Suddenly single - would you date again in your 50s

[colinthedogfromaccounts]

I have been idly musing. If DH were to leave me there is no way of knowing for sure, but I highly doubt I would want another partner.

I cannot imagine starting over - all the uncertainty and compromise. For me it wouldn't be worth it. Also, I am not a person who relishes company 24/7.

Wondering if this is more the norm these days?

Nope!

I might see someone on a casual basis if I met someone I liked but I wouldn’t actively look for a relationship.
if I found myself wanting sex I might seek out someone appropriate for that maybe a fwb type situation.

I would definitely never marry or live with anyone!

I don’t think I’d ever want something serious even. I could maybe at most do a low stress, see someone a couple of times a month with not constantly texting in between type of thing maybe the occasional weekend break.

I'd like to have someone to take care of yard work and house maintenance, but I think the cons of a spouse/partner exceed the pros, especially at my age (68). I really like having my own place and my own things, with no man causing problems and making a mess.

Late 50s - I would go speed dating and aim for some fun dates and sex. But I wouldn’t want to share my space and time on a permanent basis.

I’m nearly 66 get told I look a lot younger. I dated in my 50’s had 2 relationships. Don’t want to marry again or live with someone. Recently retired I like my own company have friends family but I like dating as well. If it leads to something long term that’s fine if it’s what both parties want. Im older not dead. Each to their own I’ve known people in their 30’s divorce & not date again. We are all different.

My best friend died in her mid 40s. Her husband - who had nursed her for years - remarried a woman about the same age as him when he was in his early 50s. They're now in their mid-60s and gloriously happy.

I'm nearly 65. Was widowed 4 yrs ago. I don't see myself ever dating again - I don't think that I could go through it all again.

On the the other hand, my husband's ex is currently with Man No. 4.

Her affair partner died suddenly. Less than a year later she was with a widower. They were happy but he died. Less than a year later she was with another widower. Both in their 80s when they got together. I hear that they're still together and happy enough.

My marriage ended 18 months ago.

For the last 10 months I’ve been seeing someone, he’s absolutely wonderful. I am not in a hurry to live together, if ever. I’m 56, he’s 53.

My sister remarried after being widowed a widower that she met at a writing group. Everyone was surprised, she was in her late sixties. Seems happy. I don’t like the thought of evenings alone all the time. I reckon I would get a midweek lodger, so some company but not all the time plus rent gained is up to I think 6k PA without paying tax.

I don't think I could contemplate it (early 50s). Several women I know have been widowed in the last few years and I've been surprised that they have all moved on to new partners. Even my very traditional mother met a new partner a couple of years after being widowed at 70.

I'm 53, single for 2 years (I was with my ex for 20 years and left him as he became increasingly abusive) and also have a man on the horizon who's an old friend from many years ago! He's interested too and is absolutely lovely. Good looking, funny, thoughtful, bright, no weird baggage, safe, reliable, good company blar blar blar but I also don't want sex or to share a bed or want to hold hands and be romantic. I'm good on my own and just want to be ugly and old in private and mostly left alone in peace!

Same, my parents were married 50 years and when my mum died, my dad met someone
They've been together a couple of years now, don't live together but are very happy

I’m happily married but as I have gotten older i realise that I am a better mother than I am a partner. So while i wouldn’t want another partner, i would be happy with a bunch of stepkids

Finally managed to shake off the incubus of 25 years, and met the perfect man at the age of 50. We adore each other, the sex is mind-blowing, we're best friends, confidants and lovers. 25 years so far and going strong.

I’m in my sixties, happily married for just over thirty years. I’m content in my own company and enjoy doing stuff on my own, but it would be nice to have someone to do nothing special with during down time ifyswim and I still enjoy sex. So someone who lived around the corner would be good.😀

But it would be hard to find someone who is as good a fit (not just like that 😀) as my dh tbh,

But if you don’t want to see someone all of the time, you can’t really demand exclusivity can you? And the thought of sleeping with a man who is possibly sleeping with other women would give me the ick so maybe it wouldn’t work!

I am 55 and have been single for 10 years. I wouldn't want to 'date' but would like a companion for holidays etc - although I have lots of friends to share that with too. The thought of sharing my bed and bathroom with someone now - ugh

I'd rather live alone though. If I lived with a friend I'd just resent them for being in my space.
But if this suits you both, it's a great plan!

I have been married for over 25 years and solo travelling for that time, too. I don't only solo travel- I also travel with DH- but travelling on your own is great!

I would date, l would certainly have sex, but l would not live with anyone.

No I wouldn't (in fact I haven't). I was widowed at 47 and haven't had another relationship since. I am 64 now. 17 years is a long time and it's unlikely to happen now.
If someone I liked had come along ten years or so ago possibly I would have, but I never went looking or tried OLD. Was too busy working and looking after my DC. I had a close male friend until 4 years ago when he died; but we were good friends, nothing more.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo

No. I’ve been with my now partner for 7 years, but prior to getting together with him I’d already decided that I couldn’t be bothered anymore…it was only for the fact that I’d know him since my late teens, liked him, and knew there wouldn’t be any nasty surprises (like in every other relationship I’d ever had!) that we got together. I’m so glad we did because I love him to bits, but if something happened, no, I wouldn’t look for another relationship. Him being wonderful hasn’t changed the fact that every other man I’ve been involved with definitely was NOT, and in my opinion it’s just not worth the effort and heartache.

@Ruslandgirl I completely agree, too busy to add something else in. Work is busy, parenting two teenagers alone is a huge priority.

I did a PhD post divorce, in four years while working full time in a SLT role - wouldn’t have done that in my marriage.

Kids, work, PhD, life/running a home, couple of hobbies I can dip in and out of = definitely no time for a relationship for years, plus I really couldn’t be arsed.

My DC are 18 and 20 now so need me less but I still cba.

I would get a dog instead.

I'm 45. I recently looked on some of the Online sites at guys my age...

Imagine a Wedding Buffet that's been open since 6pm but it's now 11pm...
Slim Pickings and anything that looks even remotely ok is probably going off in the middle...

😂🤣

Which would suggest there are men out there if you want one (assuming you're a nurse)?