WWYD about lying hairdresser?

[CharDee]

I was bridesmaid at a wedding yesterday. The bride wanted to spend the morning with her mum and sister who is MOH and then the bridesmaids turn up at 12 for photos and to get dressed. All bridesmaids were asked to do their own hair and makeup so before Christmas I booked with my regular hair dresser for her to do my hair and makeup yesterday morning. My appointment was at 9. I have been going to the same hairdresser for the past 7 years and go roughly every 3 months for a colour and book hair/make up for special occasions because I am genuinely terrible at styling my own hair! It’s something that she knows and often jokes about! I also don’t own much makeup as I don’t wear it often.

On Friday night just after 11 I got a message from my hairdresser to say it was her husband messaging and that she was currently in a&e very unwell, would likely be there for hours as she hadn’t been seen yet and she needed to cancel my appointment. Obviously I replied and thanked him for letting me know and sent my well wishes.

Being ill is completely unavoidable and although it inconvenienced me, I was more concerned about her health. The late hour meant that I couldn’t get in touch with anyone else and even though I did call a few local salons as soon as they opened on Saturday morning, the only appointment was one late in the afternoon.

I managed to do my own hair, just straightened it and put a nice clip in. I put a bit of makeup on but it didn’t look that good! The other bridesmaids are completely different skin tones so they were able to help a little. I felt a bit rubbish but had a good time anyway, just didn’t feel very special! I have very low self esteem at the moment and felt so washed out standing with the stunning bride and beautiful bridesmaids. It really hasn’t helped.

Whilst waiting for the reception I was on instagram and saw a friend’s story. She had gone on her hen do abroad that morning. She shared photos of the airport which were from 6:30 in the morning and she’s there with all her friends all posing with drinks. My hairdresser was one of them. It’s definitely her and we have both spoken about hen do friend being a mutual friend. I went on to friends Facebook profile and saw they’d all been for a meal and then stayed in an apartment the night before and hairdresser was in the photos but not tagged. There was a video of the hen doing something that was posted at 11:30 and hairdresser is there in the background laughing with someone else. In the actual video the hen said something about it being nearly midnight and how she needed her beauty sleep.

I paid a 50% deposit for my appointment and in the message her husband said that she would transfer the deposit to my next appointment which is booked for a few weeks time for a colour. I am a regular customer and this appointment was made months ago. If she had double booked herself and said she had this hen do then I would have understood and had time to book elsewhere. Instead she has lied about it and left me completely stuck.

Would you contact her when she’s back from the hen do and ask her about it? Would you cancel the upcoming appointment? Would you just let it go?

I’m trying to work out a scenario where she hasn’t lied but she was hardly going to be able to do my hair whilst on a flight to Ibiza even if she wasn’t ill.

I was lied to by my hairdresser a few months ago and went through the same dilemma, I'd thought she was really nice but her behaviour in cancelling an appointment just before my holiday and then tripping up over her own story was just too much.
I've just found a replacement, but couldn't myself carry on going as I felt I'd never be able to trust her again sadly

You could @ her on IG (after your screenshot) and make a comment about being glad she was feeling better.

Send screenshots ask for full refund and suggest clearly she should have just cancelled you and you could have found someone else. The way she did it lost her a client.

Instead of anything so passive aggressive as lot of suggestions seem to be why don’t you just message her when she gets back and say how disappointed you are in the fact that she felt she had to lie, and that you would’ve understood. Then ask for a refund and go elsewhere in future

She’s behaved very unprofessionally. Like you said, just cancel with notice ajd apologise.

The A&E story is awful

Had this too regular hairdresser who I really liked how she did my hair… once I’d had a baby she messed me around bad and cancelled on me, I rebooked it for another day (had to rearrange child care) and then she slipped up what she’d done and you know when someone is lying they like backtrack then over explain!
I binned her off after that.. I need reliability and I don’t like the lying .. and now she’s preg herself I think I hope no one messes her about when she’s had her baby cos it’s far harder to simply pop out the hairdressers or your nails etc!
Get your money back and find a new person..

Op, I was effectively dumped by my hairdresser of many years. I kept ringing her when she didn't turn up because I thought something had happened to her. Before this she was getting later and later, leaving me sitting in all day. I look back and wonder why on earth I put up with it. I later found out she had done it to a number of clients (freelance). My DH told me I wasn't to ring her again and I didn't.

I saw another freelancer advertise, booked her, she turned up on time - not two hours late. She did my hair for 20 years until she finished hairdressing.

She recommended a few other hairdressers who she knew would treat me professionally and he has been coming to me for 5 years. Don't put up with being treated like this because you may think someone "knows" your hair! Move on and give another decent hairdresser a go. Hope you get your refund soon.

Still no refund. I'm not expecting to hear from her until she's back. If I haven't had anything from her by Sunday I'll message again. And then I'll be sure to leave a factual review.

OP some hairdressers are great at building rapport and then forgetting that with rapport comes expectations that you'll take care of your client. First of all good on you for your message to her. I needed that laugh!!! Secondly I can relate. I booked an appointment for a colour for after my child was born (didn't do any colour while pregnant). I made the appointment a couple months ahead of time as usual. Well a week before giving birth I got a phone call that she was going on vacation and had to reschedule. I had to find someone else to do my hair cut because she didn't have enough time. I ended up having an emergency c section. And then 10 days after that I had sepsis and had gone to the GP who dismissed my symptoms...then went to get my hair cut and thought i was sweating bc of heat and walking so slowly because of post-partum... Well I arrived a few minutes later to the colour appointment and she said she coudn't do a full head of a hightlights because I was late. I was angry but so sick i had no energy. Less than 24 hours later I was in an ambulance in septic shock. I never went back to that colourist. From sitting in the hospital so sick, with a newborn and a horrible haircut and colour job - all done because it turned out my abusive cock-lodger husband had no intention of working and so I was starting a job as a contractor at Google a 3 weeks after my child was born. I only got my hair done to feel better walking into a new job with a post-partum body. If your hair makes you feel good. Then it's selfcare you need. That tramp failed you and she deserves a review that informs others that she will cancel appointments made well in advance for special occasions instead of maintaining professionalism and missing out herself. People deserve to know that whilst the person may be talented at their job they're unreliable and immature!!!

I’m so sorry you have been let down like this OP. Such a shocking thing to lie about and even caught out she hasn’t apologised! I would leave a very honest review, this wasn’t an average cancelled appointment, it was a special event! I would need to message again and outright ask her why she lied but I’m not good at letting things go!
Also, your husband sounds like a wonderful man and clearly adores you 🥰

If you used your credit card for the deposit you can inform your Credit Card Company that you didn't receive the Goods or Services and they will refund you. I would also be speaking to the Owner of the Salon even if she is Self-employed there as it reflects badly on the whole salon.

I think you took the right action but wouldn’t do anything once you have your refund - apart from get a new hairdresser.

Why is your self esteem so low? It seems to be derailing you including with this crush. It would be be helpful to address, perhaps with a counsellor.

You literally said 'You can send it when you're back from Friend's hen do. ' why would she do it any earlier, she's got no benefit from doing that.

I just wasn't sure if she would send it knowing I knew she was away. I'm not expecting her to but just thought it was a possibility.

I don't know why my self esteem is so low. I go through phases and have had some help in the past but just felt particularly rubbish the last few weeks. It usually sorts itself out but sometimes takes a bit longer. If I don't pick up soon I'll make an appointment.

This may be an overreaction, but I would be really angry. What a crappy thing to do. I would ask her to refund your deposit and find a new hairdresser.

I don't know why you're waiting til Sunday - it just drags things out. Surely she has online banking? Message her and say you are concerned by her lack of communication and will she please pay back the money she owes you directly. Say money to be received by midday tomorrow or you start proceedings. I find that wording is very effective!

This^

Yep 100% refund & I'd never use her again. I'd tell her why, too. Find someone who values loyal customers

Incredibly disrespectful behaviour from the hairdresser and good messages from you. If/when she returns your money you should tell her that even if she'd told you a few days before about her being double booked you'd have gotten over it, but the disrespect and lying means she has now lost you as a client.

Also can I have your DH please, he sounds great. Perhaps one day a week 😂

I dont understand why the hairdresser is being given until she is back to return the money. It takes less than 30 seconds to do a bank transfer.

It depends on your security tolerances. I know people who only use online banking on a secure desktop and absolutely won't do it on a phone. If you were abroad that could be a real hassle.

Not defending this heinous lying woman of hen-do-ness but just pointing out that it may not be unreasonable to want to wait til you are back.

Hairdresser is soooo unprofessional.

Your husband adores you. Please don’t criticise yourself. I’ve got a picture in my house that says ‘Talk to yourself like someone you love’. I’m sure you see all the beautiful things in your friends. See them in yourself.

Regarding ‘Emma’, I’d have a little word with your DH, as he probably does need to be careful around her. Mind you it sounds like we’d all get a crush on him if we met him!

Oh I would soooooo do that, if she's a good hairdresser and not too expensive I would go back to her to do my hair and ask how "her heath scare went". See her squirm uncomfortably lol. Most probably she told the husband to call her clients with some BS story and cancel her appointments, he then concocted some drama story most probably. The whole thing is a bit juvenile but this one should be the least of your problems. I would find a different hairdresser most probably, this one is stupid.

An adjustable chin strap you say 🤣🤣

I am a hairdresser and this is 100% disgusting and unacceptable. When she comes back I would just send her a message and say you were really concerned for her health when her husband messaged you, but you clear as day seen the pictures of her in Ibiza. Don’t even give her the opportunity to deny it. Tell her you wouldn’t have minded her cancelling with notice to go elsewhere but her actions effectively spoiled your day just so she could have a piss up. I would be absolutely fuming if this was me. Make sure you get your deposit back and go elsewhere. I would never ever do this to a client who is paying my wages! What a cow!