I need to be honest with my friend and admit that her 50th birthday outing will be too much for me, but feel bad saying it!

[Winterysun]

I'm only two years older than her, am sociable, enjoy going out and I work - BUT I also need 'recharge' time, as I'm more introverted than her.

The planned day is Disneyland Paris, which will mean getting on a coach at 6 am, arriving mid-morning and not getting home until midnight/1 am. I've done Disneyland Paris before when my children were young, and loved it but we stayed for long weekends, rather than rushing around in a day!

I've done similar things before, but feel wiped out by the afternoon after such an early start, and with a lively group I won't have that 'chill time' to get my energy back for the evening (meal & probably a lot to drink)!

I'd love to still celebrate with her, ie, theatre, lunch & sightseeing, local restaurant etc but don't want to disappoint her! Would any of you admit you don't fancy it, or go anyway and possibly struggle to keep up?

Fuck no you don't 😂

I'm 38 and taking out the Disney Land element (that I would never do even if you paid me) I would not be able to deal with a 20 hour day where I'm expected to be on the go and cheerful about it because it's someone's birthday for 20.solid.hours.

No fucking way.

funnily enough people of all ages enjoy different things. But you just had to have a little sneer there didn’t you?

Never be able to get my head around adults who go to Disney without kids.

I'm 42 I couldn't do it simply because it sounds stupid. You'll get there mid morning, so will lose any advantage of being there early, the rides will be full, you'll get a chance to go on one before you want lunch, maybe one after lunch and then go home.

Why not go to a UK theme park? Or stay over so you can make the most of a full day in the park?

This sounds like fucking insanity. DLP is hellish and exhausting enough as it is, rude people, pushing, shoving, half the park closed, technical issues. It's just not magic.

Nor me. It was horrific enough doing it with the kids. I don’t know any adults that would willingly put themselves through it.

Have you been?

I’m doing an extreme day trip to DLP in 10 days for my 50th birthday.

I’m going with my husband though and we’re flying.

I wouldn’t do it as part of a big group on a coach though- too much travelling time.

id consider flying OP - DLP is only 10
minutes on the train from Charles de Gaulle..

Cheap flights, no need for a hotel. It's a day out.

This is nuts, where are you going from? It takes many hours to drive to DLP. It sounds horrible.

I don't think I was ever young enough to do this. LOL.

I wouldn't be going to Disneyland anyway! It's not my idea of a fun day out and I'm nowhere near 50!

I think it's perfectly fine to say you don't want/can't go. For whatever reason. But you have a decent one.

"getting on a coach at 6 am, arriving mid-morning and not getting home until midnight/1 am"

That's an insane plan. I would be bowing out of trhat.

I'd do it! But go the day before and book a hotel for 1 or 2 nights so you're just there for Disney and the meal. Skip the bus trip!

But she must know this about you if she’s your friend? I’m surprised she’s not said I’ll understand if it’s too much, that’s what my group of friends would do with various people in the group. What will she do if you tell her the truth? She’s not going to physically assault you and if she’s off with you it’s a good way to know she’s not a good friend. I would be thinking though about what I can do to make it work and sharing that with her.

I think it sounds hellish and I love Disney and visited Disneyland parks around the globe in my 50th year.

A 6am coach would mean trying to get to that destination before any public transport starts -expensive!

Am overnight at a non Disney hotel would make it much more pleasant. £100 extra maybe, less if you share rooms. And the far more time at Disney in that one day.

Sounds awful. Just say ‘no’.

I misread and thought your friend had bought you this trip for YOUR birthday. Are you the only person invited, or is there a group? I'm younger than you and that would completely draining too! 18hrs away all day and night- I'd be knackered the next day too and I have no medical issues!

If she has others going along, why not get tickets and take her to the theatre, restaurant in the UK etc instead? Unless you do want to go and either just have a coffee in the afternoon or stay 1-2 nights.

I thought a coach to Paris would take a lot longer than leaving at 6am & arriving mid/late morning?

While I understand the challenge for you and it wouldn't be my first choice for a day out, I would make it work. By making it work I would make sure I took my needed break on the day. I wouldn't make a big deal about it before hand but on the day, I'd just say " I really need a sit down but don't let that stop you, I'll give you a call and find you in a bit"
Having said all that, it's a democracy, and you can suggest doing something together that is different!
Another thing I always do is weigh up the financial cost but that may not be an issue for you

Well, I’ve been.
With kids. I wouldn’t dream of going back without young kids.
Or even with, tbh 😁

By 'recharge', I don't sleep in the day, no! I find just sitting for half hour with a coffee can refresh me, or on a coach, gazing out the window. Or even sat in the park, people watching before going back to the group.
you can do all of this on this trip, you'll be on a. coach there , can have lunch/coffee in park, coach back
I'm sorry but you talk as if you're 90 not 52!
It's one day.

If as you say, you think you would struggle with it, in your position I would explain this to your friend, and as you suggest do something else just the two of you.

If money isn’t an issue I would do what someone up tread suggested fly there and stay in a hotel , meet friend for lunch , leave

or just plan an treat for her and you here and tell the absolute truth - sounds an expensive and stressful day out , I hate group trips as I just people please all day and feel resentful later

I once went on hell ish hen party that was meeting at 10am standing in pub for 4 hours , meal, then clubbing … thank god I had small baby at home and got out of half of that ! Bride was young and childless so didn’t have a clue how knackered a mum can get