Embarrassed by partners go fund me...

[ick26]

Dp has decided to do an extreme "event" on the other side of the world next year. It's one of those things that rich men with too much money are known to do and usually fail having to end up getting rescued 🙄

Dp has decided that he wants to do this, he's become obsessed and this is all he goes on about (for the last three weeks anyway) before that it was smaller cheaper sports he would do once or twice buy all the kit then never mention it again. (our shed has bikes, sports rackets, golf clubs, air rifle, model cars etc you get the drift)

Only thing with this one is he has set up a go fund me (I knew nothing about it till I seen it on SM) for thousands of pounds to pay for the trip. Of course he's sitting at around 1% of the total he needs.

I honestly can't explain the physical reaction I've had to this I could put my head under my pillow and not come out again I'm so embarrassed that he's sharing this about 5 times a day to try and get people to donate!

I've tried telling him raising this amount of money would usually involve hosting events and getting sponsors from big companies but it falls on deaf ears. He's saying to people any money over what he needs will go to charity but realistically he's asking people to fund his midlife crisis and by the small number of donations everyone knows this.

To make matters worse this is an extreme event and he's fundraising before after starting training for a sport he's never actually tried before. I don't even know why I'm posting I just need to rant somewhere.

What a clueless, entitled dumbass. I don’t blame you for wanting to curl up in complete embarrassment.

Not even doing it for charity. In a cost of living crisis he expects people to fund his mid life crisis. The entitlement of some men people is staggering.

Tell him it’s a good job he’s doing a go fund me because he will be using zero family money for this pathetic enterprise.

Is he ok?! I mean…it’s a bit deranged.

Oh dear. That's mortifying.

It’s the equivalent really of asking all his friends and colleagues and family for money because he wants a new SUV because surely he should have what he wants?! Aaargh mortifying. And the extreme sport he’s never done before, as if there is something heroic in this narcissistic little plan.

Mrsjayy
No but I’m sure some people would like to contribute to such a big achievement. If they don’t want to fine.

I’d be embarrassed by this.

Oh good I'm not surprised you're embarrassed.

What will happen to the money if he can't get enough to go? Does he have to give it back or is there a caveat that it'll go to charity. Imagine how pissed you'd be if you'd donated and then found out he'd not done it.

Well if he's only 1% off his target then people clearly have no qualms with donating do they.

Like someone else suggested, get him to sell the equipment from his forgotten about hobbies so you can at least clear the garage! Then in a month when his fund is still sitting at 1/2% of target he will probably give up and realise no one wants to fund his holiday!

@DoYouSmokePaul

Why do you you feel the need to mention that?

he's not YOUR husband so how does it make the tiniest bit of difference?

Read it again...

People get cross with spelling pedants, but the difference between "of" and "off" is quite important here

Why do people expect strangers to pay for their exciting adventure holidays?

Stuff that - if had any extra cash I'd give it to charity or go on holiday myself!

Unless he's raising money for charity then YANBU and I am cringeing along with you. It's awful.

It also irritates me that loads of people enter the London Marathon on a chairty place then push you to sponsor them. What lots of people don't understand is that they aren't running it for the charity, they are running it for themselves. It's a personal ambition dressed up as an act of heroic selflessness. The charity angle is just a means to an end.

When you enter the ballot for a place in the marathon, only a small percentage of fun runners are successful in getting a standard place beause it's massively oversubscribed. The next option is to apply for a charity place, which means that you commit to raising quite a lot of money for a specific charity chosen from a list, and if you fail to raise enough money you have to stump up the rest yourself. The chances of getting a charity place are much better than the chance of getting a standard place for a standard fee., but ultimately it could end up costing you much, much more.

Those people want to run the marathon for THEMSELVES first and foremost. The push to get people to support their charity is really so they don't have to pay too much in shortfall between the target and the money raised. While I accept that charities still benefit, I do find it a bit disengenuous, the 'I am running to marathon in aid of the British Heart Foundation, or whatever.

It's the same when people want to be sponsored to do a parachute jump or something. They are always the sort of people who want to do a parachute jump anyway and would ordinarily have to pay a lot of money for the privilege.

Lol.

He is sitting at 1% of his target, not 1% off.

Cringe.

That's awful, how mortifying. I have no issue sponsoring people for doing a challenge, but not pay for their costs! Why doesn't he sell all his unused equipment to fund it...

I would never donate to that, especially when people lose their lives during extreme events! I would think if he's not bothered to financially sort it, then he's not bothered to risk assess it either.

So embarrassing and entitled, especially during a COL crisis.

Just empathising with the OP and saying that I would also find it cringe-inducing. Much like many other posters on the thread.

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Oh of not off. I don't know how I mistook that.

My (now Ex) H decided to go diving with sharks as part of his mid life crisis.

I said "that's lovely dear", and made sure the life insurance was paid up.

Yeah, it's embarrassing. There are worse mid life crises though.

As long as you don't help fundraise people won't judge you but him. He should just save for it himself.

I'm also cringing on your behalf OP (and I'm only on page one of this topic!).

What happened to sponsor money only being paid out AFTER successful completion of the event? Like in the Olden Days.

If you want to set up a gofundme for a bottle of gin and some chocs in the name of cringe recovery I'm ready to contribute OP.

This is absolute cringe of the highest order.