Is there a thread for those having a crap Christmas yet? ☹️

[darkmodereactivated]

If not then I’ll start one.

Baby’s first Christmas, DH is an excellent dad and I couldn’t have asked more from him over the last three months. D(?)M has a few drinks and decides to criticise his parenting skills, how he rocks the baby of all things. She refuses to apologise when asked, then doubles down and mocks him verbally and with gestures. It was horrible.

DH hurt, upset and angry. He wants an apology and says she’s not welcome in this house any more. DF disgusted by her behaviour and has been considering an Uber home in the morning. I’m piggy in the middle and have spent £250 on food etc. We have a velcro baby and it has been such a tall order trying to get house ready and was so looking forward to an amazing time.

Tomorrow morning DM definitely won’t apologise, likely she won’t actually remember the half of what happened. Even if we fake having a good day it won’t be true enjoyment, and I am gutted that this is what we are all going to remember of our baby’s first Christmas. What a shit show.

Solidarity to anyone else whose Christmas has been ruined

tomorrow is another day. Steel yourself to be kickass polite and jovial all day and see if you can have some lovely moments with your dc and DH despite it all.

That was very much like my baby’s first Christmas too. We had a year long break from them.

you will need to back up DH. Tell your mother to apologise or leave. My relationship with my partner was severely impacted by his failure to stand up to his mother. Don’t do that to him when you have a new baby. You are a team. I’d tell DF to get rid of his wife and he is very welcome to forget about her and have a nice Christmas.

your mother is a raging bitch because everyone enables her and appeases her. Just because it’s Christmas it doesn’t give her a pass to be a nasty cow to your husband.

It's about time your DH stood up to your mother and good for him he did. If she has forgotten about it by morning then fine go ahead as usual But don't invite her again. Why should people put up with this mean behaviour in their own home. Or if she decides to leave don't stop her. You can't control other people's behaviour but you can control how you respond to it.

It’s his special first Christmas with your baby too. He shouldn’t have to tolerate being bullied in his own home by a drunk arsehole.

You’re not stuck in the middle. You stick up for your lovely husband and agree with your dad that it’s best they go before she ruins your day. Your husband is the victim and deserves your unequivocal support. So what if she doesn’t remember?! Everyone else will.

D(?)M has a few drinks and decides to criticise his parenting skills, how he rocks the baby of all things. She refuses to apologise when asked, then doubles down and mocks him verbally and with gestures. It was horrible.

I’d have called a taxi for her at this point of she wouldn’t apologise. There is no way in hell anyone would be sleeping in my home who was rude to either DH or I. Send her home and enjoy Christmas just the three of you OP.

My CO alarm went off an hour ago so had to call 999 who have organised for the emergency gas team to come out. I'm now standing outside my house with the doors and windows wide open, in the freezing cold and rain. Think it's just a faulty alarm but can't turn boiler on or use hob until it's been checked, so house will be freezing tomorrow and can't cook anything! Yay!

To top it all, DS has seen that Father Christmas has been well before he was due and the mince pies etc and mulled wine has been consumed, so the magic is now well and truly broken!

It's my birthday today and 2 of us are down with D&V, not sure how tomorrow will go at all.

To confirm, I absolutely stuck up for my DH! I told DM she was being critical and unkind, I told her she needs to apologise etc. I reiterated that DH is an excellent dad and husband and that what she saying wasn’t true. But she was drunk so wasn’t having any of it. Saying nonsense like everyone is entitled to their opinion and that was hers. As you know there is no reasoning with someone who’s had a few.

She absolutely is not being invited again.

Oh no @sanityisamyth. Could you say that you were hungry and stressed so you had them but that you’ll leave some more out for him…?

Oh @TotallyKerplunked that is rubbish. I had D&V a couple of weeks ago and wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I’m sorry you’re feeling so unwell and on your birthday too. Could you postpone the celebrations for a few days?

He's now 10 so about time the magic was broken, but not being able to beat the house or cook anything tomorrow is slightly more of a challenge 🙈

People like this need a firm hand.My lovely friend had a dreadful mother. She was unkind when my friend was pregnant with her first child and upset her. Her mild mannered Dh rang his MIL up and said if she ever says one more unkind thing to either of them ever again the relationship is over and she will never see any child of theirs. Good as gold for the last 18 years.

I would say she apologies and doesn’t drink or she leaves first thing.

My 1.5yo has just this evening spiked a temp, although not too unwell himself, we were planning to go to in laws for dinner tomorrow and one of the guests has just started chemo so we absolutely can’t go now. Looks like me and the baby at home while DH and 4yo go to his parents for dinner (I don’t want 4yo to miss out as she’s very excited to see all her cousins and have dinner at granny and grandads house). Luckily they live 5 minutes away so maybe I’ll get a plate sent over.

That’s really mean. I don’t think much point in forcing a fake apology but first thing tomorrow a quick word with her (away from DH but with your dad there) saying she either apologises this instant with sufficient sincerity, or her cab will be here shortly. No discussion, and follow through. Enjoy your Xmas xx

DH has flounced after a row, so I’ve had to do the presents, supper, Rudolph’s carrot and mince pie, note from Santa etc. Just tucked my (terminally ill) DM into bed and opened some good wine.

Tomorrow will be hard because DS8 is autistic and on a strict beige diet. If I’m lucky he’ll eat a couple of pigs in blankets and a bowl of gravy, as long as they don’t touch each other.

If I see one more “joyous Christmas with my perfect family” SM post, I may punch myself in the face.

Chin-chin. 🍷

Our Christmas is cancelled, for sad reasons that I won't go into.

Not sure what to say but I hope u have someone to help u through ur sadness

@iwishihadaname Awww, thank you! Yes, DP is with me.

Oh crap!
Anywhere you can go to eat? Or have you got an air fryer?

I'm on my own for Christmas and if a neighbour asked I would happily lend my oven/air fryer/kitchen

Luckily just myself and adult Dd this year so quite one. But just had a big back spasm and luckily I know how to stretch it out but now my back is sore so I'll most likely have a quiet day

So sorry to hear that. Thinking of you 💞

DS1(13) up since 4 with D&V, smaller ones up at 6 wanting to do stockings. DS1 just fell back asleep but I've come up for a lie down and feel so nauseous. It's just me so if I vom then it's game over for everyone 🤣

Yup, crappest of days. We lost both our dogs to an infection on 23rd and 24th. I'm heartbroken and I still have to go through the motions. 2024 can get in the bin.

This is a turning point for you and you dh OP, this is when your family unit got even stronger and united. Do what you have to do this year to set your expectations for the future. Good luck.