Ukrainian house guest doesn't want to leave!

[reallyneedmoresleep]

We've had a Ukrainian house guest for the last six months via the Homes for Ukraine scheme. When she came to live with us, we said it would be for a six month period and at the last welfare check we confirmed that she would need to move out by mid-May.
She doesn't want to leave. She has asked several times if she can stay, we have said no. She says our house is much nicer than where she can afford to move to.

I have visited estate agents with her who advise that to rent privately, she either needs a guarantor (we are not prepared to do this) or to pay six month's rent plus the deposit up front. She cannot afford this.

What do we do?

I know the situation in Ukraine is appallling and I am writing from a position of immense priveledge but we have found it really difficult having someone else in our home. She is not an easy person to be around, does not work, has refused all offers to be taken to support groups and frequently just hangs around us when we are in the house when we are trying to work or just to chill. Our son is home from uni in a couple of weeks and we need the room back.

There has been radio silence from the council Homes for Ukraine scheme.
How can I help her to move on?

It was almost a bit like the Captain Tom and Covid hysteria. Sunflowers and the Ukraine anthem , flags. I suppose people were swept along with it.

My friend gave her one bedroom flat out to a Ukraine couple, it was 50 miles from where she lived, then the neighbours started complaining they had forged the passport details of my friend they got the details from when my friend filled in the inline forms. My friend went overt to the flat there were 8 extra relatives all on visa's supposedly sponsored by my friend, She called the police they got them out that day, and were put into hostels under investigation

Arent night clubs running in kiev - great social scene so basically turf her out on her end date. She is a lazy freeloader and you should despise her and the stunts she is pulling
Poor pet ( not)

I couldnt give a rats about ukraine. They have got plenty of western help and the begging bowl keeps begging. Youd think here in ireland our flag was deleted in favour of a blue and yellow one. Being put up for years in hotels. Ukrainian cars still not registered here. Given money for nothing
Like everyone else i was appalled at the war there and was Yes was happy to help!! not now when they head home for holidays and take the mick
My best friend put a family up. I donated her school uniforms etc. She is working from home and hears the door bang. They left not even a thanks. Got a phone call 2 days later a land lord looking for references
No country or person can put up with freeloaders although some are genuninely "fleeing" and fair enough they need help not however Forever !!

It’s not even remotely comparable.

What a peach you are.

I suspect that in every country there are people who don't give a rats for anyone who is worse of than they are themselves, mind.

I do wonder how many Russian bots are on this thread.
For balance I hosted three Ukrainian girls for 9 months, they were all lovely people who are now living elsewhere in the UK and paying taxes to the UK government.

In what way? There was a strange collective response in the same way as there was with other events. Things moved quickly, flags, sunflowers, welcome cards from children, mobilising donations, English classes, accomodation.

It’s disingenuous to compare the two and I suspect you know it. The invasion of Ukraine has been a cruel, calculated and brutal act that continues on. It has the potential to change our lives in ways we can’t even begin to consider, and has far more permanence than COVID. I also think the Government has made a far better job of managing the Ukraine situation than it has the pandemic. All the things you talk about in your post are still going on, but as this thread illustrates, many people have either turned their heads or don’t realise this.

"Disingenuous" is very much in favour these days isn't it?

I was not comparing the invasion of Ukraine with the other events. I suggested possibly some people had become caught up in an emotional reaction without thinking things through, hence some of the issues from hosts and guests.
I do actually know first hand about this but never mind.

"Begging bowl"

What a disgusting thing to say

This was my experience too.

An absolutely lovely family of 4, two of whom are now working, paying taxes, renting independently etc etc.

You sound delightful

DesdamonasHandkerchief · 04/05/2024 23:53

I do wonder how many Russian bots are on this thread.

For balance I hosted three Ukrainian girls for 9 months, they were all lovely people who are now living elsewhere in the UK and paying taxes to the UK government.

Me too -

we had 4 Ukrainians for 12 months, they are all great people , VERY bright , thoughtful and kind . They are all Ukrainian speakers .... but my speaking ( university ) Russian to them helped avoid any cultural difference .

It is clear that FB and Mumsnet .... all internet forums ! ! .... are heavily targeted and over-run with Russian FSB lowlife / Russian bots .

Sorry how would I know a bot?

you probably would not recognise a bot or a russian fake/ troll factory post ..... In the early days of Russian fascism and internet invasion - about 7/8 years ago ....one could detect a certain style and occasional mistake that was very reflective of word order grammar , syntax in the Russian language .

Now this has been ironed out , and the poster usually appears to have perfect English.

... having spent 3 or 4 decades living in Rusland , teaching Russkiis and communicating with Russians ( who might have near native English , yet still betray a certain pattern of expression and error )

Thats interesting and disturbing.

Paying taxes? Wowzers. It will take them 1000 years to pay back what Britain gave them. Paying taxes, my arse.

40 years? How did you get into the USSR in 1984? And no, I am not a Russian bot. Asking for a friend (who is not a Russian bot either).

If anyone expresses any opinion apart from 'Hurray to Ukraine! Do come in, all of you, we have plenty of space', then they are promptly labelled as a bot. Or a troll.

Or merely a useful idiot. Those are abundant too; they spew talking points such as "it would take a thousand years of paying taxes to replay what the UK did for a refugee" and leave me thinking "how much did it cost the UK to allow someone to travel here at their own expense?" and "how on earth does the person making that remark manage to pay only a tenner a year or so in taxes?"

Maybe not a bot. But not very convincing either.

You may not be a troll, but you certainly aren’t a very nice person 🙂

Paying taxes? Wowzers. It will take them 1000 years to pay back what Britain gave them. Paying taxes, my arse.

Well as two of them are in high paying jobs and the third has just gone back to Ukraine and is working as a graphic designer (so no longer costing us anything) I'm not sure how you work that out.
Are you aware that in 2022 53.8% of UK individuals were net recipients - living in households receiving more in benefits than they paid in taxes.

As they are independent young women in privately rented accommodation, without dependents I think they are certainly net contributors.
Maybe you should check whether you're a net contributor before you start throwing around your accusations.