I really hate my life. It is honestly the most pathetic existence.

[ihatemylife8]

I'm 30. I have no friends. No partner and never had a partner. I've never so much as hugged a man let alone anything more. My job stresses me out and I seem to burn out in jobs every 6 months or so and then leave. I constantly have hives because I'm stressed, and I don't even know why I'm stressed half the time. I live with my parents still and can't afford to rent even a studio. My Mum is literally my only friend. On weekends where she is busy with her own life I just sit at home as I have no one else to do things with.

I really don't know why it's all gone wrong. I was 'normal' as a child and teen but have had a complete failure to launch. I have tried therapy and CBT and they were a waste of time and made me feel worse.

I've just cone round after my hubby died in 2016. My friends are spread all over the world so my social life was a bit shot. But I figured I'd get our DCs into adult hood and supported before I even reopened my own wings.

Anyways, @ihatemylife8 I joined a FB group for my age group, women only and I have met 5 amazing women who I now see pretty regularly. It has been life changing to be back out meeting people and enjoying myself. I obvs also occasionally see my friends of old too but I absolutely love and respect my new friends. Can I suggest you do the same. It's likely the first meet will be for coffee/cake but then you'll get invited to all sorts of things.

Good luck xxx

Wow you sound depressed. Think a visit to your Doctor may be needed. Also have you tried volunteering? Great way to meet people and make friends. Look at the different groups on your area. Everyone is special and has potential. Seems to me you are picking the wrong jobs. Look for something different change direction change your life.

A sideways question, and I might be way off course, but... have you ever considered you might be autistic? The burnouts you describe sound familiar.... It might be something to explore, as you can go easier on yourself and get support. I was diagnosed just over a year ago at the age of 53. It has helped to reassess some things in my life, and to learn when to be easier on myself. I've also joined a writing group, which has helped me to continue to explore what's going on in my inner world, which has helped put the outer world more in perspective

Hiya, reading through your posts, I agree with @Stalygirl It sounds to me as though you might be autistic or ADHD with autistic traits. This might be something to look at online and see if any of the various traits ring a bell with you, and then armed with this information to can chat with a gp

I am so sorry to hear of your distress, look on the mirror every morning smile at yourself and say: either to yourself or out loud, 'I am absolutely great.' Remember during the day to smile and say hi to people in a light happy tone. Spreading happiness around will make people around you happier and you happier.

Then do as everybody else is suggesting. Remember: 'you are great'.

Good luck and best of kind wishes. Xx.

So I recently read that due to the fact of the sheer number of possible combinations of eggs and sperms the odds of you, the person, you, the human life form existing in the first place are like 1 in a bazillion billion gazillion (like some unfathomably incomprehensibly large number). So you can either worry that you're not living an identical life to someone else or you can just be yourself. In my experience most men are knob heads and relationship are situations based on how much crap you're prepared to put up with, sometimes you meet nice friends but often they disappear after a while or circumstances change things, or they juts turn out to be arseholes, and jobs are crap nobody wants to work. You don't have to prove yourself. You've already beaten the odd cos youre here in the first place. That's yours, your prize. Immerse yourself in nature, art, music, landscape, learn random shit unconnected to your job. So what if you can't afford to move out and your only friend is your mam. It's doesn't matter you don't have to be anything else you can just live. Don't move out. Stay with them. Love yourself and bollocks to everyone else. You don't have to live a certain way or do certain things to deserve an existence. You're here. Go buy some seeds and grow a garden. Grow food plant flowers for pollinators and bam you've made a contribution. You don't have anything to prove.

You sound like you have social anxiety at a minimum. Would you consider medication or counselling?

I really don't know how much more I can take at the moment. Losing my job felt like the final straw, but I somehow managed to get myself back up again and start applying for jobs. But I'm getting rejection after rejection. I'm getting rejections for jobs that were identical to what I was doing in my previous role, it doesn't make any sense. I wrote this post at the end of September thinking my life was awful, little did I know it was going to become so much worse in just a matter of days.

Sorry you are having such a shitty time op - applying for jobs is rubbish at the best of times. Are you taking any medication for anxiety / depression? You sound quite anxious and depressed x

What was your previous job? Why are they rejecting you? If you are qualified and experienced in the role I’d only expect instant rejection if you aren’t putting the effort in to tailor the applications individually. This is no disrespect if you are, I’m just trying to rationalise why you might get rejected.

When you are stuck in that cycle of negativity, knock backs can seem like the worst thing in the world. But I am absolutely believer in that if something is meant for you it won’t pass you buy. The right job will come along but it won’t be instant. And when it does, it will be the right one for you. Trust the process and be kind to yourself.

Have you visited your GP and asked for further support?

"Who has a why to live can bear almost any how" - Friedrich Nietzsche.

When you don't have a why, every day will seem like a struggle. Small wins will be over celebrated and every set back will be seen as a catastrophe.

You need some kind of vision for your future. This is usually a function of who you are. When you have a vision it puts all of the daily struggles and crap everyone has to deal with into perspective.

Life will constantly challenge you, thats why people have families and put so much work into a career, it insulates you from the chaos of life.

I think you need to figure out who you are, what a good future looks like and then take small daily steps to achieve it over time. It does not work any other way.

If you are prone to high anxiety you shouldn't be going anywhere near sugar, alcohol or any processed food - they will dysregulate serotonin which balances your mood.

I would also highly recommend psychologically modelling someone you admire in behaviours. Over time your brain will rewire itself and your thoughts and personality will change and so must your life. What would they do in any situation?

Oh OP 😥

It could be anything. It could be a terrible job market. It could possibly be because you're feeling so hopeless it's coming through in your applications.

Try this. Imagine you are applying on behalf of a friend who you think is absolutely amazing and would be brilliant at the job. They have the same cv as you. Write it in the third person.

Then change it to the first person.

sorry you lost your job, that sucks, I have been made redundant twice and had contracts end. Are you financially in a position to take a break? Maybe re think your career? You could always volunteer or take a temporary job, to tie you over. I ended up doing something completely different, as previous jobs never went anywhere, it’s part time so I can study and hopefully gain a qualification.