Anyone awake at all? Just found a man in the corner of my bedroom

[PollyPicksMe]

On my side of the bed. Stood next to me. Pissing on the floor!

The man is my H. I was absolutely shocked and I’m not a deep sleeper so knew what I was seeing was right

I quickly jumped up and screamed at him to stop. He went to try and carry on. I screamed again and then I cried (these are new carpets!).

He sat on the bed next to me, genuinely concerned as to why I was crying. He then realised what was happening, like a confused state of amnesia or something, and ran out to grab tissue and clean it all up

He went back to sleep obviously very embarrassed and confused. He was really really confused

What on earth is going on?! I said to him before he went back to sleep that he needs some sort of help, that’s not normal.

He said nothing like this has ever happened before.

Well, no, he’s never done a wee on the floor next to me in the bedroom! But he does quite a few weird things sometimes. The other week he got me a phone case. Said I was ridiculously for choosing the colour I did and that I was unbelievable. He kept going on and on! I then realised he looked like he was glazed over and not really him

He has told me to fucking sort my life out. When asked why, as this is midnight when I would’ve been sleeping for a while, he said ‘You don’t even train anymore. To be the best, you need to get out there with that ball at all hours’ 😒

Another time he’s fallen asleep on the sofa and come up here. I was putting on fresh sheets and he said ‘Why aren’t these in yet? You lazy bitch’. and then started wittering on some crazy stuff like ‘You need help. My maid from the 4 Season’s has his sheets done by Gloria. She is great. I wonder what sheets these are. Any idea of their thread count?’

Surely this is some sort of sleep walking behaviour? I’ve been married 8 years. My husband has never ever called me a bitch. He’s never called me lazy! He is incredibly confused when he Comes round and is embarrassed and sometimes a bit in disbelief because he just doesn’t remember

It is new behaviour. Started about 3 weeks ago and it really annoys me. And now I am quite angry!

Are you sure he hasn't been prescribed any new meds, especially sleeping pills or psych meds? Or maybe found an old packet and takes one occasionally when he can't sleep...

Some people have gone out and driven their cars after taking ambien/zolpidem, never mind what you're saying...

Sounds more like this than psychosis (having been around people with both).

Based on what?

Its perfectly normal to want to chat about it with other people. To get wider spectrum of experiences and also for comfort.

Doubtful. The onset of schizophrenia is mainly in adolescence to early twenties in men and presents with hallucinations (hearing voices, seeing things, smells), delusions (eg, the TV is telling you to do things or transmitting your thoughts). It also presents with other physical symptoms which would be very much in evidence. If it’s new behaviour it needs urgent attention because it’s likely something physical causing seizure like episodes.

So at a population level there aren't hoardes of 30 somethings suddenly starting with sleep seizures, sonambulism, changes in behaviour caused by tumours. But if you look at those for whom this symptom starts suddenly, this is a possible cause (obviously as well as a more innocuous one).

Look, people on the the thread have said relatives presented this way. Doctors have said it's a possibility. I have both medical training and have done more reading about brain tumours than I ever intended thanks to my own. I'm not sure why posters are accusing others of scaremongering when it is a real, if unpalatable differential. They need to have the symptoms investigated fully via the GP. Hopefully it's absolutely nothing. But people aren't scaremongering

You poor thing. I think the answer is here: "He lives an incredibly stressful lifestyle. We have 2 disabled children. And he works full time in a professional role. I’m their main carer but he too does a very fair share so it is hard work."

I think you need to get a GP appointment as soon as possible to get a physical examination (eg. blood tests) so that a physical ailment can be ruled out or found. I do not know much about these things at all, but I think stress works in ways we cannot fathom, because stress does not work logically. I think he is maybe internalising the stress and it has found a way out (for want of a better expression).

Good luck to you all. xxx

ambien/zolpidem causes this, made me really nasty and say bizarre things. especially if you drink. even the next day after taking one if you drink they can send you funny.

He needs a head scan I'd be extremely worried that there is a brain tumour ( obviously that's absolute worse case scenario) but needs to be investigated

If it is possible seizures does he need to be careful about driving (if he drives)

This sounds like narcolepsy. I have similar where I wake up and am convinced I see stuff like massive spiders crawling over my bed or weird shapes in the air. I sleep walk and also suffer from sleep paralysis. It’s horrible. Definitely book him a GP appointment-he may need to attend a sleep clinic?

You're very dramatic, aren't you? Maybe the root of his stress is being married to you?

My DB did something similar a few years back - turned out to be related to a toxic build up from either his liver or kidneys not functioning properly. It caused an infection in the lining of his brain and some really out of character behavior.

is it some form of breakdown due to stress?

Not scaremongering. This behaviour is new, so the likelihood is that something organic like a tumour or brain injury/disorder is causing the symptoms. It’s highlighting to OP that she needs to see GP or get him to A&E as a matter of urgency to rule it out and get to the root cause.

NO. Don’t guess conditions. Potentially a number of causes
It needs investigation not speculation

My exes grandad started doing this kind of odd stuff. Post humously turned out to be a tumour. About 5 weeks after symptoms started he had a massive bleed on the brain and just died in his living room in the middle of the day.

Hopefully ops DH is now under medical care.

I might be tempted to call 111. They will tell you what to do. Maybe they will say you just need to wait and see your GP but I think I'd still call.
Poor guy and poor you. Thats quite scary.

My husband is a bit like this if he is extremely stressed or not very well. He typically sleeps very deeply and I've sometimes found him lost and confused scrabbling round a wardrobe thinking he can't get into the bathroom, or he will open all the curtains at 3am and tell me to get up. When he's looking after himself it doesn't happen. Worth getting checked out but it doesn't necessarily mean anything sinister - but if he's very stressed he might need to look at how he can decompress.

Depends what search terms you use. OP l have experience of a family member in his late thirties who went through something similar three years ago. It turned out to be a benign tumour pressing on an area of his brain which controlled certain functions and resulted in similar symptoms as your DH. It was removed and it took a bit of time for a full recovery, but he’s fine now. I’m not telling you this to scare you, but to highlight the fact that a doctor needs to rule out similar causes and get to the bottom of it. New onset symptoms like his need urgent attention.

How is this helpful ? OP is worried and clearly stressed out by what’s going on, and you obviously have no inkling that the cause could be very serious. She came to MN for advice and your post is akin to a kick in the teeth.

You say he didn't have this in childhood that you know of - have either of you asked his parents,?

I get night terrors. I've kind of learned to wake myself up now but it's not always possible.

My family wasn't very aware or talkative, but there are two tales from my childhood that I can either recall or was told about as funny stories that do seem to be the same sort of thing. One was when on holiday I went into my parents' room in the middle of the night, sat on the suitcase and did a wee (my night terrors often involve weeing, it's very annoying!) and the other I took my teddy into my parents' room, gave it to my mum and said "it's just a book".

So, those things might be there but no reason to have told you. My partner knows about my current night terrors but I've never felt the need to talk about the ones in childhood.

I’ve managed to stop my partner on 3 separate occasions (over around 15 years in this house) going for a wee in his wardrobe or the storage cupboard right outside our bedroom door!
we have an ensuite which is to the left of his side of the bed - the wardrobe and storage door is to the right - I’ve usually redirected him to the right way and he has had a wee and then comes back to bed with NO memory of it!

He may mumble but usually can’t make sense of the words. Usually happened when he is stressed or has lots going on and then in a very deep sleep.

This 100%. However unpalatable the thought of a brain tumour is, the symptoms suggest it as a possible diagnosis, so the sooner it’s ruled out the better. Sorry to hear of your own experience - hope all is well with you now.

Don’t you see how crass your reply is? Imagine you are in the OP shoes before you write, then re-read what you have just written so flippantly. Sensitivity-bypass.

Could he have been drinking more than you think when he has these episodes?