Suddenly single - would you date again in your 50s

[colinthedogfromaccounts]

I have been idly musing. If DH were to leave me there is no way of knowing for sure, but I highly doubt I would want another partner.

I cannot imagine starting over - all the uncertainty and compromise. For me it wouldn't be worth it. Also, I am not a person who relishes company 24/7.

Wondering if this is more the norm these days?

@Disturbia81 very true!

Christ no, I'd just get more cats. I'm mid-40s.

The OH and I were very young (early 20s) when we got together and have kind of grown up together, which means we're probably a lot more tolerant of each other's foibles than of others (and of how others would tolerate us!).

I do, however, have a great network of friends and family and also enjoy my own space and company, so remaining alone would work best for me.

As long as I don't have to make any actual effort or give up any of my own space, yeah sure

No way. Married 40 years this year and much as I love him, I’d be perfectly happy alone and could never live with anyone else.
Friendship and separate houses, perhaps.

I know a fair amount of married men who have secret relationships with women , and I feel heartsore for their wives who are running the show at home, making these men look like loyal husbands and fathers, when actually they are selfish and immature and liars. The older I get, the less interested I am in coupledom.

I met DP shortly after I turned 50. However, I'd been single for over 15 years. We've been together coming up for 4 years but we don't live together and that works really well for us. We each have our own space but do lots of nice things together and are also there for each other in a crisis or when needed. He is a few years younger than me (for all those out there who resolutely believe that if you are older it is only geriatrics who will want to date you) and is both financially and physically in a good state of repair! I'd say we are both very self-sufficient and independent and I think that is also what works for us at this stage of life.

I do think that as you get older we get a bit less flexible (mentally and physically 😉) and our dating and companionship needs are vastly different from when we were younger. However, my life is definitely better with DP in it and I'm very glad I stuck with online dating and met him.

I'll give that a miss

I could not be assed with all that multi dating / having to wait to be asked to be someone's GF/ talking stages/ situation-ships!

No thanks.

Eh, no!
Maybe they should've went for one first off to avoid a relationship breakdown!

Not quite sure what you are saying no to. It happens.

Some women discover things about themselves as life goes on. With most people, Heterosexuality is an assumed default during upbringing.

I'm really sorry to hear that. I can completely understand why you don't want to get involved again.

Yeah, it all sounds very complicated these days

I'm in my 50s and been single for several years. Hypothetically I might be up for it, but in reality I never meet anyone I view as more than a friend. I seriously doubt I will meet anyone who I feel that strongly about.

Sex and that close friendship that you get from someone you deeply share a life with. A dog can't give you that.

It might not be for you, but lets not pretend that its not obvious why some women would want it.

One would hope

I was 37 when dh died after being together since teens so 19yrs

Def didn't want to spend the next 50yrs alone

Met dh 2 and been together 12yrs but now separated last year and 51

I'm not ready to meet someone now but also can't imagine being on own for another 30yrs +

I have amazing friends and see them a lot but isn't the same

So yes never say never

This

You worded it better then me

😂

I heard a man in his who was 80 talk about how he married a woman his age. He said, 'I know people think that at our age we married for companionship, but we didn't, we fell in love.'

I think that is lovely and inspiring.

They were emigrating to her country of origin, New Zealand 😊

I'm 40 and have zero interest in a relationship as I know it's highly unlikely I'll meet my dream man.

Often think of this, it’s a no from me, I wouldn’t bother with a man but might consider my later life with another woman.

Absolutely no chance, I'm 54 and all I want is to be left alone mostly. What I have right now works well for me. But if current DP was to leave or die I'm getting a female lodger 5 days and have my weekends free and another dog.

It's just far too much trouble to start all over again. I'd miss sex, but I could get sex if I really wanted to, ons are still a thing. And online dating leaves me cold, I prefer a more organic way of meeting people.

Not one man has made my head turn in probably 20 years, and the more I find out about fetishes and porn usage and Paraphillias and the like, the less inclined I am to want a man.

When I got divorced, I had no intention of getting involved again, soo many of my friends are happily single in their 50s. Fate, however, had other plans..

Yeah what's with all the fetishes and obsessions..

Porn addled. I'm not a prude, but I don't like the idea of being choked in the middle of sex, websites like

https://wecantconsenttothis.uk/

Make me think twice and again about relationships

All the other stuf means it is just not worth it. I already have very good friends and from a quick trawl through here and the knowing the experiences of friends, I'm not putting myself through that. So I'll stick with the companionship of a canine. Experience over hope in my case.

@Bodeganights Definitely so much is because of porn.
But even before that.. men having obsessions with their type, red heads eg or foot fetishes, bondage, public wanking etc.