Ok would it be desperate to text the man I sat next to on the plane?

[KeiraBlackDove]

Ok, name changed for this as I'm a 48 year old woman behaving like a teenager 🙈.

I sat next to an extremely handsome 6 foot 5 Canadian man on flight to Toronto a couple of weeks ago. He saw me my pen didn't work so let me borrow his and we got chatting.

Turns out he is a consultant Dr in the UK and was returning home to visit his elderly parents. We chatted so easily for hours and he told me he had helped organise a tour of Toronto and local areas for a dr he worked with so knew lots of nice places to visit. He showed me the itinerary he made for them on his phone and gave me his number in case I had any questions about the city whilst there. He didn't ask for my number.

He is a real dr as I've checked him out on LinkedIn 🙈 and Facebook, hopefully anonymously.

I messaged him when I returned to London to thank him for his hints and tips. He replied immediately and said he had hoped to see me in Toronto!

After a few texts back and forward he asked me to meet him for drink when one day when I returned from France - I was there with work - and he sent me a 'xx'.
A week passed and he didnt message! So I messaged him to follow on some chat we had. He immediately sent me a voicenote, said I was great to hear from me and tnat he had a couple of long shifts coming up but he would call me. He texted over the next l couple of days later to ask how I was doing and tnat he was on his shift but would be off this week and he would call me to meet.

5 days have passed and no message from him again! Should I just delete his no now? I know he was off this week and had no plans for NY so it would have been nice to have met.

I'd never chase a man. If he is interested he will message you.

What about his wife?

Good luck, OP. I hope you manage to meet up with him. Keep us posted.

What’s the worst that can happen if you message him?

Those people saying he’s probably married actually have no idea whether he is or isn’t and we could say that about someone you meet in a bar!

Just message him. Then you know either way and you aren’t left wondering. Just the one message, don’t send more.

Message him, he's a Dr and they get very busy.

Do it! No time like the present.

As other PPs have pointed out, do you even know if he is single? If he’s such a great catch I doubt he would be, the good ones tend to be snatched up.

This sounds like a made for tv movie

If you leave it to NY it will be further small talk and back and forth. Just msg him now and ask if he is free to meet and see how it goes. Don't torture yourself with waiting games.

can you google him and see if he's married? please do a proper research on this man before going bonkers, it will save you lots of trouble.

Oooo I am INVESTED!!

Message him. Why not?

So many people including Drs are down with the flu right now

I would message him with a reason to meet eg "I'm going to X on Sunday if you fancy joining". You've got nothing to lose.

I think there's nothing to lose by messaging him. He told you he wanted to see you for a drink. So he sounds interested. However, when a guy has been interested, they've made that clear to me and I've never had to chase. So I don't know. Maybe he's shy, been busy, playing hard to get or isn't very interested. I think just give it one shot and if it doesn't work out then you'll easily move on.

If he likes you, he will message.

You've initiated contact twice - it's on him now. He's a doctor, he's not being held hostage. He could message you from the loo if he wanted to - and he would if he was keen.

My advice would be to forget him and if he contacts you in the future it will be a nice surprise. Your NOT contacting him won't stop him getting back in touch, in the unlikely event he has caught a lurgy that causes his fingers to drop off.

I would give it one more text - nothing to lose! But make sure you are not doing all the chasing!

Life is short and he's obviously really busy - good luck!!

Oh god - im such a wuss!

Thanks for all of your replies!

He definitely implied he was single - he likes travelling, often travels alone, was hoping to travel somewhere for NY but hadn't decided where. Sounded single but you never know.

I've googled an other than his Facebook which is private, his linked in and some medical research papers he has coauthored I can't see anything about him at all. Ughh

@KeiraBlackDove
Whatever happens, please will you come back and let us know?
I'm very invested in your thread, and have my popcorn out already!
(And if nothing comes of it, please don't be too shy to tell us - I think we've all been there.......well I have, certainly).

Men will always ask you if they’re interested - they find the time to ask a woman out if they want to. Give it one more shot and be direct about meeting up, but if it’s another mañana response then delete him.

Yes I have dated a couple of doctors who would send selfies and message to make evening plans from work, if they want to talk, they will make time.

I’d message one more time along the lines of ‘Hope you had a good Christmas as far as possible with work, it would be nice to meet up in the NY if you are free and interested in doing that.’ If he doesn’t respond within a few weeks, block, delete and accept it wasn’t meant to happen.

As a side note you don’t actually know that he hasn’t got family in the UK OP. Was he visiting parents /siblings in Canada? Doesn’t mean he hadn’t got wife/girlfriend/kids in UK!! How long has he been in the UK for?

He sounds delish, and a Canadian and a doctor as well, it’s unlikely he’s been single for long/will stay single/is even single but fingers crossed for you!

This is my view.

If it was me, I would have already messaged again and not asked Mumsnet but this has never worked out for me longer than getting a first date.
He's not sitting there wondering if he should message you or not. If he wants to, he will.

What have you got to lose?! Give it one more shot.