What’s the best bit of advice you’ve ever received on MN?

[DressingAsMyFavouriteQualityStreet]

For me, there are loads, but there is one thing that is really working out for me.

On one of my many distraught threads about 2 toxic women I have to deal with in my DH’s family, I was told to “drop the rope” and “do nothing”.

I’ve been doing this for 3 years now, and it has transformed my MH and life around these people. It’s still a DH problem, yes. I just “do nothing”. When they texted me, I just diverted them to DH. I left him to arrange all meet ups, communication, remembering birthdays, everything. Turns out, it doesn’t get done if I’m not doing it. I grey rocked, dropped the rope, did nothing, and am still doing nothing, and I am now seeing them once a year where I smile and say nothing and grey rock it. It’s absolute bliss.

So, who’d have thought that doing nothing could change so much? Its amazing.

What’s the best advice you’ve ever got on MN and how has it helped you?

I joined years ago and have had lots of advice
Dealing with my asc daughter as well as my divorce

It's a two way thing though you give and get. I'm not on here often, and yes it's changed slightly but people are awesome in general .

Fuming my washing machine does not have a spin only function - only rinse and spin. It's sooooooo annoying

Me too! Forever thankful for those who responded to my thread with advice. I knew his behaviour wasn’t right, but that thread opened my eyes to what a nasty piece of work he was. 12 years free of him!

And I know it’s a cliche but “no is a complete sentence” has also been very useful. I’m not blunt enough to just say it, but a friend is (well, she says “no thanks.”) and it’s helped to see how people just respect her for being honest and straightforward. No waffly vague excuses, just “no thanks.”

Mine too.

@RobinEllacotStrike

That looks lovely! Sample ordered 🙂

Aaaawww. That os a annoying ☹️. Such a useful function I hadn't even thought about until the drying thread.

@babasaclover 'Fuming my washing machine does not have a spin only function - only rinse and spin. It's sooooooo annoying'

It's not Bosch is it? Until very recently, I thought my Bosch machine only had a rinse&spin function, then I saw a you tube video which showed with the press of one button it can just do just a spin cycle.

4 years I've had the bloody thing before I found out!

Well I've just had a google and yes I think this will work for mine. Basically turn the dial to 'rinse/spin/drain' then press aqua plus to turn off rinse. 🤯

Yes!! Exactly that!

What don't they bloody tell you that when you buy it ffs 🤦‍♀️

I tried it this week and can confirm it works.

LTB

I'd never see anyone if I didn't do the running.

I can't give it a neat name but the 25 thing. You get a bag and count 25 things into it that can go in the bin. Bits of rubbish like a broken pen, rubber band, anything that's taking up space in a cupboard or drawer that wants throwing out.

I’ve got a Samsung eco bubble . If anyone can tell me how to get it on a spin cycle I would be grateful. Also how do I turn the tune back on when it’s finished? It’s somehow been turned off.

This one was too late for me as kids were in juniors when I joined.
The envelope shoulders on baby vests are there so you can roll the vest down in case of a poonami!
Doh!

Right. Have just tried it on an actual wash and yep. Yes it works!

5 years I've had it!

Lots of things already mentioned on this thread. Other things I learned about through MN which have made a positive difference to me:

Mooncups
Couch to 5K
parkrun
Woolly Hugs

‘Don’t set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.’ I’m not the sort of person to do that, but have used it when chatting with friends/acquaintances who are.

‘Not my circus, not my monkeys.’ Again, more for others than for me, but I like the expression, and I think it sticks with people.

I also like ‘no is a complete sentence’ (even though I don’t totally buy into it) and ‘it’s an invitation, not a summons’.

@Whiteblanket 'Right. Have just tried it on an actual wash and yep. Yes it works!

5 years I've had it!'

Happy to be of help. I wish I'd known years ago. So many times I've wasted 22 mins of my life on the full cycle.

And I can now do an extra spin for faster drying times.

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/3401016-i-accidentally-let-my-washing-get-darked-on

I had to google it. 🤓

My washing machine usually does two spins but you can program up to five. How dry can I get these clothes?!

Great thread, thanks @DressingAsMyFavouriteQualityStreet

Please can you share the 'how' N Thanks !

It’s already been said but ‘don’t put it down, put it away’ must run through my head daily. I also used to do the mumsnet haircut when I was on maternity leave and didn’t have much money.

To ignore people who say that a particular sleep schedule or method of getting the baby to sleep "will set you up for problems down the line". Who cares? You'll come up with new solutions to those problems if / when they happen. What matters now is that you as a parent get some sleep so you can actually look after yourself and the baby properly and make better choices on the day to day stuff.

Very helpful and not just for sleep issues. I used to get really stressed looking at what would work long term rather than focusing on what I / DC needed now.

You can’t change other people, only your reactions to them.

Parent the child you have.

When ordering from a new online shop always search for 10 % or equivalent off for new customers for email sign up.

Never go upstairs or downstairs without taking something to put away in its correct place.

Do a five min clean of the kitchen such as wiping one surface or the hob whilst making a hot drink.

keep a hand towel in the kitchen to reduce the amount of kitchen roll you use / clean tea towels you reach for.

If you have a baby, keep a baby change station downstairs as well as upstairs so you aren’t continually carrying them back up to their main change table (for some reason this one took me ages to work out).

clean out your washing machine seal regularly and leave the door open between washes.

if you don’t have space or budget for a tumble dryer try and purchase a dehumidifier - it will dry clothes so much better on inside drying racks in the winter.

Keep a collection of birthday cards in a drawer along with a set of first class stamps.

if you feel you spend too much time online when you get any downtime, try and replace 20 mins or so by reading a book instead, it’s surprising how quickly it adds up and you get through the book.