Herpes Medication found in my husbands bag

[countrysidefields]

I have just found empty packets of tablets from an online pharmacy box dated 17th dec 2024 for anciclovir in my husbands laptop bag.
All the empty packets and packing was also in the box, like it was hidden in there.
When I googled that medication it's used for genital herpes. He doesn't and never has had cold sores.
I am obviously thinking the worst seeing how it was hidden away. Please don't judge me, I wasn't actually looking on purposes, I happened to come across it.
Am I right to be assuming the worst?

Sorry but a clear smear doesn’t mean you haven’t been exposed to HPV, it can lay dormant for decades and become active when you are stressed, your immune system is low, or are going through perimenopause.

Lots of women have clear smears and then one day they don’t, no changes in relationships. Condoms aren’t that effective in protecting against HPV. Not enough information is shared about HPV, most people don’t really know much about it.

It’s for coldsores. I got an online prescription just for my coldsores

Most people with genital herpes have absolutely no idea they carry it. It’s estimated at least 80% of people with it are undiagnosed and don’t realise- either they have no symptoms or just mild ones they don’t notice. They don’t test for it in full std screenings so it’s understandable that most people are none the wiser, but obviously this explains why it’s spread so easily. Some people have pain etc but they are the minority and unlucky.

Truly hoping there is a reasonable explanation and praying you haven't been exposed.

Sorry op it doesn't look good.

Thinking of you.

I take it for coldsores and order it from Superdrug online. It is used for other things but Superdrug only prescribe it for coldsores and genital herpes.

Sending best wishes, hope all goes well.

Don’t instantly jump to any conclusions. The virus can remain in the body dormant for very long periods of time. It is possible he may have caught it before he started a relationship with you and has since had an attack and got the Acyclovir to deal with it. If this is indeed the case he may be too embarrassed to mention it to you. How do I know? Simple this happened to me and the virus didn’t present itself for years. Now I rarely get an attack but do generally when I am particularly stressed. Talk this through with him do not instantly presume he has been unfaithful.

Absolute bullshit. Knock off the scaremongering. This virus is embarrassing and can remain dormant in the body for years until it presents itself. It is very hard for some people to talk about because of the stigma attached to suffering with genital Herpes. You are shit stirring without knowing facts. I would suggest you shut up trying to harm someone’s marriage with your bollocks is not a good look.

It could be only for cold sores - but even so, if he had a cold sores coming up he’d have to let you know so you don’t kiss. My cold sores are horrendous and that’s why I prefer to take the tablets too.

This + not having much sex to be honest yes, would make me pause. I think you have reason for suspicions but you’d still have to talk to him about it.

@countrysidefields good luck talking to your husband. Also worth pointing out (which may already have been) that you could ask him to see the email receipt from superdrung or online Dr's request to show you that it's innocent, if that's what he claims.

But again I agree with others, it's odd not to have told you about it and hidden the boxes if it wasn't genital herpes. And that if he had it before, he should have disclosed that to you because of a flare up and the risk of passing it on.

Sorry, i meant to quote that one!

Op you haven’t said much about the lack of sex? but I think that is really important! Is it all him? Is it both of you? Massive red flag in a relationship that something isn’t quite right unless you are actively talking about why?

I mean, it does look awful Op and I'm sorry you're facing this.

Could it be that he's had herpes since before you met? From my understanding you can go YEARS without an outbreak - so he's hidden it from you, had a flare up and avoided sex for a while until he was "in the clear" again?

Either way he's lied to you which is terrible but potentially recoverable?

Has he avoided sex for long stretches before?

I just don't know how you would know for sure what the truth is - which must be torturous.

On Superdrug on line pharmacy you do have to upload photos
I have an account I just went through the form as if I have herpes and you can’t complete the form unless you upload 2 photos

some on line pharmacies don’t require a picture but Superdrug do

I can't believe people are still suggesting cold sores, eye herpes or shingles - even if her dh had for some reason decided not to tell his wife about these, unless she is visually impaired she would have SEEN it!

Thanks again for all the messages. I am at work today and am taking the time to think this all through but we will have time tonight when we are on our own so I plan to talk to him then to find out what's going on.

Not much of an update just didn't want to not reply again after all the new posts. Thanks for all your kind words

I had my first every outbreak of shingles last year, they said it could have been due to stress. Anyone who has had chicken pox can have a shingles outbreak as it is a virus that lives dormant in your body and can sometimes be triggered (such as by stress or illness). I didn't go to my doctor, I went in to a chemist and asked to speak to a pharmacist. The pharmacist diagnosed it as shingles and gave me a box of high strength aciclovir (800mg if I remember correctly). I didn't need to see a doctor or pay for it (I am in Wales not sure if the rules are different elsewhere in the UK).

Hope this helps and there is an innocent explanation 💐

If it was a cold sore, he may not mention it as it’s very minor. But as OP has not seen any cold sores, this sounds unlikely. If it was shingles I would very much struggle to believe a husband would hide this from his wife. There’s just no world i can invision in which you keep shingles secret. For what purpose!?

I’m sorry OP, but I would think long and hard about how to approach this with him. Especially as you’ve not been having sex for the last while, he’s clearly not wanting to transfer something. The issue then becomes where he got it from. If he’s doing the odd overnight due to work my suspicion would be sex workers before an outright affair.

If it’s all innocent, fair enough, but I would expect the proof of this to be handed over happily, without a defensive reaction. If he got this prescription online can he show you the report he made to get it?

I think when it quacks like a duck...

Dh gets cold sores and has always been open about it - I mean, they are pretty obvious anyway. I'm not sure why someone would lie about that and if he's never had a history of them why would one suddenly spring up after 20-odd years of marriage? Same with shingles, why would someone hide the fact they had it? Also it would be difficult, it's a painful rash and is contagious.

The most likely answer is its genital herpes and if he hasn't caught them from you then...?

He will most likely deny and obfuscate if you confront him so be prepared for that. Sorry 💐

Also, if it was a simple cold sore on the lip surely he would buy the cream over the counter, that's what dh does? You don't need a prescription. Why go to that trouble of filling in online forms and taking a course of medication for a cold sore?

It doesnt add up.

Can I ask why you don't just use the over the counter cream instead of taking tablets? You can buy it in boots etc and dh usually only has to use it for a day or two when he feels the tingle and it never appears. Surely that's much better than ingesting tablets?