Holiday apartment with in laws; no internal doors!

[Sooty20235]

I have no actual reason for this post apart from sharing my horror and hoping for some funny stories of surviving nightmare holidays from others.

Agreed to go on holiday with in laws and was admittedly very hands off and relaxed about the actual booking, leaving it to my partner who left it to his parents. (Obviously never ever going to do this again!) Cost wasn’t an issue for us but partner and family can be frugal. They are all very close.

Arrived a few days ago and the tiny apartment has no internal doors so there is no escaping each other or privacy. The bedrooms each open on to the living and kitchen area with just curtains, and you have to go through one bedroom to leave the apartment.

Im halfway through and really struggling. Tried to nap earlier but there was no effort to keep voices down. I’m so so tempted to book the gorgeous 4* hotel next door but I know it will upset people.

Never ever never doing this again and who on earth designs an apartment with no bloody internal doors!?

Is this in the UK? Very bizarre. I went to a similar one in France but, Even worse, there was a curtain on the loo door!

i would book next door so quick!! What the fuck! This is actually mad, there is no way this is reasonable. I’m sympathetic to your in laws it’s possible they didn’t know? It might help with keeping the place cool etc and fine if you were a couple with children - but grown adults not shagging each other? You need a fucking door

Book the hotel. Just do it. There is no need for this. If they choose to get upset that you elect not to be within sight and/or earshot of them 24/7, that says everything about them and nothing about you.

Suffering needlessly is not evidence of your love of or affection towards your partner and in laws. The two things aren’t related.

Oh I stayed in a hotel in Paris with a curtain instead of a loo door, and now I remember, I visited a bar in Houston with a similar arrangement. Oh yes, I am a classy lady.
You have my sympathy, OP, that sounds like my absolute nightmare

Yep you guessed it, it’s France! That is horrendous, we do eat least have a door on the toilet although that is still very close for comfort to everything else. We have another booked for March and I’m going to go through the plans and accommodation with a fine toothed comb.

I absolutely love this. Oh god I’m so tempted. There’s two possibilities nearby, both around 300 euros for the remaining nights, which in the grand scheme of life and holidays would be so worth it.

In laws are lovely and really seem to think all this is ok and very fun but wow I’m struggling.

I don’t think they knew…I hope they didn’t! They are much more relaxed about it all than I am but then they are all family, I am not 😵‍💫

I'm surprised a holiday let is allowed to do that without flouting a fire safety rule as much as anything

I mean you can’t even have a shag?

Id be into that hotel next door faster than you could believe. Just say you aren’t sleeping well and want to give them some privacy. Nutters!!

They are killing some short term holiday lets here - some historic etc. with new safety regs that say all rooms must fire rated doors and lots of other (good!) things.

France, nope not even doors. Zut alors!

This made me laugh as my DH nearly killed me when we booked a holiday with 10 members of my extended family - a bungalow which had 5 proper bedrooms with doors, and then our bed which was in the open plan kitchen-sitting room separated by a curtain. I didn't mind too much, but he would be wide awake as soon as anyone got up.

I would definitely book the hotel.
Say you are an introvert and need some down time.

this is crazy. book the hotel and you can salvage a few decent days from this holiday

Have tried to talk to partner about it but now he’s really upset with me. Don’t know what to do.

Is your partner a human man?

I can’t express enough how reasonable it is not to live in one room with your in laws! What’s his problem?

Have a loud row in your ‘Private space’ to prove how little privacy you have!

@CatPancake your message made me laugh for all sorts of reasons at the end of a really shit day - thank you!

Oh fuck no.

I wouldn’t pay thousands of pounds to cosplay living in a Victorian tenement while simultaneously ruining my relationship with the in-laws.

Book the place next door and let them fill their boots with listening to each others’ ablutions while eating their morning pain au chocolats.

He says he wouldn’t complain if it was my family but I’m pretty sure he would. Wouldn’t know anyway, I’ve never asked him to stay with them for a week with no doors. Even when we visit my grandparents in a large house we never stay more than 2 nights without then going to a hotel or camping. Plus my family are very respectful of people’s need to be alone. He’s now not talking to me and I don’t really want to stay in a hotel with him anyway at this point.

Ha! Had exactly this situation with an apartment we rented with friends in Eastern Europe. No internal doors at all (and no curtains!). My partner and I 'on a walk' found an alternative room nearby, which was so much nicer and considerably less than what we were paying for our share of the apartment from hell. No one was offended we moved out though - they were happy to have the extra space and less demand on the bathroom 😂.

I feel like crying but this really cheered me up 😂 Partner thinks it would be rude of me to book something else and that ‘they changed the whole menu for me’ … no one ever actually asked what I like to eat…. Being a vegetarian meant they fed me octopus on the first night.
Is now not talking to me and says he doesn’t understand what I want. Fuck this.

He sounds like a right arse.

All the better that he's not talking to you OP, off you pop to the lovely hotel and enjoy a couple of days of peace and solitude. Leave your boundary-less in laws to it.

With that attitude from your DH I would book myself to the hotel.

He’s really not to be fair, and I know he has tried really hard. He now feels stuck between upsetting his family or me but just doesn’t understand how basically a one room holiday is so hard. He grew up with a huge family all sharing tents and bedrooms etc.

I'd he in that hotel so fast! It's not reasonable to expect tourists to to stay in an apartment with no doors and no privacy. Frankly he's fortunate that you are willing to holiday with extended family in the first place - a lot of people would struggle with a whole week of in laws, even when they get on very well.

There's no need for it to cause offence - just say you cannot sleep and since there are no doors it would be nicer for everyone to have a bit of space.