The parents of the 2 teenagers who murdered Brianna Ghey

[Netball01]

I’ve been following the horrific murder of Brianna Ghey, and it goes without saying that her poor parents / family must be going through absolute hell.

But after the names of the 2 murderers being released today, it’s made me think how on earth do their parents ever come to terms with what their children haven done ?! As far as I’ve read so far, they are just normal people. I just don’t know how you could ever try and move on from this.

There's some serious passing the buck/damage limitation going on. Yes the school where she met Brianna should've been told, however to my mind they were obliged to ask in the absence of a reason. Both schools are at fault here.

Yes to the first, no idea to the second. And very easy to find.

We know they raised murderers.

I've no idea!

I’m not surprised that the school wasn’t given all the information about Scarlett prior to her managed move. In this situation, she would be dual registered between the two schools for a set period before moving on to the roll of the new school. Potentially, the old school were not being completely open in order to move the problem on. I have come across this kind of thing from both schools and our (different) LA in similar situations (although not as serious as this).

At my primary school, I spend a huge amount of time talking to parents and sorting out issues where parents do not monitor their child’s online use or limit what they have access to. The majority of parents just do not take it seriously. I can easily see how the online behaviours could have been missed.

I was surprised to see an interview with the head of the school where she said she would have no idea how pupils access the dark web. As head, I would assume she is trained as a designated safeguarding lead and would have more of an idea about what to look out for.

We know they raised murderers.

Are Scarlett’s older brothers murderers?

😱

I've never hit report on my own posts so many times in one day before.

Hi all. Thanks to those who got in touch. Can we make a polite request that you avoid linking this case to a current case, following the instructions of a Court Order? We don't like removing discussions so would be very grateful if you could work with us on this one. Thanks, all.

Contempt of court and online posts.

Do we have these discussions after every knifing and shooting in the UK? Many of the people involved in gang crime and glamourising gangs are the same age as the defendants and victim here.
Do we blame the parents or outside influences?

It would break my heart to be involved in this, to lose my child or for my child to be responsible for the death of another.

Perhaps they did ask but weren’t given the full story?

Also, for that previous ‘poisoning’ incident, I wonder what follow-up there was? Moving schools seems like pushing the problem on.

There was an incident in our town where 2 lads got into a fracas at school (they were about 12 years old.) One pushed the other over and he didn't get up. Other kid was arrested and looked as if her would tried for murder or manslaughter. Within minutes wild rumours were circulating on social media. Everyone was baying for him to be punished, including the parents of the dead child. Until the autopsy revealed dead child to have an undetected heart defect and that he could have collapsed and died at anytime. All charges were dropped and but it was too late for the other child though his and his family's lives were ruined and they ended up moving away. I had a connection with the lad and even had it not been an accident he and his family did not deserve the treatment they got.

Apparently, there is no single cause of psychopathy - genetics, trauma, brain structure, exposure to violence during childhood, and environmental conditions can all contribute, obviously, but remember this - we all have free will, we all take the decisions we do ourselves. The only guilty parties are those 2 murderers. Their family may have played a part, but they couldn't predict this outcome. Their lives are ruined too, though they could be hard faced and uncaring about what their child has done. Who knows.

The female murderer though sounds like she could have been caught earlier - not sure she could have been corrected but I'd like to think that was a possibility.

My utmost sympathy and support though goes to Brianna's family and friends.

It seems unlikely to me that the new school weren't aware at all about the reasons she was facing expulsion but most likely the focus was on the drugs and the full implications of giving something to another child weren't fully explored. Not that I am condoning it, but I imagine that lots of pupils are sanctioned in British schools every year for bringing cannabis gummies and worse into schools and quite a lot of them will share/sell to others. There are drugs in every kind of secondary school from failing comprehensives to the most expensive independents and, terrible though that is, most of those kids are not going to commit horrific violent crimes. Hindsight is a wonderful thing and of course now it is obvious that there may well have been a real intent to harm the pupil who was given the drugs I can understand how that might not have been so clear at the time. I don't know anything about the schools involved but if there's a significant drug issue in the area I could well believe this didn't stand out as an unusual or particularly high risk matter to the schools or the police at the time. I'm sure they regret it now. Lots of people must be thinking back on things they should have picked up on but didn't but things always seem obvious when you know what the end result is don't they?

Keep your kids off the internet for as long as possible. No smart phones, no weed, and don’t let them hide themselves away in their bedrooms for hours at a time.

@Dibbydoos do we ALL really have free will? It would appear so in this case, but I've witnessed far too many psychotic episodes to think that everyone has free will all the time.

It’s easy to blame the parents but we need to look at ourselves collectively as a society. Our children are probably the most unhappy and mentally disturbed in generations, especially in the UK and other English speaking countries. We should be asking ourselves what went wrong and how we can on an individual as well as societal basis remedy lifestyle and social factors that are leading to these trends. At the heart of the issue is technology use, permissive attitudes towards drug use and a loneliness epidemic that’s affecting all age groups including the very youngest. On an individual basis I think a return to far more old-fashioned style parenting and childhood will go along way.

Eddie’s side definitely looks like a case of inappropriate parenting from the father from what we know but aren’t allowed to link. In addition to that, he bought the knife of course.

The maternal grandmother was into an alternative therapy for autism & was implementing it even though a) Eddie hadn’t actually been diagnosed and b) the National Autistic Society do not approve of the strategy.

The mother has seemingly not objected to what the Grandmother was advocating & doing whilst not chasing down any official diagnosis.

As for the Jenkinsons, their daughter spiked a 13 year old with a cannabis gummy at school. If your radar isn’t well & truly up after that then you are culpable, at least in part. But no, not only that but crumpled murder plans on sheets of paper were left to fester in the daughters room apparently. Suffice to say, it seems they could have been more hands on. You then look at Scarlett’s social media post & what she was left to watch as a 12 year old during lockdown.

Indeed. I’m bit sure if it’s more common or we are just talking about it more now but I know three young adults who have taken their own lives in the last 4 months. They weren’t known to each other, nothing to link them (so bit at same school, parents didn’t know each other etc).

Sounds like bullying and despair. They are being told that the world is f*cked, social media is toxic etc.

The blame for societal issues also lies with leadership rather than solely with parents. A concern I have is as the country experiences more economic challenges we may see an increase in such occurrences.

I agree with this. The current parenting style seems to be neglect dressed up as concern - no boundaries or rules ‘because I don’t want to parent like a dictator’ alongside unrestricted use of technology, a childhood spent mainly in bedrooms on devices with little contact with the outside world ‘because roaming the streets in is dangerous’, and an obsession with mitigating every discomfort they may experience to the extent that they don’t emotionally develop properly. It’s bizarre and creating a generation of aggressive, weak, depressed children.

Agree. People think I’m anal because I haven’t yet 10 month old DS have any screen time yet and my 4 year old doesn’t own a tablet (and I have zero plans to get her one), I don’t let her go on my phone either. My loose plan is to keep them both busy with hobbies and outdoor activities so they have little time to get up to no good. I know this strategy won’t last forever but if I can get them to 16 with intact normal brains I will be happy.

This is really hard because I can honestly say I have no idea what I'd do if DC did something like this. I can't ever imagine cutting them off but where does the line get drawn? They're my baby but they've murdered someone else baby. I do understand why mothers keep visiting their children in jail.

Good luck when they start school and you are not their prime influence or constant caregiver

WOW. Just wow.