I just burst into tears in Tesco.

[Itsnotallsparkles]

NC as bit embarrassed. Just writing in solidarity to those struggling with stuff lately. I’m 30, recently dumped by my partner of 10 years and have been left in our flat covering all of the bills. £1200 rent instead of £600 each, you can imagine it’s tough. Stupidly the flat is in my name not his as I used to rent it before we met for £800, it’s gone up a lot in that time. He’s disappeared, blocked me and supposedly with someone else now.

Anyway, stood in the queue in Tesco. Had done a food shop of £40 delivered a few days ago but things only had a date of 1-2 days on them so needed a top up. isn’t it ridiculous how nothing has long lasting dates on it anymore? It’s a rip off.

Stood to pay and card gets declined, I’m not sure why as money is in there. I stand embarrassed with a queue forming as I check my app. No signal, stand to the side trying to join WiFi to check my online baking. Horrible man comes up next to me and says “thanks for holding up the queue’ well that was it, and I stupidly burst into tears. Left the shop.

Turns out my car insurance has taken a yearly amount from my bank rather than the monthly instalments I chose leaving me with nothing. I was sort of holding it together the past few weeks until that moment. Had a little cry/scream in my car😂

but anyway, I just wanted to write on here as I see a lot about darling husbands, massive houses, big holidays and weddings and I just wanted to reach out to those who are struggling whether that be with money, a relationship breakdown, illness, or a hard week. Mumsnet should be a place to support each other in solidarity sometimes. I see too much on here of people ripping each other apart.

It's almost always a man isn't it?

I was trying to decide what cobs to buy.

I was a bit back there was room in front of me.

Chap said "are you buying or just looking?".

I just rolled my eyes stayed where I was.

Twat!

I wasn't even in the way!

@SaltAndVinegar2

Sorry haven't much time, I need to go out. But take this for example. It clearly says 2+ days. If it turns up with 2+ days, yes it's not long, but it's not 'a short dated' product. It's as advertised, not entitled to a refund & whenever I've been 'instore' there aren't any with 'longer' dates.

@SaltAndVinegar2

helps if you actually attach the image🤦🏻‍♀️

I'd have cried too , Gentle hugs x

Absolutely this.
It’s a weekly occurrence with my Tesco delivery, I’ve had as many as 12 items fully refunded before now because the dates were shorter than stated on the app, and they never note it on the receipt.
Just last week one item arrived on it’s use by date when it should’ve been good for 1+ weeks.

Sorry that you had to encounter such a rude man, I hope things soon improve for you.

Cried in the Costco parking lot after getting yelled at over a parking spot.

I had my 7 m/o and toddler with me. Had taken me 2 hours to get out the door and it was a bloody hot day. I was low on sleep. Nice lady in vehicle beside offered kind words. Just one of those days....

I hope the tide turns for you soon xx

Awwww, thinking of you. Things sound really tough. xx

Horrible man comes up next to me and says “thanks for holding up the queue’ well that was it, and I stupidly burst into tears. Left the shop.

I must admit, my response would have been, 'Go fuck yourself - nobody else will!'

(But then, I do have a bit of a temper. I probably would have cried on the way home.)

My heart goes out to you. I remember the hard times myself. I won’t bore you with the detail. I just want you to know that this will pass and one day you will see the departure of that plonker a true blessing.

A random man was awful to me in our local Asda just after my mum died. I also burst into tears. My crime? I forgot to put the separator thingy down after I’d loaded my shopping on. The man was horrendous, called me all sorts of names and I promptly burst into tears and left the store.

it’s them, not you! Sending love xx

Sending you a massive hug and 💐 op. Life (and bank timing) can be cruel sometimes. I’m currently juggling every money option known to woman, after emergency vet bills, car service, dentist bill and life generally sucking all happened at once. Right now I’m drowning, but a cuddle with my dog who is thankfully still alive has kept me going. I hope there’s some well earned light heading your way soon xx

One day you will have more money, more happiness and less worry. But he will still be wanker.

Hope tomorrow is a better day OP. The random shouty man is a twat. Defo get money back from insurers.

Hi, I just wanted to throw a few ideas around for this poster. Some people will think they are financially reckless ideas and that is fine if they are not for you but here goes:

On a couple of occasions when we knew we were going to be under a huge amount of financial strain we have took big loans - loans that were enough to pay themselves with and subsidise our living costs/expenses. E.g. 20k knowing that we could pay the loan with itself and have up to a year to find a job (other partner working). Just said the purpose of the loan was a new car. Never missed a payment and no issues. Obviously you need to factor in oaying extra £350 odd each month in future. I'm not sure how your maternity leave will affect your eligibility but you might be OK if you state that you will be returning to work.

If you have a mortgage the new mortgage charter should allow you to seek advice from your lender without affecting your credit. You might be able to go interest only or even take a payment break. Again the payments will be higher when they resume unless you extend the term.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/mortgage-charter/mortgage-charter

Similar to loan idea do you have a credit card that allows a money transfer to your bank at 0% interest or low interest for an offer period? You could get a 0% purchase card then transfer to a balance transfer offer card. Pay the mortgage/rent with the cash that you have but put petrol, food, car insurance on the card.

Apply for universal credit. Your partner might be entitled to the one you get eligibility for from working. Apply ASAP as it will take time to come through.

Do you have an expensive car that you could sell? Get a cheap one?

A mechanic hugged me once under similar circumstances. I was just done. I'm sorry you had an unsympathetic bastard in your face. Good luck with everything my lovely. You will get to better days ✨️ xxx

Sending hugs op,

what a hard time…I am sorry you were left with that horrible man to deal with! Can’t quite believe the nastiness of such a comment.

you deserve better, you will have better. Hold on and you will quickly find a « new normal » that feels ok for you. Give it a bit of time and come to tell us how you are doing.

🌺

So glad your mum can help you OP and enjoy for film and

I had to transfer money from savings for groceries.

Aww! I would have given you a big hug and offered to pay your bill! This too shall pass…it’s so easy to view everyone’s external world from your internal world, no one is as ok as they seem. Take care xxx

I could have written this, different circumstances (illness, dementia, carer, bereavement - it's been a dreadful year) but the point is, reaching that moment of being utterly overwhelmed by it all.
I found listing ALL the year's shittiness to a complete stranger (in my case the local counselling service triaging my needs) was helpful but why I say I could have written it is I've spent the last two days just crying.
I've no magic wand beyond sympathy but am sending you that.

So sorry that happened to you. When you feel so vulnerable it just needs one person to deliver the final blow.
Things will get better. Sending love 💐

Things will get better I promise you. I was in lidl once with £14.52. No one to help as my father had just died and the dwp took my carers allowance.
I've since paid for other people's shopping and parking but I've never forgotten the feeling.

@Winter2020 has posted some excellent advice.
You can definitely get the DD back if they've made a mistake. Sometimes they give you a sorry (£) too.

Life takes many turns. I had a shit fourteen years in rented houses but since I turned 50 I've had better jobs than ever before. :Chin up duck' as they say up north.

So sorry to hear what your going through,
Believe me i have been there and it really hurts.
But one day very soon the sun will shine on you.
If you can, try and find somewhere cheaper and start again.
It will work out for you.
And for that "thing" a little message for him,
"what goes round, comes round"

The date on bagged salad isn't good at all lately. Today in tesco the dates were all today's date and I wanted salad bag for tomorrow. I asked the man who worked there if there was any better dates he ignored me and continued to shove the bags onto one case so they were all crushed and damaged making the leaves all bruised and damaged 🙄

Sorry life is tough at the moment. I totally understand.

Have you tried the too good to go app? Use it for supermarkets only, as other places are just sandwiches etc. I picked up a £5 deal a few days ago from m&s. Got salad, curry, a pie, mash potatoes, pears and a few snack type foods. Most goes into the freezer and lasts me a good week x