Ok would it be desperate to text the man I sat next to on the plane?

[KeiraBlackDove]

Ok, name changed for this as I'm a 48 year old woman behaving like a teenager 🙈.

I sat next to an extremely handsome 6 foot 5 Canadian man on flight to Toronto a couple of weeks ago. He saw me my pen didn't work so let me borrow his and we got chatting.

Turns out he is a consultant Dr in the UK and was returning home to visit his elderly parents. We chatted so easily for hours and he told me he had helped organise a tour of Toronto and local areas for a dr he worked with so knew lots of nice places to visit. He showed me the itinerary he made for them on his phone and gave me his number in case I had any questions about the city whilst there. He didn't ask for my number.

He is a real dr as I've checked him out on LinkedIn 🙈 and Facebook, hopefully anonymously.

I messaged him when I returned to London to thank him for his hints and tips. He replied immediately and said he had hoped to see me in Toronto!

After a few texts back and forward he asked me to meet him for drink when one day when I returned from France - I was there with work - and he sent me a 'xx'.
A week passed and he didnt message! So I messaged him to follow on some chat we had. He immediately sent me a voicenote, said I was great to hear from me and tnat he had a couple of long shifts coming up but he would call me. He texted over the next l couple of days later to ask how I was doing and tnat he was on his shift but would be off this week and he would call me to meet.

5 days have passed and no message from him again! Should I just delete his no now? I know he was off this week and had no plans for NY so it would have been nice to have met.

Definitely message him.

What's the worst that can happen? You message and he doesn't reply/you find out he's not actually single. At least then you'll know and can forget him.

Now what's the best that can happen? You message and he replies with a reasonable reason for not being in touch sooner (maybe he's also asking his mates/strangers that live in his phone should he message you!) You meet him and have a wonderful time and are together forever as soul mates 💛 (yeah ok but I did say best thing lol)

What have you got to lose really? Message him!

OP I just had a thought… did you set your profile to private when you looked up his on Linkedin

Def message him!! If he mucks you about then just block!!

I’ve looked up a few doctors when I have been deciding who to choose for various treatments and they often have a little write up with qualifications , experience, marital status, children hobbies etc. It may be worth doing a bit more research before messaging.
I wouldn’t message though.

That was my point ages ago about getting caught on linkedin ( I know ppl who have been caught out )

This is a thought-provoking take and I do see where you are coming from now, but for me it's still a death by a thousand cuts scenario. When a man patently isn't interested – and this man has had ample opportunity to ask OP out and still hasn't, so I am putting him firmly in that category – chasing him again will be just another chip away at OP's self esteem. Why do that to herself? She'd be far better of emboldening herself by saying "next" and moving on, because being dignified is one of the most powerful traits a woman can display. To suggest she should just throw her dignity in the gutter because the bloke was a bit good-looking makes me despair.

Definitely message him and see if he wants to meet up for a NYE drink

You will regret it for the rest of your life if you don't!!

Agree about the "death by a thousand cuts" to the self esteem. I've wasted lots of time with/thinking about men who were plainly not that bothered about me, just because they were good looking.

Quite cathartic to admit that actually (anonymously of course)

So I looked at his LinkedIn from my laptop which isn't logged into LinkedIn so I saw a summary profile only - there was no picture, maybe because I wasn't signed in.

His Facebook photo looks old and he only seems about have about 50 friends.

Other than the medical research papers and winning some medical obs/gyn prize there is literally nothing else about him on the internet.

Honestly, what have a I become 🤦‍♀️. Now wondering if he is married. Ughh wish I'd never messaged to start off with.

Agree. Self-esteem is everything. Chasing after a man who isn’t interested is bad for your self-esteem and risks damaging your mental health. It’s the mental equivalent of smoking a cigarette!

My best friend net her guy in an even more movie-esque sryle story, a lovely woman in her 40s so…. Maybe just move on if you don’t like the OP:

It has nothing to do with ‘liking the OP’

But much more to do with facing reality

Troll hunting isn't allowed. If you think it's fake, report it.

It’s not troll hunting

It’s men telling women tales

What? You are troll hunting. It’s not allowed. They’ll delete your posts but if you don’t stop then you’ll get banned.

Why did you need a pen on the plane, OP?

Dont listen to these women begging you to preserve your dignity. What for ?
🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Thats a very odd question. To write? To work? To do a puzzle? A pen is pretty near the top of my plane “need to pack” list because of all the things you need a pen for.

All this wrangling is not helping you. Rip the plaster off quick!
Just get it over with and message him already.
As I said before, block and delete if he doesn’t follow through.
it’s not desperate to go for what you want.
He’s a busy Doctor, so it’s very likely that he may have been called upon to take up additional shifts over the Christmas period. See what he comes back with (or not) and go from there. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

MNrs believing the story that a 48 yr old woman is going to be swept off her feet by wait for it…..6’5, handsome, unattached, well traveled, Doctor. With a meet cute that sees him handing over a pen, after he noticed hers wasn’t working, on a Xmas flight to London, which then saw them talk for hours and hours……

You've said you don't believe the OP's story. Not just that you just don't believe what the bloke said.

uh huh….because men say these things often and women and clearly MNrs fall for it