How much alcohol do you and/or your partner drink?

[Dancinggirl84]

Genuinely interested to know what is considered 'normal' in terms of alcohol consumption. How much do you drink each day? Do you drink every day? Do you think you drink a normal amount/more than others/less than others? I don't think I drink a lot; I have maybe one or two glasses of nice red wine with a meal once a week, so max of four units per week. DP will have a beer as soon as he gets in from work, large glass of wine with evening meal, another beer or two, then often a whiskey etc later in the evening. More at weekends. I'm aware I drink a lot less than most of our friends. I'm just worried that hubby is drinking far more then the recommended weekly guidelines (14 units), and also that he drinks every day. His drinking increased over covid. I've tried talking to him about it but he just brushes me off and says it's normal. One week I noted down everything that he drank and worked out the alcohol units, it was 84. I showed him and he was very angry that I had been watching what he drank but he did agree that it was too much and cut down for a while. But it just crept back up again. The last couple of years he has done dry January and he seems so much healthier and happier when he isn't drinking. It also saves us a lot of money! This year he said he wasn't doing dry January but he wouldn't drink every day of the week (part of recommended guidelines) which seemed a good idea but he hasn't managed to have an alcohol free day at all. There's always a reason why he needs a drink: bad day at work, children are being annoying etc. We've just been away for a weekend, he drank all the beer and wine we'd brought with us in the first two nights, we were staying out in the sticks and he insisted on driving forty minutes to the nearest shop to buy another bottle of wine. I'm worried that he can't go without alcohol, and may be veering into 'functional alcoholic' territory. He thinks I'm overreacting and most people drink like he does. What do you think?

I don't drink, ever. My husband might have a cool beer after a long summer walk. That's it. People never believe us!

I grew up with an alcoholic, OP. It was miserable. He gets help or he gets out.

OP your DH is drinking too much.
It is definitely negatively affecting:
His health
His relationship
His finances
So it’s too much.
Maybe £70 - £100 a week? Think what you could do with that money.
He will get a beer gut too.

DH doesn't drink at all. I drink once or twice a month.

Ps Mine was the same. He’s an ex now and very ill.

lol, I'm the opposite.

I'm a white English male and it's me that doesn't drink. I have never even touched a drop. No reason apart from not finding the desire and not wanting to become those people I've seen.

My wife will have a rare cider, maybe once a month or more if I stop by and buy a few cans as a treat.

I have a very occasional glass of wine usually for a birthday of mine. I do love a beer but I drink no alcohol beer, some are really good. I haven't found a good white wine or rose alcohol free that doesn't taste like it has been watered down. It is also shocking when you measure out the wine you pour yourself too.

Dh hasn't drank for years due to meds so he has zero alcohol beer too. We drink Peroni or Becks. My sons who are 21 and 18 also don't drink any alcohol.

Your DH is drinking far too much.

My drinking has increased recently.

I used to only have the odd half a cider say once or twice a month in summer

now I would say I have 2-3 glasses of wine a week. Sometimes I’ll have a couple of glasses every week of the month. Other times I’ll go a month or two without any alcohol.

sounds like he is drinking way above what’s healthy and probably won’t want to admit it but it seems likely he’d struggle to go without

I'm sorry NorthCliffs. I do worry what effect it is having on our children.

That's what I think. He's already morbidly obese.

2 to 3 bottles of wine a week. I will normally drink a full bottle on a Friday or Saturday and will stagger a bottle or 2 through the week.
It varies though as it depends on if I fancy it or not but it's at least 1 bottle a week. My husband is not a big drinker. He'll have maybe 3 or 4 bottles of Kopparberg cider through the week.

A glass of wine or beer a couple of times a year

A few glasses of wine on Friday night, a few G&Ts on Saturday and a beer watching the football or a film on Sunday. DP has a few more, but he is a lot bigger than me. We usually have nothing the rest of the week. Also grew up with alcoholic parent so I am careful, and I can't cope with hangovers anymore.

Seems like everyone who has commented so far is not a big drinker. A lot of our friends will have a G&T or beer after work and wine with evening meal most evenings and then more of a drinking session once a week. I think DP is trying to normalise the amount he drinks.

I rarely drink, maybe a glass of wine every couple of months. DH will have a beer with dinner once or twice a week.

Children and hangovers is the main reason why I barely drink! :)

Probably 1.5 bottles of wine and a couple of cocktails in total Thursday to Sunday. Nothing usually on a Monday to Wednesday. Is that too much?

I don’t drink at all, because I used to be a (barely) functional alcoholic. I realised recently that my dad clearly had the same issue - he’d drink gin and tonics all evening and added rum to his coffee! My partner might have a beer or two every other night.

OP, I I think the important thing here is your opinion on whether it's too much. You're his wife. The problem will be if he doesn't agree. If you think it's too much, you have skin in the game and you need to start the conversation with him about it. There will be people who respond here saying its fine but they're not married to him. You need to decide what's OK for you, where your line is.

I am two years alcohol free. Was way too much like your DH than I'd ever want to be (and only falling further into the alcohol trap - you don't ever drink less unless you stop and remain AF by choice)

DP drinks very infrequently. Think he had two beers at a family dinner on NYE and before that I cannot even remember.

I would say that’s certainly above ‘normal’ amounts of alcohol to drink and the fact he got angry when you tried to speak to him about it would be a red flag.
Personally I drink maybe a bottle of wine every week/ten days. I’ll go several nights without an alcoholic drink then open a bottle which will last 2-3 nights, and then repeat. My husband doesn’t drink at home but has 3-4 pints one night a week when he goes to darts. That’s a normal week, but if we have, say, a wedding to attend we’d drink rather more! Or if we went to watch the rugby at the pub or went out for dinner etc, we’d have a few then.

When DH is home we'll split a couple of bottles of wine over Friday and Saturday evenings and maybe a cocktail or G&T. We don't drink on a school night usually. DH is away a fair bit so only home less than 6 months a year.

We can go weeks without drinking then its a glass or 2

I used to drink a couple of glasses of wine a week, but now I don’t drink at all. My dad was an alcoholic and I’m increasingly wary of alcohol and don’t really like the kids seeing it normalised at home.