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WWYD about lying hairdresser?

488 replies

CharDee · 26/05/2024 21:16

I was bridesmaid at a wedding yesterday. The bride wanted to spend the morning with her mum and sister who is MOH and then the bridesmaids turn up at 12 for photos and to get dressed. All bridesmaids were asked to do their own hair and makeup so before Christmas I booked with my regular hair dresser for her to do my hair and makeup yesterday morning. My appointment was at 9. I have been going to the same hairdresser for the past 7 years and go roughly every 3 months for a colour and book hair/make up for special occasions because I am genuinely terrible at styling my own hair! It’s something that she knows and often jokes about! I also don’t own much makeup as I don’t wear it often.

On Friday night just after 11 I got a message from my hairdresser to say it was her husband messaging and that she was currently in a&e very unwell, would likely be there for hours as she hadn’t been seen yet and she needed to cancel my appointment. Obviously I replied and thanked him for letting me know and sent my well wishes.

Being ill is completely unavoidable and although it inconvenienced me, I was more concerned about her health. The late hour meant that I couldn’t get in touch with anyone else and even though I did call a few local salons as soon as they opened on Saturday morning, the only appointment was one late in the afternoon.

I managed to do my own hair, just straightened it and put a nice clip in. I put a bit of makeup on but it didn’t look that good! The other bridesmaids are completely different skin tones so they were able to help a little. I felt a bit rubbish but had a good time anyway, just didn’t feel very special! I have very low self esteem at the moment and felt so washed out standing with the stunning bride and beautiful bridesmaids. It really hasn’t helped.

Whilst waiting for the reception I was on instagram and saw a friend’s story. She had gone on her hen do abroad that morning. She shared photos of the airport which were from 6:30 in the morning and she’s there with all her friends all posing with drinks. My hairdresser was one of them. It’s definitely her and we have both spoken about hen do friend being a mutual friend. I went on to friends Facebook profile and saw they’d all been for a meal and then stayed in an apartment the night before and hairdresser was in the photos but not tagged. There was a video of the hen doing something that was posted at 11:30 and hairdresser is there in the background laughing with someone else. In the actual video the hen said something about it being nearly midnight and how she needed her beauty sleep.

I paid a 50% deposit for my appointment and in the message her husband said that she would transfer the deposit to my next appointment which is booked for a few weeks time for a colour. I am a regular customer and this appointment was made months ago. If she had double booked herself and said she had this hen do then I would have understood and had time to book elsewhere. Instead she has lied about it and left me completely stuck.

Would you contact her when she’s back from the hen do and ask her about it? Would you cancel the upcoming appointment? Would you just let it go?

I’m trying to work out a scenario where she hasn’t lied but she was hardly going to be able to do my hair whilst on a flight to Ibiza even if she wasn’t ill.

OP posts:
babasaclover · 26/05/2024 22:08

CharDee · 26/05/2024 21:52

*sorry posted too early

Planned for a while and she was tagged in something about it last week. But last weekend I'd messaged about the time as I couldn't remember if it was 9 or 9:30.

I really am taking it somewhat personally! I feel like she's been unnecessarily unkind and I genuinely felt so ugly yesterday.

I won't message until she's back and will think about how to call her out and get my money back. I have left her so many lovely reviews and always recommend her and I just feel like such an idiot.

You're not an idiot. You're a kind person who rewards hard work with good reviews. She on the other hand is awful.

OneFrenchEgg · 26/05/2024 22:10

Are the Insta posts in real time? My adult teens often do a load of posts when they are back rather than as it happens.
If so I'd just message that you assume she is ok and made an excuse to cover forgetting to cancel. If she's good at hair I wouldn't change hairdressers tbh.

Datafan55 · 26/05/2024 22:12

I know it's not the same but I'm sure you looked lovely, honestly.

But she meanwhile should have been honest. Really sounds like she'd forgotten until you texted her about the time. But even a week MIGHT have been enough to find someone else for at least hair or make-up, and you might have slept better without a mad change of plan the night beofre.

Definitely screenshot, and honestly I'd probably send it to her with no words. Or 'Terrible waits in A&E then, was it three days you spent there?'

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Datafan55 · 26/05/2024 22:14

OneFrenchEgg · 26/05/2024 22:10

Are the Insta posts in real time? My adult teens often do a load of posts when they are back rather than as it happens.
If so I'd just message that you assume she is ok and made an excuse to cover forgetting to cancel. If she's good at hair I wouldn't change hairdressers tbh.

Oh that's a good point actually.

TheAlternativeIsWorse · 26/05/2024 22:15

Petesbowtie9 · 26/05/2024 21:27

Just say you are really sorry but you need to cancel your upcoming appointment as you’ll be in Ibiza on a hen do …

Yep!

CoffeeBeansGalore · 26/05/2024 22:18

Get a refund. Then send her the screenshot pics she's in & comment A&E looks a lot more fun than it used to.

CJ0374 · 26/05/2024 22:18

Imagine if you had been the bride and not the bridesmaid!!!

I have my phone on silent after a certain time, so wouldn't have even read a message at 11pm! Terrible treatment of a regular customer. Get your money back and find a new one. She isn't worth the stress!

vipersnest1 · 26/05/2024 22:29

I'd message her straight away, saying you know what's gone on and as she's completely lost your trust you want the deposit back - and that you've got screenshots of what's happened if you need to use them.
Then never use her again as a hairdresser.

CharDee · 26/05/2024 22:33

It definitely was in real time. I was trying to work out if maybe she had been to a&e and then joined the group at the airport but even still, she wouldn't have been able to do my hair.

I just can't understand why, even if it was something she'd forgotten about, she couldn't just let me know even earlier on Friday that she had plans. I'd have been annoyed at the short notice but I could have gone out and bought makeup, arranged for a friend to help out, scrambled for an appointment somewhere, had a chance to practice some hair styles or watch some tutorials.

I feel really let down and hurt.

OP posts:
hattie43 · 26/05/2024 22:36

Awful . I hope you find another hairdresser . I wouldn't go back and give her my custom after that .

Datafan55 · 26/05/2024 22:58

I was trying to work out if maybe she had been to a&e and then joined the group at the airport but even still, she wouldn't have been able to do my hair.

Even if she did that, she was not 'very unwell'. You don't generally go to A&e and then head straight off on a hen weekend.

ManilowBarry · 26/05/2024 22:59

How utterly immature and unprofessional.

Do not ever line her pockets again and once your deposit is returned leave a review.

Unreliable, immature and unprofessional. She messaged me pretending to be her husband to say she was in A&E and would have to cancel my appointment the next morning, only to see on Facebook the next day that she was partying with a mutual friend on the friends Hen night and off to Ibiza the next day!

Irishmama100 · 26/05/2024 23:04

That is just terrible, refund and a bad review!

Oblomov24 · 26/05/2024 23:05

What a shame. This shows her true nature.

MissingMoominMamma · 26/05/2024 23:06

Just ask for your deposit back. Don’t send screenshots.

When you’ve got your money, you can thank her and say that the hen do looked fun.

That will be enough.

likepebblesonabeach · 26/05/2024 23:10

That really is awful op. It's bad enough for her to lie but when she knew how important the appt was is beyond it.
Please don't take it personally this is absolutely not a reflection on you.
I'd be tempted to comment on the post just so she knows you know what a liar she actually is.

VJBR · 26/05/2024 23:15

Really unprofessional. I can understand you being hurt. Do keep us updated.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 27/05/2024 00:54

I would screenshot all of the posts and pics with her in, before they are deleted or expired.

Then I'd message her asking her to refund the 50% deposit in full.

Then I'd just not turn up to your booked appointment. Unless, she goes on about not refunding the deposit and carrying it over, then tell her you do not want it carried over and you want a refund for the appointment that you've paid 50% but had cancelled.

I'd only let her know you know once you've your money back. Depends on how much it is really as to whether it's worth reclaiming from small claims or MCOL.

I'd NEVER go back to her....OR if you don't get your deposit back, you could maybe go to your next appointment, then after your hair is done, refuse to pay the final 50%, but then if she happened to take you to small claims/MCOL you'd likely be classed as being in the wrong for that.

But yeah, NEVER go back to her. Lying cow, could have been truthful and cancelled with enough notice for you to find someone else, that's the really shitty bit of her behaviour.

spov · 27/05/2024 01:05

MissingMoominMamma · 26/05/2024 23:06

Just ask for your deposit back. Don’t send screenshots.

When you’ve got your money, you can thank her and say that the hen do looked fun.

That will be enough.

I agree.
get the deposit back
dont use her ever again - I’d ghost her.
the lying is appalling.

and repair your confidence.
I bet you looked really nice
you don’t need her services

marie3e · 27/05/2024 01:10

Say how was A and E I mean THE HEN DO ?

DreamTheMoors · 27/05/2024 03:42

I would send her a screenshot of the photo she’s in at the hen.
Underneath, “Send me the refund of £££ by way of (whatever bank, etc. you use).
Thank you.
No pleases.

I think calling people out on their bullshit lies is not only necessary, it’s good for the soul.

Fraaahnces · 27/05/2024 04:26

I would cancel your next appointment stating that you have a “hen’s trip abroad” and ask to be refunded immediately - send the photo of her at the airport.

DracoDormiensNumquamTittilandum · 27/05/2024 05:29

That's appalling for her to to do anyone let alone a client of many years! More fool her, she's lost a very good client and tarnished her reputation.

hereistopositiveenergy · 27/05/2024 06:53

“Morning, I know you’ve said you would move my deposit to my future appointment but I would prefer if you could make arrangement's to send it back and also cancel my next appointment. My bank details are SC & AC. Enjoy XCountry for Ys hen.’

tbh I would send this and then be done with it. I know when I’ve had appointments for hair or makeup which have been cancelled last minute for events it’s impacted my time as you feel so deflated never mind factoring in the lies you’ve been told because why would you question an A&E visit after all.

Treatwell is somewhere I’ve used before to find a new beautician or hairdresser when I’ve moved. It might be worth looking there or speaking to friends where they go.

Trunkybum · 27/05/2024 07:37

i really feel for you OP. I’ve been bridesmaid at a few weddings in the last couple of years and would feel so low if I had to do my own hair and makeup for this reason whilst everyone else looked gorgeous- although I’m sure you still did, and your sister would be proud to have you there either way.
I would absolutely message the hairdresser when things have settled and let her you you feel really let down that she left you in that position. That you would have understood and could have made other arrangements if you’d known. Then I’d ask for my deposit back and let her know I’d be finding an alternative stylist in future.