Am I being suspicious unnecessarily?

[Anoniam]

I have an Amazon account. I have Prime, so partner uses my account occasionally.
I've just been through my search history looking for something I bought a while ago and decided to delete a few items from my browsing history. There were items on there obviously my partner had been searching...
Any idea why he'd be searching for these? The women's fancy dress has made me suspicious.

Also searched for a penguin cuddly toy with Arsenal on it and a baby's dressing gown with arsenal on it. We don't know any babies and he doesn't support Arsenal.

No. Browsing History is stuff you've looked at, it does not mean that you Searched for it. It might come up as a random "You might be interested in" or a deal of the day type thing. It just means that someone that uses the account clicked the thumbnail or suggestion to see what it was.

Search History would appear in the drop-down next to Search.

Whether you're right to be suspicious or not is neither here nor there if you're basing it on totally false assumptions and choose to confront him.

OP, I beg you to read your own posts.

How can you dislike yourself to such a degree that you are not actively making arrangements to get away from this emotional pygmy?

He is probably searching for random shizz to get you confused. These types are a head fuck morning noon and night and normals will never 'get' them. They are too far gone.

Get away and grant yourself some mental peace.

To answer your question, yes you are being suspicious unnecessarily.

Not because he is innocent, but because you won't leave him even if he is a lying, abusive, cheating, bullying arsehole.
There is no point in being suspicious, or not being suspicious, if it makes no difference to the actions you choose.
Why bother working yourself up into a state of fear and suspicion if you are not going to leave?

Perhaps it would help us understand better if you could explain WHY you won't consider leaving him.

So he's getting onto your Amazon account and searching for this stuff. He is messing with your head. Are you scared of him? Is there a reason you haven't sent a password on the account so he can't get on it? Does he control the money? Why can't you leave?
And since you can't, why are you insisting on confronting him when you know

1. He will lie anyway, and you'll end up feeling worse, and
2. It will give him the heads up that you're on to him again.

Of course being the charmer that he is, he'll probably find that funny.

Are you worried he is a secret barber? 💈

Don't mention the browsing history.

Wait for an opportunity to check his phone, tablet, laptop etc.

If you mention the browsing history and he is cheating, he will cover his tracks.

At the moment you have the upper hand. Do more digging.

It doesn't matter about the search history

He has cheated in the past and is glued to his phone 24/7. The only possible way I can ever understand women who get back with a cheat is if the cheat is genuinely sorry and makes effort to be open and transparent.

Does you both have a prime account.
More than likely it's friends who wanted free delivery and he has passed the details to them.
I would check transaction and shipping history and see what address it was posted to.
Happened to me.
Browsing history was full of cans of fizzy drinks and we don't drink fizz. When I looked further it was my family member who had been given the details.

That's because you don't trust him.

If my husband had looked at that it would never occur to me that he had plans with someone else.

What if he is Christmas shopping.
Dress for you.
Barber shop sign for a mate as a laugh.
Arsenal baby top for a friend's child.

Tbh, I think the fact you question speaks volumes about your relationship.

Please value your self.
Have confidence.
You deserve to be in a living relationship where you do not have to question such things.
You are an amazing individual and don't need him to improve your self worth.
Write down goals in your life. Write down what you deserve. Write down you positive attributes.

You are better off alone than with a cheat. Sorry but once a cheat then I can't trust again.

This sounds like such a completely unhappy relationship - he's done a real number on you. The Amazon thing is pretty irrelevant. Why would you be with him any longer?

Sadly this is often what happens when you stay with someone who has cheated. You simply cannot trust the person again no matter how hard you try. I'm not judging you Op. I took my husband back. I never trusted him again. In the end we divorced ( after he'd cheated yet again and left with a 17 year old from work. He was 32 )

It’s not really very clear in my view. Sometimes people send me links to ask my opinion on items and I’ll click them. Nothing about the fancy dress is actually “sexual” it’s just how women’s fancy dress tends to be nowadays.

I would need a lot more evidence to assume anything was going on as this isn’t strong enough to even make me wonder.

I think you are overthinking the Amazon thing. But why? It's because you know what he's capable of. Do you suspect he's cheating again? Why dont you have enough self love to tell him to fuck all the way off? Because no doubt he's dragged it from you. Find it again, leave this waste of space and work on yourself. People think being single is the worst thing in life, honestly it's not! Being with someone who makes you feel shit is much worse. No kids involved by the sounds of it so get out now before it changes. You have to ask yourself are you getting what you need from this relationship? If the answer is no,.I hope it is! Get out for the sale of your mental health and future. You got this!

Daft presents for friends?

Why are you even asking him when you know how he'll react? You also won't do anything about it....all a bit pointless really.

@Anoniam Are you okay? You said you were going to confront him and haven’t posted since, so a bit worried.

You don’t need to update us, if you’d rather not. Just a quick ‘I’m alright’ when you have a second would be grand.

Any chance he’s got a stag do coming up?

I’m sorry but why are you asking strangers? Go up to him and say what you were doing and just ask. If you can’t trust he’s going to give a straight answer why are you with him? I wouldn’t say the outfit is sexy… it’s fancy dress. And the barber thing is not suspicious. I search for the most random things.

actually I didn’t even know you can check Amazon history and I’m sure if my husband checked ours he’s have a blast lol

There was a photo album in my Amazon basket yesterday, added via Alexa apparently lol

I know you’re not looking for relationship advice but please at least try to consider your steps to get out of this. The gaslighting behaviour you’ve described and the reactionary physical symptoms you describe happened to me in an abusive relationship and I’m now disabled for life with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. No man is worth your health. You cannot sleep and you are shaking. You will look back one day and curse yourself for not protecting yourself. Don’t live in a nightmare. Please escape. 🙏

Is he looking for ideas for you

I agree go with your gut instinct a womans instinct is a remarkable gift.Whenever I've had this feeling it's always been right.Face him with this don't let it fester good luck x

He's cheated and he's trying to gaslight you when you query his actions. You know what it all means. Are you going to let this continue? He's not a keeper.