Can you help with a polite one liner to stop these conversations with SILs?

[User1974]

I am very close to DBs and very different to SILs in personality but we all get on ok. I have a specific style which I wear day in day out - and have for 35 years. SIL both love shopping, especially for clothes and discuss clothes a lot, I am not involved in these discussions.

The last 3 times I have seen them together they have tried to arrange a "make over" for me. I get it, they think I wear old stuff and need some pizzazz, but it is just not my style. Also make up, which I do not and have never worn. Also, I have MS and mobility issues and what I wear works for me, I am very very busy.

I have smiled and been sort of evasive but now they are offering dates for my big "make over" and they are super excited. What can I say to firmly but politely tell them, thanks but no thanks.

Can you just laugh at them gently and say "Come off it, you've known me 35 years, do you seriously think if I wanted a makeover I wouldn't have had one by now?" and change the subject?

I think given your profession, if you wanted to expand on reasoning, rather than just saying no (my vote is just to say no ad nauseum), you might want to say something along the lines of, Im happy with my look, as you know successful businesswomen usually have a consistent look/brands they go to and Ive tailored mine to my look

Something wanky like that.

that remark sounds like jealousy

You’re a very tolerant woman.

Botox has also been suggested to me!
I did shut that down with "You know, I am not keen to paralyse bits of my face, I mean, the MS is going to do that for me soon enough eh"

DB scolded me for being a bitch because she was genuinely being nice and thinks Botox is the bees knees but just STFU eh?😂

You're very generous OP, sounds too placating to me, but you need to handle it the way you know is best

I would take pity on them and offer them make-unders. Say you'll lock their makeup bags away for a weekend. Make them two big badges with "Au Naturel" written on them and insist they wear them for the duration.

Oh they are so much fun to play with. You could have so much fun and then tell us all about it😂. ‘Cottage business’ 😂🤦‍♀️ ha ha.

I am, it is very helpful in business. The mansplaining a physically small disabled woman experiences in the business world is utterly hilarious. I have learned to use it to my advantage.

Yes I was just thinking, theres money to be had in this isnt there OP, what about an anonymous blog, about how businesswomen are seen by other women/their family, telling stories of family members with lack of awareness/utter rudeness

It would be very funny

OP, the problem is that this reply leaves the gate open. This month, you're busy, but you're entertaining the thought (and leaving it to them to entertain the thought) that you'll be up for it later. You're blaming time rather than saying you don't want it at all.

The thought stresses you out doesn't cover it either, since it leaves it to them to reassure you, oh, no, it'll be fine, you'll see, you'll have a good time.

Love this, I'd go with this, but then I'm too old and snarky to be oooh so polite these days.

'What about me is unacceptable to you?' Watch them back peddle. Or if they give examples then say. 'I don't dress for you, I dress for me and I'm happy with that'

This is a great response. Polite but firm.

I don’t know why you can’t just say no and that you find it a bit rude.

Exactly this

Listen little SILs, just to remind you this make over isnt happening, Im sure you can find another victim, erm I mean participant 😉

Your outfit sounds class! No shame in having one decent bag, would much rather that than 10’s of cheap ones.

I love getting dressed up but also love my comfy clothes, depends on my mood.

I don’t get why people would want o police others clothes/style, I enjoy seeing the way my friends family and work mates dress and express themselves, and value them as friends not just for their style, even if I wouldn’t wear some of the outfits they choose.

Yes, it is tempting. DS and DD struggle with it all and want to brag about my success but they are forbidden. I am honest when asked but say nothing. SIL tried to recruit me to Tropic Skincare to 'Boost my income" last year - that was a testing one I tell ya! 😂
But I said I was busy and didn't have any personal social media so I would be no use to her. And bought some of that soap on a rope from her and said how lovely it was and useful.
Just be nice1974, always be nice.

I like the Japanese way, stay cool, stay calm, be as pleasant as possible.

"I'm sorry that you don't like my dress sense, but everyone's different and I don't require any styling tips." Then if that falls on deaf ears...
"I have no desire to dress like you, it's not to my taste at all and frankly I think you look awful"
Lol

You’re far too polite and your brother is a dick.

Yip polite isn't hitting home.
A more forceful approach required.
I don't want a fucking makeover so kindly drop it.

“No thanks”.

and repeat constantly

Your Kenzo trousers outfit sounds fab, I'm infinitely less keen on their tiered maxi dresses.

Wonder how they will reply?

I live the sound of your style, very chic! In my minds eye I am imagining them as the 2 ugly sisters!! He he he

I find it so rude they are saying this to you- it’s quite the slight. I’d be hurt/furious.

One of my employees was randomly at a restaurant we were in about a month ago and came over to say Hi. She had just been given a new set of clients and, basically, it was a career changer for her, she is now exactly where she always wanted to be.

She was gushing and thanking me and I was saying "No no, this is all you, you earned it" and she started crying and hugging me - I have known her since she started on reception at 14 and she is now 23 and doing very well and she was a few drinks in 😂. When she eventually left SIL asked if she was mentally ill 😂😂I said "No, no, she is just excited about her new project" and SIL kept on prodding it "She seemed blind drunk, it's only 2pm" "How long have you known her, she seems unstable, does she deal with cash at all" etc etc. She's just very limited in her understanding of people and thinks everyone would be much better off if they were more like her and you know, less themselves.

SIL2 is not nearly as bad but has said I dress like "a 90 year old woman" on more than one occasion. I replied "that's exactly what I am aiming for" 😂