more likely be for an outbreak. I've been on a suppressive dose for years and it's usually at a lower dose.

I was misdiagnosed as shingles for years by 4 different GPs till I went to a private clinic and had the rash swabbed as it was coming back so much.

I would get yourself tested before speaking to him if it were me. Unfortunately it doesn't look good.

Shingles IS caused by the herpes zoster virus. It is a different strain, which is the same one that causes chicken pox usually. However it is from the same herpes virus family that genital herpes is from.

Furthermore, cold sores and genital herpes ARE caused by the same herpes viruses; one can end up on your face or your genitalia or vice versa.

@countrysidefields Your husband could have caught herpes at ANY point in his life, from a kiss off his aunt as a child or through his first sexual experience or any after that. It can then lie dormant for a long time (months and years) and only become active and cause symptoms which require medication periodically. This may be what has happened to your husband and he’s been too embarrassed to tell you for a long time. The other explanation is that in fact he has cheated and this is the first presentation of the virus which requires aciclovir; usually because the first presentation is much more severe than any others that follow.

Herpes can only be passed on when the virus is active which means if you touch the shedding skin or sores currently, then you can also be infected. You may have already been passed the virus and be completely unaware because you have no symptoms. This could have been from your husband or a previous partner(s).

There is no way to know for sure so there’s no point accusing one another, however do check if he’s cheating.

It has been used for both as many people with HIV also have herpes.

Sorry to add to your concerns.
BUT.as alot of empty it might be he been dose you up, prevention better than truth style.
I know that's sinister .I'm sorry. I hope you get answers.

Same as @Mummadeze I caught it from a partner years ago, he had never had an outbreak of genital herpes but did have coldsores......I was tested and it came back positive for type 1 which most commonly causes cold sores.

My guess is your husband has had it for years and hasn't said anything for fear of your reaction as there's such a ridiculous stigma around herpes, but I could be wrong. If that is the case I'm so sorry he hasn't told you in all that time- fwiw I was told by a nurse not to tell prospective partners I had it as, in her words "80% of the population carry one of the two types of herpes virus and you wouldn't announce to a new partner you had coldsores so why would you tell them this". So he may have been told similar when diagnosed?

I did tell my now husband when we got together and he wasn't bothered, we've been together 8 years and he hasn't caught it as far as we're aware. I rarely have outbreaks, maybe two since we've been together. No fuss, I'd rather have it down there than on my face in all honesty.

Really hope it's something straightforward when you do speak to him.

I recently was prescribed this same medication for shingles, 5 times a day was the dose also. There may be other things it is also used for, it's worth asking him tbh. How he reacts will tell you anyway. But as people have said, you can have herpes from a long time ago and it flare up so he's not necessarily done anything wrong. Don't know how old he is but I'm 42 and we never got the jabs that our kids get now against it.

Placemarking as I’m now invested in the outcome.

Edited for ridiculous typo.

if you google herpes uk, there is a support line you can phone for advice if you feel you need it, and there is a lot of helpful advice on their website herpes.org.uk. I work in the nhs, not in this field but I once had a patient in her late 60s who started experiencing herpes flare ups despite having been married for 30+ years, she was advised it can lie dormant in the system for years and then can triggered by another illness or stress, so it doesn’t necessarily mean he has cheated, it agree with PPs that talking to him is essential as he should have told you as it could be a risk to you, although can only be transmitted when in an outbreak I believe.
good luck x

You need to ask him. It’s always going to be at the forefront of your mind until you do. You might not like his response, and I do hope you get the truth, but you need to know.

Oh lovely, you just need to be open with him and hope that he does the same for you. Ask him to be honest as if it is the worst that you are thinking of then you will need to get checked too as Herpes is for life and is worse in most cases for women.
It may be totally innocent though. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and hope it is the latter.
Xx

True, I’ve never been so ill in my life as when I had shingles. I was in agony too and ill for weeks

Brace yourself for this scenario op. If he does admit he’s got genital herpes, fully expect him to say he thinks he must’ve got it from you and accuse you of all sorts. Deflection. Projection. I speak from the bitterest of bitter experience.

hoping there is an innocent explanation for you OP! Xx

I get flare ups of the shingles virus in my facial nerves and my nose. I take acyclovir daily.its a viral suppressant. Not only for genital herpes

@countrysidefields please do not jump to conclusions - if he has had this for a long time, and from the sounds like from all the packets in his laptop bag - he is doing all he can to protect you. Although it's wrong, it's very difficult to tell anyone they have this STI that you can't get rid of. Please hear me out on the below:

I contracted Herpes as a young woman, I was 21 and I was with this guy for 2 years. He was 32 and he should have known better. However when I caught it, I was so scared to approach him as I thought he would say, that I cheated on him - which is what he said - he was extremely possessive and I was a young girl and I had no confidence to fight back so I cut him off and for 4 years, I did not think anyone would want me. So anyone that showed interest, I would leave the room or the venue I was in. It was horrible. In 2011 I met a man who I actually liked and I took the chance in the first instance to tell him about this and he was fine.

I have the type luckily where I have an outbreak once a year (if that) and I did this with any man I met - to be honest I only ever had one guy who said no and that was fine, but he had the choice

anyway, I remember being in Brighton and I met a man who had it too, but he had gone through all his relationships not telling anyone but not having sex with an outbreak - so this always caused tension in his relationships because of the amount of occurrences. The reason he had so many occurrences- was that he was stressed he would have an outbreak. It's very hard for men to talk about this.

Some people have to take the medication all the time as they do have frequent outbreaks and this is called continuous suppression medication which keeps it away and you would not be infected

the virus (like chickpox) lies in the nerves and later turns to shingles when you are unwell as an adult

hence why when someone contracts shingles - if they go near an adult who has never had chickenpox - they will get adult chickenpox which is so so bad

you can only contract the herpes virus if someone is having a breakout and I can assure you if your husband has had this for a long time and taking the tablets all the time - it means he is protecting you

This could mean he has had herpes in the past and is getting the "warning" sufferers may get before an outbreak (tingling, pain) and has antivirals to take to prevent a full outbreak. He could have had an infection before he met you and it can lie dormant until the virus reactivates itself. You need to speak to him.