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Original poster

Absolutely fekkin fuming

394 replies

almondflake · 14/09/2024 01:47

We're Into the first day of a family holiday to Mexico with our daughter, her boyfriend and another couple .
It took us hours to get here and after a decent nights sleep , daughters boyfriend has had too much to drink and kicked off big time , storming round the hotel then kicking the hotel room door in . Luckily the hotel have not called the police , we've paid for the door , my husband has taken the boyfriend away to sober up , I'm sat in my hotel room with a distraught daughter .we're hoping to get him on a flight home tomorrow as he can't stay here , I'm absolutely furious with him, he's 24 and he's blaming it all on our daughter .
I'm not looking for solutions just venting really .

OP posts:
LuluBlakey1 · 14/09/2024 08:04

Make sure he does not go home and keep the cat- he won't look after it. Your daughter should get the cat.

Gremlins101 · 14/09/2024 08:05

almondflake · 14/09/2024 04:12

In answer to a previous question , the hotel are willing to let him stay but have taken his wrist band off him and given him a no alcohol one and have said any other bad behaviour or violence they will call the police .
I still want him gone tomorrow if it can be arranged. We'll have to speak to the rep tomorrow , it's 10pm here , as looking at one way flights back home are costing around £800 . The cheapest one was about £350 but would take 54 hours with 3 stopovers which might serve him right to be honest .

Yes, buy that flight for him OP!! A 54 hour journey home with a bad hangover will be just the trick.

I hope the holiday improves once he is gone x

eish · 14/09/2024 08:06

54 hour flight is definitely what he deserves.

BrendaSmall · 14/09/2024 08:09

My daughter was with an absolute asshole,
we’ve only ever called him dickhead 🤣
unfortunately he’s always treated her like shit, we tried for years to open her eyes as to what he was like, couldn’t hold down a job, not telling her he’d been sacked and still pretending to go to work.
Running up credit card debt and basically never going without, top of the range phone, new clothes new trainers ect ect.
everytime he got found out we would tell her to leave but she wouldn’t and says she loves him, she didn’t love the real person because she didn’t know him as everything that came out of his mouth was lies
Yes she did go on to marry him and have children with him 😢
She’s now separated from him and he gave up a bloody good job and doesn’t support his children

he thinks he’s the world’s best dad unfortunately he lets his children down too as he’s too busy chasing around after females a lot younger than him!!

Only thing you can do is to stand by your daughter and be there to support her until she sees what he Really is like for herself

Bellyblueboy · 14/09/2024 08:09

Your daughter is very lucky she has you. You are a great mum 🥰

Lets us sh sees what a twat this man is and leaves him. But dear over her, this is humiliating.

KievLoverTwo · 14/09/2024 08:13

Could a friend get a locksmith out to change the locks and get his stuff moved out whilst he is on the very long flight? If someone has access to feed the cat, does someone have keys?

The violent outburst could be booze AND drugs, I have seen it twice, and had no idea it was coming.

Fannyfiggs · 14/09/2024 08:13

He's an abuser. The 54 hour journey home for him is perfect.

It would be such a pity if his destination airport was quite a distance away from where he actually lives...

NewtyCutey · 14/09/2024 08:16

I hope you're rid of him. Money well spent to send him home. I hope this is a wake-up call for your daughter.

Sortalike · 14/09/2024 08:21

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. As previous posters have suggested, I'd show your DD this thread.

His actions will never be forgotten by you all, and it's not so much about the fact he got blind drunk, but that he became violent and abusive.

So many red flags here and while the decision to end the relationship is DD's, this is the time for you and DH to support her in doing so.

And yes...put him on the 54 hour flight home

Henleylady · 14/09/2024 08:23

Google flights is showing that the 3pm Tui today flight from Cancun direct to Glasgow is only £286. If that is a real price I would stick him on that and he can make his own way home!

Failing that Mondays flight to Gatwick is a similar price if money becomes a sticking point to him going home.

Tui may well let him do swap for free (assuming you are with Tui).

Conniebygaslight · 14/09/2024 08:23

I really hope she dumps him OP but I suspect she won’t. He’ll probably be charming tomorrow, he’s onto a good thing and and won’t want to lose that.

ZeroFucksGivenToday · 14/09/2024 08:23

It sounds as though they live together. So she may get home to her place trashed. Im
not sure that you can make him get on a plane, but you can tell him he isn't staying with you guys anymore and the hotel want him gone.

Duckswaddle · 14/09/2024 08:28

I wouldn’t want this abusive monstrosity anywhere near my children. Get him the fuck gone.

iNoticed · 14/09/2024 08:28

You sound like a great Mum! As it sounds like you are doing, you have to give your daughter space to make the right decision about the relationship - but it might be worth reminding her that love isn’t enough. If she want a partnership she has to look at the sort of life she can build in that partnership and is it what she wants. And if it isn’t, it might be heartbreaking but separating is the best thing to do.

AnywhereAnyoneAnyTime · 14/09/2024 08:31

This reminds me of my sister’s bf.
He was teetotal and was in fact a fairly decent bloke. But then we went on holiday to Turkey and he tried some of the local drink and drank to excess every night.

To be fair to him he didn’t abuse anyone, but the drinking was so out of character. Turned he was a recovering alcoholic and had never told anyone. I’m teetotal so my sister hadn’t thought it unusual.

So although it does seem that he’s a total arsehole if your dd has been carrying him, it’s possible it could be something like this and your daughter is telling the truth about this being out of character.

Jk987 · 14/09/2024 08:41

Put him on the 54 hour, 3 stopover flight! Why pay more for the idiot?

He's 24, he can cope.

Crunchymum · 14/09/2024 08:43

Sounds like it's a bit more complicated as they live together?

What's the living situation? Praying your DD is the tenant and can kick him out?

Mseddy · 14/09/2024 08:45

@almondflake I got an emergency flight home from Mexico 48 hours into my holiday (very different reasons unfortunately) but we rang the TUI helpline and they sorted it all out. It cost us about £300 to change 3 people's flights. We didn't have to book a whole new one. Id ring your holiday provider and explain he needs to be home and get his flight rearranged

Workhardcryharder · 14/09/2024 08:50

Ava27268 · 14/09/2024 06:21

How awful but also, quite fortunate for you and her dad to have witnessed this kind of behaviour and to intervene now, rather than it happening years down the line behind closed doors. I hope your daughter can forget about the idiot on your holiday and make plans to leave him!

Fully agree with this,

it’s very possible (probable) that either this has happened before and she has hidden it or had you not been there your DD would have hidden it. So lucky you were there to witness it

TealSheep · 14/09/2024 08:53

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines - previously banned poster.

Shineybrightthings · 14/09/2024 08:56

This low life has shown his true colours. I suspect your daughter will open up to you in the coming days and you’ll find he didn’t just turn into a prick in Mexico. She’s been covering and making excuses for him. There’s much worse to come from him if she allows him to remain in her life. I speak from experience. Today will likely be his grovelling apology. Telling her he loves her and would never hurt her etc. Just think, if he behaved like this in front of her parents what is the bastard capable of behind closed doors. 😡

6pence · 14/09/2024 08:57

Does your dd actually want him to go home? Is she ready to end the relationship?

Superworm24 · 14/09/2024 08:58

Do they share a house/flat OP? If he were to go home first just be aware that he may take control of the property or ruin her possessions on his return.

Hoppinggreen · 14/09/2024 09:04

This stupid man is 24, nobody can "make him" go home or do anything else unfortunately.
If he had a shred of decency he would but probably not, the reality is that he will probably spend the rest of the holiday being a Dick or mooning around after DD until she takes him back.

EveryOtherNameTaken · 14/09/2024 09:09

If he doesn't normally drink this could be the reason why. Alcohol changes him totally. I bet he won't remember a thing and plead forgiveness. Poor DD. It is unlikely to be the last time this happens unfortunately.

I think someone needs to sort DDs possessions and keep hold of the cat until she gets home.

Dickhead has ruined not just the holiday. Hopefully time away from him now will give her the headstart not to listen to his bs and get taken in.