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Original poster

Am I being suspicious unnecessarily?

178 replies

Anoniam · 08/12/2024 23:54

I have an Amazon account. I have Prime, so partner uses my account occasionally.
I've just been through my search history looking for something I bought a while ago and decided to delete a few items from my browsing history. There were items on there obviously my partner had been searching...
Any idea why he'd be searching for these? The women's fancy dress has made me suspicious.

Also searched for a penguin cuddly toy with Arsenal on it and a baby's dressing gown with arsenal on it. We don't know any babies and he doesn't support Arsenal.

Am I being suspicious unnecessarily?
OP posts:
Original poster
Anoniam · 08/12/2024 23:55

Also searching this...
Which seems odd.

Am I being suspicious unnecessarily?
OP posts:
purpleme12 · 08/12/2024 23:57

If you'd like to know, ask him

Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:01

I will but he's not going to be honest. I don't see why he'd be looking at buying a woman's fancy dress costume. It makes me wonder if he has plans with someone.

OP posts:

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General shopping
wantnoscrubs · 09/12/2024 00:02

Are you sure it's search and not recommended items?

Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:07

It's definitely browsing history, most of the other things in there are things I've clicked on. I feel sick. He must be looking for someone, it's a pretty sexy looking outfit too.

OP posts:
ByHardyAquaFox · 09/12/2024 00:18

Uh oh. That seems bad news, I am afraid.
Have you noticed any changes in his behaviour recently?
Is he overly protective of his smartphone ?

Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:19

ByHardyAquaFox · 09/12/2024 00:18

Uh oh. That seems bad news, I am afraid.
Have you noticed any changes in his behaviour recently?
Is he overly protective of his smartphone ?

He never leaves his phone. He's cheated in the past. Glued to his phone 24/7.

OP posts:
SmalllChange · 09/12/2024 00:21

Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:19

He never leaves his phone. He's cheated in the past. Glued to his phone 24/7.

Show quote history

And you're still with him because? 😳

wantnoscrubs · 09/12/2024 00:21

Sorry to hear that OP - can you do some digging before confronting him.

Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:21

@ByHardyAquaFox so I'm not the only one who finds it suspicious? It makes no sense to me. He's always loved fancy dress parties but we aren't going anywhere. Also, a barbers pole??? (He's not in the hair cutting profession!).

OP posts:
Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:24

Ok, just remembered that he has a friend down the local pub who has recently had a baby and he watches footie with him. So I'm assuming baby items are for him.
Women's fancy dress ...
Barber pole...
Camera...
No idea.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:25

The truth is, I'm pathetic and can't cope with what I'd find. I'm literally in bed shaking.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:26

I'm going to mention it tomorrow. The problem is, he deflects and gets angry. Ill metion it and he will say I'm crazy, mental, I secure.

I was thinking of starting by asking how his fancy dress party went...

OP posts:
TunaTheSilverTabbyCat · 09/12/2024 00:28

Maybe the outfits are for him ?
No clue on the barbers pole tho

Original poster
Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:29

No, it's really not his thing, honestly. Definitely not for him.

OP posts:
ByHardyAquaFox · 09/12/2024 00:30

Well, if he is cheated before then I think you can safely say he is doing it again.
Sorry, OP.

ChaosHol1 · 09/12/2024 00:34

I quite often search things on amazon in work if it's something we are talking about or someone wants. In the last week alone I searched for jewellery for a colleague for her ds wedding, a um2c battery as a colleague said that's what was needed (it wasn't), duel buddies game and various fancy dress outfits that began with the letters of our names for a colleagues bday party as that's the theme.

SmalllChange · 09/12/2024 00:36

ChaosHol1 · 09/12/2024 00:34

I quite often search things on amazon in work if it's something we are talking about or someone wants. In the last week alone I searched for jewellery for a colleague for her ds wedding, a um2c battery as a colleague said that's what was needed (it wasn't), duel buddies game and various fancy dress outfits that began with the letters of our names for a colleagues bday party as that's the theme.

Edited

Yep.

Yesterday I searched for size 20 brown leggings.

I'm a size 10 and haven't worn leggings since the 1980s but my colleague wanted a pair so I had a look for her.

Rainbowbub22 · 09/12/2024 01:10

Go with your gut instinct, it's usually right

Noseybookworm · 09/12/2024 01:14

The sexy fancy dress could be that it came up in conversation with his mates and he was just having a look to see what it's like? The barber's pole is very wierd, no clue what that could be about! He didn't buy these items though did he? So he was just looking out of curiosity?

I think the problem here is that he's cheated in the past and you don't really trust him, do you? With good reason 🫤

IdylicDay · 09/12/2024 01:25

Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:19

He never leaves his phone. He's cheated in the past. Glued to his phone 24/7.

Show quote history

And you're still with him, even knowing this?

And you say he won't be honest with you? Why have so little self respect you choose to be with someone you know won't be honest with you? His dick isn't gold-plated is it?

IdylicDay · 09/12/2024 01:28

Anoniam · 09/12/2024 00:26

I'm going to mention it tomorrow. The problem is, he deflects and gets angry. Ill metion it and he will say I'm crazy, mental, I secure.

I was thinking of starting by asking how his fancy dress party went...

Edited

FFS why are you with him? Please tell me you're not that desperate for a man you will accept a cheating pos who emotionally abuses you and gaslights you? Honey life is sooooo much better on your own than dealing with a scumbag like that. Kick him to the gutter, he isn't even worth the cuttings of your toenails. He is shit.

Ph3 · 09/12/2024 01:29

Personally I think you have bigger problems - you say you can ask but he won’t be honest or that he will deflect get angry and then minimise your feelings. I think you need to ask yourself if this is really a relationship you want to continue giving your time to

MsDogLady · 09/12/2024 04:29

@Anoniam, what recovery requirements did you set to restore and maintain trust when you stayed with him after his previous infidelity?

A remorseful cheat would be providing full transparency and access to his devices. He would be an open book when you have questions and empathetic to your insecurities, which he created via his faithless behavior. He would also erect strong boundaries when interacting with other women. He’d do all he could to help you heal.

Why are you tolerating his dodgy phone behavior and his contemptuous, manipulative name calling when you ask questions or express your discomfort about things, @Anoniam? Your betrayer is still treating you like shit on his shoe.

I too think he has someone else in mind for the dress … that he is already up to something or soon will be. Even if not, he is clearly a nasty piece of work and you are doing yourself a great disservice by staying.

Meadowfinch · 09/12/2024 05:57

Rainbowbub22 · 09/12/2024 01:10

Go with your gut instinct, it's usually right

This.