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Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

WWYD about lying hairdresser?

488 replies

CharDee · 26/05/2024 21:16

I was bridesmaid at a wedding yesterday. The bride wanted to spend the morning with her mum and sister who is MOH and then the bridesmaids turn up at 12 for photos and to get dressed. All bridesmaids were asked to do their own hair and makeup so before Christmas I booked with my regular hair dresser for her to do my hair and makeup yesterday morning. My appointment was at 9. I have been going to the same hairdresser for the past 7 years and go roughly every 3 months for a colour and book hair/make up for special occasions because I am genuinely terrible at styling my own hair! It’s something that she knows and often jokes about! I also don’t own much makeup as I don’t wear it often.

On Friday night just after 11 I got a message from my hairdresser to say it was her husband messaging and that she was currently in a&e very unwell, would likely be there for hours as she hadn’t been seen yet and she needed to cancel my appointment. Obviously I replied and thanked him for letting me know and sent my well wishes.

Being ill is completely unavoidable and although it inconvenienced me, I was more concerned about her health. The late hour meant that I couldn’t get in touch with anyone else and even though I did call a few local salons as soon as they opened on Saturday morning, the only appointment was one late in the afternoon.

I managed to do my own hair, just straightened it and put a nice clip in. I put a bit of makeup on but it didn’t look that good! The other bridesmaids are completely different skin tones so they were able to help a little. I felt a bit rubbish but had a good time anyway, just didn’t feel very special! I have very low self esteem at the moment and felt so washed out standing with the stunning bride and beautiful bridesmaids. It really hasn’t helped.

Whilst waiting for the reception I was on instagram and saw a friend’s story. She had gone on her hen do abroad that morning. She shared photos of the airport which were from 6:30 in the morning and she’s there with all her friends all posing with drinks. My hairdresser was one of them. It’s definitely her and we have both spoken about hen do friend being a mutual friend. I went on to friends Facebook profile and saw they’d all been for a meal and then stayed in an apartment the night before and hairdresser was in the photos but not tagged. There was a video of the hen doing something that was posted at 11:30 and hairdresser is there in the background laughing with someone else. In the actual video the hen said something about it being nearly midnight and how she needed her beauty sleep.

I paid a 50% deposit for my appointment and in the message her husband said that she would transfer the deposit to my next appointment which is booked for a few weeks time for a colour. I am a regular customer and this appointment was made months ago. If she had double booked herself and said she had this hen do then I would have understood and had time to book elsewhere. Instead she has lied about it and left me completely stuck.

Would you contact her when she’s back from the hen do and ask her about it? Would you cancel the upcoming appointment? Would you just let it go?

I’m trying to work out a scenario where she hasn’t lied but she was hardly going to be able to do my hair whilst on a flight to Ibiza even if she wasn’t ill.

OP posts:
ClairDeLaLune · 27/05/2024 13:25

Ah OP you and your DH and your niece all sound lovely. What you said about what they did for you made me cry! You’re worth so much more than that rotten old hairdresser! That was a great message you sent her, don’t forget to leave that review when you’ve got your money back.

Crankyaboutfood · 27/05/2024 13:25

NippyCrab · 26/05/2024 21:28

That's awful, she has totally let you down! You could've gotten someone else booked if she had just been honest. Text back and say you want the 50% refunded and that you are disappointed she couldn't have been honest with you. Instead you had to see it on social media. Nasty work. Hugs OP.

Yes. I would just be straightforward and I would not use her again. Annoying, but she handled this so poorly and no kindness. I could not sit in her chair as if nothing happened.

Crankyaboutfood · 27/05/2024 13:29

Should have finished reading first. You messaged well and this hairdresser doesn’t deserve any access to your beautiful life.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Karmaisagod · 27/05/2024 13:35

Posting just to say that your DH's behaviour had brought a tear to my eye. What a lovely man. You are lucky to have one another.

Zonder · 27/05/2024 13:35

Wow OP your DH is a catch
I read this back and it sounds sarcastic but it's not. He sounds wonderful.

pikkumyy77 · 27/05/2024 13:39

Really don’t give the photos another thought. I never wear makeup and so I didn’t bother even at my own wedding—didn’t occur to me. As a result I look horribly washed out in my own wedding pictures. The lighting and the contrast to other guests throws my lack of makeup into relief.

But I was still a beautiful bride—to my dh! The pictures are not real life. Real life is real life. Focus on that.

Boredandborder · 27/05/2024 13:41

I'm sure you looked lovelier than you think, it's just lack of self confidence, your husband obviously sees what you don't! Anyway, your message was perfect; direct, firm, polite. Well done.

More importantly, your husband and family sound lovely, so refreshing to read when so many women on MN seem to be stuck with some real stinkers!

Luxell934 · 27/05/2024 13:49

That’s really bad as if she had just been honest you could have found someone else to do your hair and makeup. It’s the little things that make us feel good and she totally fucked you over. Maybe she forgot and panicked and thought making up that ridiculous lie was her only option to save face.

Id message and just state that you’d like your deposit refunded asap and not to carry it over to your next appointment. Then just don’t book any future appointments. I’d just leave it at that, as much fun as it would be to send a snarky message I would take the classy approach.

CharDee · 27/05/2024 14:00

We have a reply!

“Heyy, sure I’ll send the refund over when I’m back. Need to double check how much it was you sent. Are you rearranging your next appointment?”

I’ve replied

“Thank you. It was £50 for the appointment you cancelled on Saturday and it was £30 for my upcoming appointment. The screenshots of the payments I made are in this chat, just above the messages from you last Sunday confirming my appointment and from your husband, late on Friday night, to tell me you were ill and had to cancel my appointment.

I will be rearranging my appointment with a different hairdresser, I’m afraid. As good as you are as a hairdresser and MUA, I’m not sure even in your best health you would have been able to style my hair and do my makeup to a good enough standard from a plane on its way to Ibiza.

Let me know when you’ve transferred the money back."

OP posts:
WaltzingWaters · 27/05/2024 14:05

Petesbowtie9 · 26/05/2024 21:27

Just say you are really sorry but you need to cancel your upcoming appointment as you’ll be in Ibiza on a hen do …

Brilliant!
A great response you sent though and I’m glad you’ve confronted her. As you said, it would have been fine if she had cancelled ages ago, but the lies and knowingly leaving you in the lurch was awful. Definitely finding someone more trustworthy is better.

abracadabra1980 · 27/05/2024 14:07

Petesbowtie9 · 26/05/2024 21:27

Just say you are really sorry but you need to cancel your upcoming appointment as you’ll be in Ibiza on a hen do …

🤣

Alwaysalwayscold · 27/05/2024 14:08

Great reply OP.

A hairdresser and client relationship needs mutual respect to work and unfortunately she showed a complete lack of respect to you. There are plenty of other great (and honest) hairdressers out there.

DollieBantrysPantry · 27/05/2024 14:08

CharDee · 27/05/2024 14:00

We have a reply!

“Heyy, sure I’ll send the refund over when I’m back. Need to double check how much it was you sent. Are you rearranging your next appointment?”

I’ve replied

“Thank you. It was £50 for the appointment you cancelled on Saturday and it was £30 for my upcoming appointment. The screenshots of the payments I made are in this chat, just above the messages from you last Sunday confirming my appointment and from your husband, late on Friday night, to tell me you were ill and had to cancel my appointment.

I will be rearranging my appointment with a different hairdresser, I’m afraid. As good as you are as a hairdresser and MUA, I’m not sure even in your best health you would have been able to style my hair and do my makeup to a good enough standard from a plane on its way to Ibiza.

Let me know when you’ve transferred the money back."

Fabulous reply and your husband is fabulous too 😊

Marmunia10667 · 27/05/2024 14:15

Is this someone whose name begins with L???

CharDee · 27/05/2024 14:18

Also, my niece and DH are just wonderful humans. I am so grateful for them both.

They have such a lovely relationship that is more like big brother, little sister than uncle and niece. She's had a tough few years and she came

We all support each other when we need it and DS who is 9 loves having her around.

OP posts:
pikkumyy77 · 27/05/2024 14:25

That text from you was absolutely legend!

stomachamelon · 27/05/2024 14:30

I love the message you sent!

theholesinmyapologies · 27/05/2024 14:59

I quite like the message you sent to her reply; makes it very clear that you know full well she not only let you down, she lied about it. Not even just 'ill', but A&E ill lie!

I'd not be shy about letting your friends know about it, too.

Dontbeme · 27/05/2024 15:16

CharDee · 27/05/2024 14:00

We have a reply!

“Heyy, sure I’ll send the refund over when I’m back. Need to double check how much it was you sent. Are you rearranging your next appointment?”

I’ve replied

“Thank you. It was £50 for the appointment you cancelled on Saturday and it was £30 for my upcoming appointment. The screenshots of the payments I made are in this chat, just above the messages from you last Sunday confirming my appointment and from your husband, late on Friday night, to tell me you were ill and had to cancel my appointment.

I will be rearranging my appointment with a different hairdresser, I’m afraid. As good as you are as a hairdresser and MUA, I’m not sure even in your best health you would have been able to style my hair and do my makeup to a good enough standard from a plane on its way to Ibiza.

Let me know when you’ve transferred the money back."

OP can I be you when I grow up (I am currently 44 and 1/2) you absolute legend. That reply you sent is amazing.

fizzandchips · 27/05/2024 15:20

OP - you sound awesome and I bloody love that reply. You sound like the loveliest, supportive family and your husband obviously thinks the world of you. I wish you could see yourself as others see you - even on an anonymous forum you come across as a fab friend (to the bride - you didn’t make it about you) understanding client (when you thought your hairdresser was genuinely ill) and an incredible aunt.

SuncreamAndIceCream · 27/05/2024 15:25

Wedding make up is for the photos OP. I bet in person your make up was lovely and natural looking. It's just the pictures that make you look different.

I'm sorry your hairdresser let you down but your reply was perfect.

And your DH is amazing. What a good egg. Agree with others I bet your niece would love to do a makeover on you, that age group are all a dab hand at it.

Sprinklesandsprinkles · 27/05/2024 15:25

I also just want to say I'm bloody impressed with your reply!! I hope you tell us what her response is!

diddl · 27/05/2024 15:26

As good as you are as a hairdresser and MUA, I’m not sure even in your best health you would have been able to style my hair and do my makeup to a good enough standard from a plane on its way to Ibiza.

Fabulous!

I don't really wear make up.

Very rarely lippy & a touch of blusher.

I can see how that might look as if hadn't made much effort but that's who I am!

That would me doing my own make up as requested.

Op you probably looked lovely & natural.

If make up was important to the bride I think she should have booked & preferably paid for you all to have it done.

Have fun with your new stuff!

penjil · 27/05/2024 15:28

That's appalling.....she knew she was going away on that hen-do for ages, so had plenty of time to cancel your appointment!!

It's lack of decent manners and respect for others!

PuggyPuggyPuggy · 27/05/2024 15:30

CoffeeBeansGalore · 26/05/2024 22:18

Get a refund. Then send her the screenshot pics she's in & comment A&E looks a lot more fun than it used to.

😂