Who would you garotte with their own intestines?

[drspouse]

In case you are hard of humour, this is LIGHT HEARTED.
An MP has suggested this punishment for fly tipping.
Who's on your list?
I've got:
Anyone who suggests white polos for school uniform, for crimes against stain remover.
Nigel Farage, for being Nigel Farage.
Social workers from the early help team who say "what do you think you need as a family" and then say "oh we don't offer that, all we offer is parenting courses", for raising parents' hope.
Who's next?

Maybe you could outsource?

Or swap?

The consultant tasked with implementing a restructure at my former workplace .

The DWP bosses planning legal changes so the DWP can arrest you and search your house without involving the police.

Because having a de facto private "police force" worked so very well for the Post Office.

Also, any politician who supports this legislation.

https://www.benefitsandwork.co.uk/news/would-you-feel-safe-with-a-dwp-‘police-force’?utm_source=iContact&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Benefits%20and%20Work&utm_content=V2%20January%202024%20newsletter

and

https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/media/6285e76dd3bf7f1f41a08e1a/fighting-fraud-in-the-welfare-system.pdf

My list is:
People who mumble or talk quickly on the phone;
Homeopaths (and all other quackery pushers);
Jehovah's Witnesses who knock on my door;
Drama Queens (or Kings);
People who say 'yourself' in the wrong context;
People who've had cosmetic work done but claim they're 100% natural;
Slim people who say they eat everything and never exercise (but secretly do);
People who make punctuated lists (arseholes).

People who order drinks with their backs to the counter.

Tories.

Vladimir Putin
And all the cronies who surround him.

Brexit voters have already garotted themselves 😁

My sister in law - and I would take great pleasure from it.

People who eat in the theatre.
People who eat in the cinema.
People making a noise in the Quiet Coach.
People who play media, their phones etc out loud in any public space (or let their kids do it).
People who still test for Covid, and make a fuss about it generally.

No named individual, tho. Actually, I feel quite sorry for politicians of all parties because it's an awful, underpaid job.

People who don’t get their cats & dogs neutered & who then allow them to breed.

People who abandon their pets. I don’t mean responsible rehoming, I mean dumping them.

Spam callers.

Effing litter louts and fly tippers all over Scotland's highways and byways and in towns! You are all an effing disgrace to the towns, communities and country you call Scotland!

Donald Trump

Animal abusers. Illegal hunters. Idiots who chuck rat poison freely around and kill everything regardless.

Romanian dog breeders who flog them to Brits as 'rescued' and import God knows what

Misophonia - join the club

Posters who instantly come onto a supposed to be funny thread to strut their politicalopinions.

soooooo boring and unoriginal.

This

omg the DWP can 100% not be trusted

People who point out grammatical errors, whilst, missing the point of the post/thread.

People who do not say Thankyou when you hold a door open, or similar.

And this one makes me very, very, very angry - People who do not say excuse me. They just stand behind you in a shopping aisle and expect you to move out of the way and know where the fuck they are going.

The former SENCO at the school I work in - it's only since someone new took over the position at the start of this term that I've realised how truly awful she was at her job and how toxic her treatment of our support staff team really was. It's like a different school now!

@LadyMonicaBaddingham That’s a good one!! I’d add our primary school SENCO to the list as well.

Nothing more than a gatekeeper of services. Fill in the form you’ve been filling in for my child for 5 years and let the council decide please and thank you.

People who don't pick up their dog shit

Delivery men who can open gates but don't close them

All the bosses that interrupt and talk over staff beneath them then complain no one tells them anything

Person at Eon who keeps texting me about smart meters

SNP politicians and their policy advisors

Owen Jones

Drivers that flash their lights as Morse code for whatever they think another driver should be doing.

Drivers that wear gigantic coats and can't move their arms to steer. Hence the Morse coding.