Who wants to bet that my DH will do fuck all for Mother's Day?

[PlaceYourBetsPlease]

He forgot Valentines Day this year and birthdays have been sporadic.

I used to tell myself I don't mind and it was okay because I was matching his energy and not doing anything for him either. But he doesn't notice or care if I give him nothing for Valentine's or his birthday.

After valentine's day recently I've come to admit that actually I think I do care. It hurts when he doesn't bother. And I told him this.

I have a suspicion Mother's Day will go unmarked. He will forget for his own mum too - but she lets him off. Which is why he's so crap with making any effort.

Anyway, I'm starting this thread wondering, based on the info above, what are the odds that I'll get nothing?

Results in one week!

And guarantee that forevermore, OP will buy all the Christmas presents, organise everyone's birthdays and all the rest with no similar care taken of her.

She's not asking for anything ridiculous here.

Well she doesn't need to do presents for her husband so that's one off the list. She can spend what she would have spent on him on herself. Win win.

I don't think it's about the present though. It's about the gesture and the demonstration of appreciation.

It's about having a different understanding of what shows appreciation?

Fascinated by all the people on a parenting forum, literally called Mumsnet, arguing so hard against men showing the merest bit of appreciation for the mothers of their children.

I think fathers running the hoover around the house once per week would be a more practical and meaningful gesture than a piece of printed cardboard once per year.

No you misunderstand no one is against a man showing his love and caring for the woman in his life mother of his children or not, doing it to orders from marketing organisations is a different issue as is expecting them to do it out of guilt because they didn't go through pregnancy and childbirth. We don't do Christmas/Valentines/birthdays/fathers or mothers day but on the other hand if I'm shopping and see something I think he'd like and I can afford it I buy it for him, yesterday I cleaned his car and then took it through the car wash as I knew it would please him, no one had to tell me to do it just like no one said to him in January that he really should buy me a new laptop, he just decided it was a nice thing to do.

I think fathers running the hoover around the house once per week would be a more practical and meaningful gesture than a piece of printed cardboard once per year.

If my DH considered housework as a replacement for a Mother's Day card then I would not be happy. Housework is a joint responsibility and isn't a 'gesture'.

I could have wrote the exact same post. He has got better after he let me down massively last year. So I'm
Hoping for better things. As he's not bothered he doesn't think anyone else is!

Its not too much to ask OP. I am fed up with these excuses like 'well you both set a precedent '..so what?!! That can change and OP has stated she would like a bit of attention on this day. OP not unreasonable...i feel it can be pure laziness in his behalf...you being taken for granted...dont start it. Others make be happy doing what they do...but you arent happy .. tell him. Do something for me on mothers day, that's what i would like. Then leave it with him. One sentence.

Housework is a joint responsibility

Tell my sister's ex that. Or indeed a whole bunch of other blokes out there.

Days like that do not bother me
My Birthday i would be upset but not others.

My ex used to buy the kids a bunch of daffodils to give to me and take us all to the beach for a celebratory ice cream (weather permitting) on Mother’s Day. And it was perfect. It doesn’t have to be expensive or extravagant. This was thoughtful, fun, and good family time.

Quality time like that 👍

Printed cardboard 👎

Housework is a joint responsibility

Tell my sister's ex that. Or indeed a whole bunch of other blokes out there.

I would. Happily.
Housework isn't a Mother's Day present.

Just because a bunch of shit men think housework is a women's responsibility doesn't mean we it's true or something we should encourage.

So true OP! I've read through all of these replies and am gobsmacked at so many of them. It's lucky that as usual it's not representative of the real world. Those saying that they don't see why Mother's Day matters are just making excuses for the fact that they have crap men in their lives. It's easier for them to pretend they don't care.

Nobody is asking for a mountain of money to be spent. From a young age my dad sat me and my sisters down to make cards for my mother and we'd then all get up early to make her breakfast in bed. I can still remember the excitement of it all.

You are right in what you're saying so please dont let some strangers on the internet try to convince you otherwise. I hope you do have a lovely Mother's Day on Sunday.

I think fathers running the hoover around the house once per week would be a more practical and meaningful gesture than a piece of printed cardboard once per year.

What a depressing statement....

I think fathers running the hoover around the house once per week would be a more practical and meaningful gesture than a piece of printed cardboard once per year

Well it doesn't need to be one or the other. They could possibly manage to do both 🙄

Those saying that they don't see why Mother's Day matters are just making excuses for the fact that they have crap men in their lives. It's easier for them to pretend they don't care.

I don't have any man in my life. Projecting much?

DM has just requested that we defer "Mothers Day" lunch until the following weekend because we both have busy schedules this weekend. It's just a day. You can take your mum to lunch whenever you like.

Thank you.

@VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia thanks for completely proving my point there 🤣

Not in the least. Unless you are accusing DCat of being a "crap man". He is male, but he's not human.

So OP, results day?!

Results day 🤣

I don’t get why people play these games and end up being hurt. If you know he’ll forget just tell him. Make it clear you want a lie in, breakfast in bed, day out etc. That’s what we do on valentines day, anniversaries, just discuss what we’re doing..we’ve now got to a place that we know Mothers/ Father’s Day = lie in and breakfast in bed, couple of little gifts from kids.