Friend very angry that I’m on Mounjaro

[Sawingwood]

My friend is tall and willowy, never has to watch what she eats. She prides herself on being slim and the ability wear whatever she likes (tight catsuits, very short skirts etc).
Im the opposite. Short and dumpy, size 18. Desperately needing to turn the hunger button off I’ve resorted to ordering Mounjaro after a lot of reading around the subject.
Friend has hit the roof! Says that it’s cheating and a quick fix and it won’t stay off. That I should eat healthier and exercise more and that’s why I’m fat. Yes, it probably is but I don’t have her genetics either. Says she thinks it’s disgusting that people are using this quick fix etc. On and on. I’m a bit shocked and sad to be honest.
I don’t want to think Ill of her but I wonder if she’s actually worried I’ll be slim myself one day so she won’t be the slim one of the two. Anyone else had this? Don’t know what to do going forward!

Congratulations 👏🏻 👏🏻 👏🏻 and I'm sorry for the reaction!

Well, you want to take these meds, and she has expressed negativity, so the most comfortable way for you to view that is to jump to the conclusion she has an ulterior motive. That way you are able to dismiss her concerns and carry on with what you want to do. However, whatever her own shape and size, she has made some points worthy of consideration so I'd be wary of attributing the worst motives to her. She is your friend, and taking pride in her own appearance and caring about you are not mutually exclusive. The best thing you can do is be very clear you've made an informed decision taking into account all the disadvantages and risks, then explain to her that's what you've done and you will have to agree to differ.

Tell her to eff off and mind her own bloody business, it's your body. not hers and you can do what you want with it!

I agree with you, she's jealous and worried that one day you'll be slim too.

She sounds like a right prat to me!

Good luck with Mounjaro, lose as much weight as you reasonable can and show her who is BOSS!

Exactly my thoughts.

@PeriIsKickingMyButt it is a diabetic medication!
The brand name is Mountjaro but the medication is Tirzepatide.

Look at the adverse reactions....I wouldn't be taking this....unless I was closely monitored by an endocrinologist who has prescribed the correct dose etc

@PeriIsKickingMyButt you can get it 'prescribed' by a pharmacist online...you send a photograph in and your BMI (so you can lie) and bob's your uncle....your on Mountjaro!

Or just being devil's advocate here, could she genuinely be concerned about your health? Has she suggested healthy eating and exercise in the past to you? She is right in that if weight comes off quick, it is harder to keep off. Slow and steady definitely wins the race. Maybe tell her that you are using the mounjaro to kick start your weight loss alongside changing your lifestyle, if she isn't supportive then you have your answer as to whether she is a good friend or not.
Good luck on your weight loss 😊

Literally says friend doesn't have to watch what she eats. So ye s it is genetics.

And then she says how the friend eats small portions of healthy meals.

Nah. It's word to be annoyed. Would it make sense to be annoyed at people who are genetically slim if you watched what you are and trained all the time? Or if you studied really hard would you be annoyed at people who ate naturally smarter than you? Or those who are better looking than you with no effort. Or those who have a clean house because they pay for a cleaner and you don't?

Just weird

OP says the friend doesn't watch what she eats, but also says the friend mainly eats small portions of stir fries and salads... it's not like the friend is smashing a dominoes every day but staying thin regardless!

I've never heard of manjaro but if it's a quick fix I'd be concerned if you were my friend too. It sounds like you don't think highly of your friends opinion and that's entirely up to you. Knlybyou know your friend but the way you speak is it time you were no longer friends? Because if I thought my friend was angry at me loosing weight and I honestly thought it's because she didn't want me to also be thin I wouldn't be friends with that person. ( I've tried loosing weight myself a few times because I'm a 16 and constantly feel big. My friends are very encouraging when I do it. I usually get down to a 12 then think oh I'm ok now and then eventually I'm a 16 again.) Only you know your friend though

I'm not sure it has much to do with genetics. Nobody in my family is overweight, except me. I am very overweight and it's because I eat too much and don't do enough exercise. I know that some people have medical issues, but they are in the minority. Dieting is so hard.

For some people they don't experience the hunger pangs that lead to binging or poor dietary choices as severely as others though.

I'm related to people like this who have the luxury of choice, when they fancy a binge they can and it not affect them, and they just never crave food to the point of pain.

I'm sadly not one of these people and feeling hungry causes me so much pain, I genuinely don't have an off switch once I've started.

It doesn't matter whether that's because I've got a lack of will power or motivation which is down to hormones any way like dopamine, or whether they've got an excess of it, that's genetic.

Some people get weird when others lose weight. It usually has to do with their own fragile egos. They may be used to being the ‘slim one’ in the friendship. Some people do work at staying slim but there are people, especially if they are young, that are just lucky. If someone else can lose weight in a manner they perceive as ‘easy’ they feel it threatens their perception that they have worked at it. When the reality is I bet mounjara is not a quick fix. I’m not familiar with it but I’m guessing there are caveats and it’s not just a case of taking it and boom the weight comes off without any other lifestyle changes. Like gastric bypass. It’s not a quick fix. People have to go on a very restricted (liquid at first) diet and risk extreme nausea and sickness if they eat the wrong thing or the wrong quantity.

Why is it any of her business? Guaranteed she's not thin naturally, she'll be secretly obsessive about eating, calorie intake etc. Hate jealous people!!

I agree with this. The vast majority of us work quite hard at staying slim and might view these jabs as the easy option (side effects aside). That said you’ll have to work hard on your eating/fitness to keep it off.

Or she might not want competition from you? Only you can know which it is.

Actual pain? I’ve never heard of that before.

Plenty of people do but still maintain a healthy weight. I am not one of them. But I know people who are labelled as naturally thin who do, they just prioritise their health.

Some conditions do increase cravings, make use more lethargic and make it harder. But a lot of the time it’s not hormones or being genetically lucky etc, it’s habits and lifestyles people have developed overtime.

Anyone who, consistently, eats more calories than they need will put weight on. Someone who eats less calories than they need will lose weight.

People who have a an occasional binge and seem to have not impact are not having an impact because it’s occasional. Their binge would have to be tens of thousands of calories over what they need to have a noticeable difference. Those of us that are overweight are, basically, bingeing everyday.

I can see how the friend overreacted, but we are also getting one side of the story from OP and I don’t know how much of it is their perception of what was said.

I also don’t understand all the hate towards slim people. So many posters accusing slim people of jealousy in a theoretical situation where someone might lose weight… again it makes me wonder how much of this is projection. We are not all 12 years old, spending our days assessing our appearance compared to our friends! And people actually saying things like, oh OP I bet you’re prettier than her - wtf, what an odd way of thinking!

And lastly, genuinely effortlessly slim people are very rare. Most work hard at staying slim - OP’s friend included.

Obesity is a medical condition like many others and can lead to a number of life-threatening conditions later in life, yet it's still something that people feel the need to be judgemental about. Yes, as a nation we've gained weight - for many and varied reasons (more sedantry lifestyle, jobs that require greater time sitting at a desk, using cars instead of walking, easy access to 'bad' food such as takeaways etc. It's about the only medical condition that people are determined to shame sufferers into tackling alone. "It's easy to lose weight, eat less, move more", "stop dodging salads", "you're not hungry, you just think you are, try brushing your teeth/drinking a glass of water/getting a hobby to take your mind off food " No one says to a smoker, don't use patches, you should kick it by natural methods. No one says to a drug addict, use some willpower. No one says to a gambling addict, do something else to take your mind off it.
If science has created something that can help make a person happier and healthier surely that is great for the individual and society? It's not cheating, it's helping yourself to live your best life.

Yes, that's true, but none of that negates what I said (in my opinion). Whether the friend doesn't feel hunger much, or whether it's a daily battle for her, I think it's disingenuous for the OP to say her friend eats whatever she wants/doesn't watch what she eats when she is predominantly eating a diet which would make most people slim!!

are there scary stories about it? I don’t even know what it is.
a tall skinny person I knew had a heart attack as they ate all sorts of junk and didn’t exercise yet they were slim. Arteries clogged up though.

it could also be jealousy that they don’t want you to change and be slim to compete with them. Some slim people like having a fat friend.

tell her that you are just eating better and exercising and not mention the thing again and see if that makes her happy

It is harder to loose weight as you get older. I am mid forties, peri menopausal with a dodgy knee and ankle myself. My children are also 2/8 years old; which makes it harder as I have little time to myself. I have always struggled with weight and kept it off through to be honest hard graft throughout my adult years until I got pregnant the first time 9 years ago. I have lost a stone recently, but have another 4 stone minimum to go. It is harder now in my mid forties; but worthwhile getting myself back to a healthy and fit pre child self.

It is a choice I get it...but just make sure you do your research and get it prescribed, so your getting necessary health checks to ensure it's safe continued use 👍. But also consider a bit of weight gain is part of aging; our bodies also need less calories too. Consider will you take this medication on and off for life to keep weight at bay? As without lifestyle changes that what would be required; if you didn't neutralise your calorie intake; the weight would creep on again 👍

Good luck though lovely. It is hard 👍

@NikNak321

Thank you
I Appreciate that