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Original poster

Herpes Medication found in my husbands bag

740 replies

countrysidefields · 13/01/2025 16:10

I have just found empty packets of tablets from an online pharmacy box dated 17th dec 2024 for anciclovir in my husbands laptop bag.
All the empty packets and packing was also in the box, like it was hidden in there.
When I googled that medication it's used for genital herpes. He doesn't and never has had cold sores.
I am obviously thinking the worst seeing how it was hidden away. Please don't judge me, I wasn't actually looking on purposes, I happened to come across it.
Am I right to be assuming the worst?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
FruminariaBandersnatchiosum · 14/01/2025 18:40

SadlySally · 14/01/2025 13:41

People here have far too much faith. DH just so happens to have stopped having sex with OP around the same time they are secretly taking herpes medication. Regularly does working away which requires a nights stay at a hotel/similar.

“But he might have had shingles and just completely forgot to mention it!”

Lord help us. I’m sorry OP but you have to seriously consider the most realistic outcome.

This.

Entirely.

Every word.

A family member has just discovered that his wife arranged to have an early induction of birth because she felt a flare of genital herpes coming on. This resulted in the baby nearly dying and he knew nothing about her infection.

It explains her sometimes asking him to use condoms and he is considering his entire relationship as a result.

Had she been honest from the outset, he says he would still have stayed with her but this is too much to stomach.

Mummadeze · 14/01/2025 18:41

Hi, I got herpes years ago in a committed relationship and my partner got tested and didn’t have it, and hadn’t ever had it. It was awkward as it looked dodgy but the doctor said I could have been carrying it for years without knowing and I only got an outbreak because I got really run down and ill. I then only had an outbreak once in about 20 years until recently when I started to get them more regularly. I went on Superdrug online to get that medication recently as it was quicker than trying to get an appointment at the doctors and I knew what it was. Between the first outbreak and now I actually had years and years of non protected sex with my partner as he couldn’t catch it unless I was in an outbreak. So maybe he got it before he met you but hasn’t told you because he felt a bit embarrassed. That isn’t great but it doesn’t mean he has cheated.

WeCanOnlyDoOurBest · 14/01/2025 18:42

WilfredsPies · 14/01/2025 18:34

Agreed but, OP, would he not have mentioned it if he got a cold sore for the first time? Or chicken pox? Or shingles? Spouses do tend to mention things like this to each other, surely?

In your position, the very first thing I would do is take a photo of the boxes (with his name on them if it’s there) and exactly where you found them. Then tuck them back inside so you don’t alert him before you need to. Get yourself an urgent appointment at the sexual health clinic. Is there a date on the medication to show when it was issued? If so, start looking at bank statements and phone bills leading up to that date. How IT savvy is he? Would he know how to clear cookies and delete search history?

Then you need to talk to him. Do it when you’re not going to be interrupted and when your DC won’t be able to hear you. Tell him you’ve recently discovered something and if he’s honest with you, you’ll be prepared to listen, but he has one chance, and if he lies to you now, you’ll know, and there will be consequences. Then look at his face.

I’m so sorry OP, it’s bloody shit. I hope it’s something like a cold sore you’ve completely forgotten about.

Show quote history

I don’t think OP needs to go to the Sexual Health Clinic, she said they haven’t been having sex, she’ll be in the clear.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

General health Women's health
Thisismynewname23 · 14/01/2025 18:43

It’s an awful situation for you to be in, I hope you manage to get your test quickly to put your mind at rest, I would get tested for other stds just in case x

Helplessandheartbroke · 14/01/2025 18:45

Sorry op it doesn't look good. I hope hes honest with you

WilfredsPies · 14/01/2025 18:47

WeCanOnlyDoOurBest · 14/01/2025 18:42

I don’t think OP needs to go to the Sexual Health Clinic, she said they haven’t been having sex, she’ll be in the clear.

Show quote history

Yeah, I stopped for a chat mid type, so missed a few updates.

I’d still recommend going though. If it is the worst case scenario, then she doesn’t have any guarantee that it was a one off shortly before the medication was issued.

YowieeF · 14/01/2025 18:49

Why would he go online if it was cold sore or shingles and not his GP.

You need to ask, but be prepared for the worst.

WoolySnail · 14/01/2025 18:51

WilfredsPies · 14/01/2025 18:47

Yeah, I stopped for a chat mid type, so missed a few updates.

I’d still recommend going though. If it is the worst case scenario, then she doesn’t have any guarantee that it was a one off shortly before the medication was issued.

Show quote history

To be fair if he has been sleeping around he could have contracted and passed on other things too that OP doesn't know about. So as you say, best to get checked.

JessicaRabbit6 · 14/01/2025 18:51

Sorry but what man gets something delivered from
a pharmacy for a cold sore or viral
rash. He’s kept it a secret so clearly he had genital
herpes. You don’t just randomly catch this…
OP. Get ready for a rollercoaster. And get your shovel out and start digging.

MarvellousMonsters · 14/01/2025 18:51

I was prescribed this for shingles, and whilst he could've hidden the rash from you (depending on where it is) when I had shingles I felt like absolute crap and was off work for 4 weeks, and I rarely take time off work. So in all honesty I'm not convinced he could've hidden shingles from you, nor can I think of why he'd want to. Confused

Themanfromdelmonte · 14/01/2025 18:53

Have you spoken to him yet? I'm hoping for a genuine 'non sexual' reason!

Ellejay67 · 14/01/2025 18:57

Hollietree · 13/01/2025 16:50

Does he leave him email account logged in? Can you go onto his laptop and search ‘Superdrug’ in his emails?

I know many people will disagree with this. But it’s what I would do.

Me too

Ellejay67 · 14/01/2025 19:04

JHound · 13/01/2025 17:26

You need to speak to him. It could be for a different reason but I cannot imagine anybody hiding shingles or cold sores (despite the latter basically being the same virus as Genital Herpes - Simplex 1 vs. 2

I had similar with an ex (I found his medication in his bathroom cabinet) and so confronted him.

What happened?

PansyP · 14/01/2025 19:05

Isnt it possible he innocently picked up the virus and spots appeared... somewhere... and he panicked and thought "if i tell her she will think ive cheated and caught herpes!!" And so he chose to keep it to himself

PromoJoJo · 14/01/2025 19:08

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at the poster's request.

BoldAmberDuck · 14/01/2025 19:09

There was a lady on here recently with a rash that everyone thought was probably herpes. Neither of them had cheated. General opinion was that her husband had probably had herpes or cold sores years ago and it had lain dormant for years, which CAN happen. Maybe he had a flare up but didn’t want to tell you as it would look suspicious

MrsLouB · 14/01/2025 19:11

I think people need to do their research. HSV ie herpes can be 1 or 2 gential or oral. It can lay dormaint for years and people never have one blister. Sometimes they then get an outbreak, this can be 15-20 years after exposure.

Just becuase OP hasnt sex in 3 months does not mean she has not been exposed, she also may already have it either 1 or 2. This is a skin condition be ir oral or genetial, and people get it even in long term relationships as the person how has it doesnt know!

Clinics wont test you for it unless you have symtoms of it as 90% have the virus hsv 1 and 65% have the hsv 2 either can be oral or genitial.

Yes he has hid it, but he could be ashamed of it and yes hr has done wrong by doing that but sometimes people get scared.

BoldAmberDuck · 14/01/2025 19:11

countrysidefields · 13/01/2025 16:35

@oakleaffy I did think I will get myself checked out, just in case. I will have a look and find somewhere to get booked in. I think it's a good idea to get myself checked although I have never had an symptoms or reasons to think I do have it

You will definitely know if you have it! They will only check for it if u have symptoms as it remains with you for life but occasionally flares up

J3001 · 14/01/2025 19:11

I take this for my eyes

PinkyFlamingo · 14/01/2025 19:13

I think it's obvious by the secrecy and hiding he does have something to hide sorry.

Jayne35 · 14/01/2025 19:17

MarvellousMonsters · 14/01/2025 18:51

I was prescribed this for shingles, and whilst he could've hidden the rash from you (depending on where it is) when I had shingles I felt like absolute crap and was off work for 4 weeks, and I rarely take time off work. So in all honesty I'm not convinced he could've hidden shingles from you, nor can I think of why he'd want to. Confused

I recently had shingles, just a rash on my side, no pain and I wasn’t at all ill, I was prescribed anti viral drugs for it. I think I was lucky though hearing others experiences.

As others have said herpes can lie dormant for years so does not confirm cheating if op’s husband does have that.

FlipFlopVibe · 14/01/2025 19:24

It certainly points more towards sex worker, one or two nights away that are legitimate but he calls someone to the hotel. There will be no text/email trail as they won’t deal in that kind of long term communication. Everything will appear quite normal from your side. Until he catches something that is.

JoanCollinsDiva · 14/01/2025 19:25

A family member has just discovered that his wife arranged to have an early induction of birth because she felt a flare of genital herpes coming on. This resulted in the baby nearly dying and he knew nothing about her infection.

Im sorry but this is bs, no medical professional would induce an early birth risking the baby's life for a suspected herpes outbreak. They'd just give the mum medication and keep an eye on her.

I think your relative is telling porky pies for some reason.

Willyoujustbequiet · 14/01/2025 19:27

It's not my intention to cause you distress but my friend found this medication hidden by her partner.

It turned he had syphilis and HIV from someone he met on a swinging site. He had not disclosed it. He continued to have unprotected sex with my friend the whole time. Fortunately she tested negative for HIV but his lack of remorse was appalling. He was a long term partner.

I think it would be very wise to get tested.

ShalalaIa · 14/01/2025 19:44

countrysidefields · 13/01/2025 16:37

The box was for 45 tablets, taken 3 times a day

Show quote history

That seems a lot? I googled it and found this.

Next Day Aciclovir Tablets | Buy Aciclovir Herpes Tablets

9.0/10 (16173 reviews)
theindependentpharmacy.co.uk has been visited by 10K+ users in the past month
Our genital herpes treatments come in plain, discreet packaging with next-day delivery. Buy prescription herpes treatment online without visiting your GP. Genuine UK medicines.

I don't think Superdrug supply medicine, but it does sound like he's done it online though and maybe just thought he had it?