Who would you garotte with their own intestines?

[drspouse]

In case you are hard of humour, this is LIGHT HEARTED.
An MP has suggested this punishment for fly tipping.
Who's on your list?
I've got:
Anyone who suggests white polos for school uniform, for crimes against stain remover.
Nigel Farage, for being Nigel Farage.
Social workers from the early help team who say "what do you think you need as a family" and then say "oh we don't offer that, all we offer is parenting courses", for raising parents' hope.
Who's next?

Drivers who don't indicate at roundabouts

Anyone involved in defunding the NHS

Climate change deniers.

The people who double park at my office carpark and block people in. Death to them all.

Anyone who doesn't indicate

People who park over the bays for zero reason in their tiny cars

People who dump things in supermarkets in the wrong place when they change their mind or don't put the trolleys back in the bay

People who walk in crowded places only to dilly dally / change direction randomly / stop and stare at their phone 📱

Middle aged men who think that their 30 year career makes them SMEs regardless of any new development / technology / regulations introduced since 1990

I've probably got a much longer list but I swear my blood pressure has already gone up 😂

The twat who mucked up my remortgage
Defo my ex husband
Tories

Journalists who write how 'families' are going to be impacted by rising costs; because, as we all know, single people get everything free.

People who chuck rubbish. An especially slow garroting for the people who chuck rubbish three feet away from a bin. Or, like the woman I saw yesterday, just kick it out of the way rather than binning it.

People who put their feet on seats on public transport.

People (hello, upstairs neighbour!) who persistently put recycling in the wrong bin AND overfill it.

People who march down the train carriage opening every window.

The woman on SW Trains and her chirpy 'See it, say it, sorted' announcement. Do companies deliberately recruit announcers with the most irritating voices?

Probably got a lot more if I think about it.

Ooo one more - people who buy pets and then don't treat them like the absolute angels they are! I'm looking at you, purebred owners with no insurance 👀

People on 100k who complain they're broke.

Came onto this thread specifically to say Nigel Farage and you beat me to it in the OP.

Dog owners who stop next to my garden and wait while their little friend wees through my fence, killing my flowers!

... and try to pretend that someone on UC is better off.

Bullies.
And people who lie to protect the bullies because it makes an easy life.

People who park in on- street parking bays a half-car-length from the end.

Boris Johnson, David Cameron and Tony Blair. All fucked up the country one way or another.

And anyone to do with Horizon / Post Office.

My cat, who was poised to vomit on the wooden floorboards (not great, but OK.. ), and then half a second before actually vomiting, moved to the carpet.

I’m up for the fly tippers though. I fucking hate them.

People who play music/have conversations on speaker whilst on public transport.

Baggsy Boris Johnson here.

People (hello, upstairs neighbour!) who persistently put recycling in the wrong bin AND overfill it.
Oh yes, the whole row of house sharers/bedsit dwellers in the street over our alley who are perpetually perplexed as to why, when they overfill their wheelie bin, it doesn't get collected.
And then wonder why we all have rats.

Sturgeon and Leitch, may they garrotte each other nicely!

I think you'll find there's a queue.
But that's OK, I'll take Nigel and someone else can have Boris.

Anyone who can't understand or respect other people may have different political views to them.

In our flats it just means that a neighbour and I are constantly having to shift stuff to the right bin and dismantle and fold up cartons (they can't do that either) from their never ending Amazon deliveries.

On the plus side, they are unbelievably quiet.

People who send poorly children who should be in bed into school

Pyjamas and dressing gowns on the school run/supermarket shopping

Oh so many but right now DH is top of the list.