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Original poster

I have fucked up badly

392 replies

Shamefullhouse · 20/01/2024 11:44

Omg I have Been find 400 for for tipping 250 if I pay within 10 days .

This would have been during in my time of struggling badly with my house and the state it was in my bins getting over full and really struggling with everything really badly.

I know I should not have done it but I was struggling. As far as I know they are talking about a couple of bits I took to the communal bins . ( they don't belong to me house) but to the flats behinde me. I couldn't get the bits in the bin. So I left them next to the bin. They would have been bits of wood from a unit i think .

OP posts:
Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 10:18

Maybe I can email environmental heath in general. And request if I have the wrong place can they pass it on and ask for them to respond so that I know

OP posts:
Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 10:24

JaneAustensHeroine · 21/01/2024 10:07

I understand your embarrassment OP. I think if you speak with the council and tell them what you have said here they will hopefully signpost you to people who can help you get on top of this. Once you are on top of this and your garden and home are clear, you will feel so much better. Hopefully there will be community volunteers locally who can support you with all this, without judgement. It’s more common than you think.

💐 for you OP and to all those on here who are genuinely offering to support you.

I'm going to contact then explain things best i can and see if there are any suggestions. The worst they can do is say no .

OP posts:
MaggieNextDoor · 21/01/2024 10:33

You need to admit to the fly tipping, you can't get away from that, but ask for more bins or assistance to shift rubbish from your house to the recycling centre. Can you ask a friend with a big car to help out in these circumstances? A couple of car loads of rubbish to the tip will help enormously.

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 10:37

MaggieNextDoor · 21/01/2024 10:33

You need to admit to the fly tipping, you can't get away from that, but ask for more bins or assistance to shift rubbish from your house to the recycling centre. Can you ask a friend with a big car to help out in these circumstances? A couple of car loads of rubbish to the tip will help enormously.

😞

OP posts:
pickledandpuzzled · 21/01/2024 10:42

So, you can’t do anything about this today. No point sitting stressing. What can you do instead? What are the DC up to, have you got any plans for the day?

We seem to be missing the most dramatic weather up here in East Mids. Only light rain later, and a bit breezy.

Andherewegoagain24 · 21/01/2024 11:05

Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 09:44

I just had a quick check of things to double check. I thought it was 60.00 for 3 items
But im wrong its 60 for a fridge removal its 40.00 for 4 items such as a bed,wardrobe, chair.

I'm really confused because I don't have items like that. Mine is just stuff .or even just general rubbish that I'm going in circles with

Show quote history

And it's pretty easy to ring/email to check how this works.

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 11:26

I have managed to email them now. I don't know how I was messing it up. Anyway I asked if I can do a payment plan . I explained that I was struggling. And asked if there was anything that they could suggest.

OP posts:
BlueGrey1 · 21/01/2024 11:43

I'm going to contact then explain things best i can and see if there are any suggestions. The worst they can do is say no

Yes, this would be the correct way to go

BluebellsAndLillies · 21/01/2024 12:00

@Shamefullhouse good morning, firstly don’t be so hard on yourself everyone makes mistakes we are all human! You have done so well with getting your home decorated and sorted out don’t let this one set back ruin what you have achieved for your children.

In my area the council will collect bulky items for free if any member of the household is in receipt of DLA/PIP. If not it’s £30 for every 3 items they remove and they do a 20% discount on certain days of the month. It might be worth looking into, it’s not well advised in my area you find out on the last section/page on the online booking system where you put in payment details, it’s one free collection each year April-April.

BluebellsAndLillies · 21/01/2024 12:03

@Shamefullhouse they also take bagged general waste under bulky collections as long as it’s not food waste/nappies etc things like broken toys, old clothes etc they will take.

Can you put extra recycling out? We can in black bin bags next to our recycling units they take as much as you put out, not general waste only recycling.

Name081 · 21/01/2024 12:04

Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 09:09

Yeah as I said I hold my hands up to what I done. Its the bits that I have not done. And the bit in my own garden that i don't understand.

I'm going to try and contact them tomorrow some how. I get I have to pay the fine. But if there's a massive issue with stuff in my garden whilst I save for a skip or simlar it's going to put me in a really hard situation because I can't afford to do both in a short period of time.

Show quote history

Why can’t you just store it in your back garden? Problem solved.

Also you still seem to be hung up on the fact the council tipped your box contents onto the floor, I imagine to look for evidence. It’s irrelevant whether they were in a pile on the floor or neatly placed inside another box, it makes absolutely no difference - the fact is that you dumped it there and that is what you are rightly being fined for.

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 12:07

Name081 · 21/01/2024 12:04

Why can’t you just store it in your back garden? Problem solved.

Also you still seem to be hung up on the fact the council tipped your box contents onto the floor, I imagine to look for evidence. It’s irrelevant whether they were in a pile on the floor or neatly placed inside another box, it makes absolutely no difference - the fact is that you dumped it there and that is what you are rightly being fined for.

Show quote history

Your way behinde

OP posts:
JenniferJupiterVenusandMars · 21/01/2024 12:46

janicegarvey · 20/01/2024 12:52

Oh my god I've done this times 😳😳

We're a family of 5 and our bin is tiny and they only collect fortnightly . We honestly recycle as much as humanly possible but still end up with them both full before collection - Our council is absolutely shit

So we've got two communal bins on a green near our house and I wait til it's dark and get rid of a couple of small bin bags

On a side note - how sad and pathetic would someone need to be to take pics and grass you up. Some people have absolutely no lives

So you’d happily live with stuff dumped illegally?
I definitely wouldn’t!

MaggieNextDoor · 21/01/2024 13:32

Fly tippers deserve to be fined, and anyone saying they didn't know it was fly tipping are pretending to be dim.

RunningFromInsanity · 21/01/2024 16:06

As I said before I work in EH and sometimes deal with flytipping. At our Council we would accept a payment plan if you explained you couldn’t pay in one go. It maybe worth clearly pointing out which items were not yours too.

I am a bit confused that you say you put the items there the night before bin collection, it’s very unlikely a Council officer could come out to a reported flytip that quickly. My assumption would be an annoyed resident noticed all the items and removed them so the bin men wouldn’t collect them. Or the bin men removed them and reported.

Either way, call them if possibly, we are human beings at the end of the phone.

If you are struggling with a large amount of waste in your garden you should also speak to the Council or maybe your housing officer. Sometimes we organise community skip days, where we pay for a skip that residents can fill. This cuts down on fly tipping in the long run so is worth it for the Council.

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 16:18

RunningFromInsanity · 21/01/2024 16:06

As I said before I work in EH and sometimes deal with flytipping. At our Council we would accept a payment plan if you explained you couldn’t pay in one go. It maybe worth clearly pointing out which items were not yours too.

I am a bit confused that you say you put the items there the night before bin collection, it’s very unlikely a Council officer could come out to a reported flytip that quickly. My assumption would be an annoyed resident noticed all the items and removed them so the bin men wouldn’t collect them. Or the bin men removed them and reported.

Either way, call them if possibly, we are human beings at the end of the phone.

If you are struggling with a large amount of waste in your garden you should also speak to the Council or maybe your housing officer. Sometimes we organise community skip days, where we pay for a skip that residents can fill. This cuts down on fly tipping in the long run so is worth it for the Council.

I manged to email this morning. I have basically said what you said above. I have asked if there's anything that might help me to get things sorted out . I made it clear I'm paying the fine . I did mention the things that are not mine. I said about the kids special needs incase there's any help via that way.

With the encorement thing there was stuff there before my stuff was there so maybe things were reported before I actually put my stuff there . Not sure . Either way it's gonna get sorted now

OP posts:
ilovemyspace · 21/01/2024 16:43

Glad you've managed to email them now - I bet you feel better just for doing that !
You've got balls of steel staying on this thread 😂😂but I'm glad you did because many other posters have now been supportive and offered good advice.

You've set things in motion, and things can only get a bit better for you now.

Fingers crossed! and have a good (and well deserved) Sunday!

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 17:05

ilovemyspace · 21/01/2024 16:43

Glad you've managed to email them now - I bet you feel better just for doing that !
You've got balls of steel staying on this thread 😂😂but I'm glad you did because many other posters have now been supportive and offered good advice.

You've set things in motion, and things can only get a bit better for you now.

Fingers crossed! and have a good (and well deserved) Sunday!

You have been lovely . You have stayed with me even when I have not Been logic. You have been really kind and stayed positive towards me. Thank you 💐

And yes I do feel better that I managed to email I'm the end. Because I feel like I can sort something now . Hopefully

OP posts:
ScreamingBeans · 21/01/2024 17:56

s

ScreamingBeans · 21/01/2024 18:02

*People who can’t afford to pay much are charged a lot less. My council charge £15 for 5 x bully waste items. My elderly disabled mum isn’t charged at all.

So yes, those who can afford to pay should pay. Otherwise council tax charges will go up to employ more people to collect people’s waste.*

Everyone knows that only people on certain benefits get discounts on services or free school dinners etc. Then people can pretend that all poor people who aren't on benefits can "afford to pay".

Councils can fund the extra expense of not charging for bulk waste, by fining dodgy business who fly-tip much higher amounts.

Tattletwat · 21/01/2024 18:48

RunningFromInsanity · 21/01/2024 16:06

As I said before I work in EH and sometimes deal with flytipping. At our Council we would accept a payment plan if you explained you couldn’t pay in one go. It maybe worth clearly pointing out which items were not yours too.

I am a bit confused that you say you put the items there the night before bin collection, it’s very unlikely a Council officer could come out to a reported flytip that quickly. My assumption would be an annoyed resident noticed all the items and removed them so the bin men wouldn’t collect them. Or the bin men removed them and reported.

Either way, call them if possibly, we are human beings at the end of the phone.

If you are struggling with a large amount of waste in your garden you should also speak to the Council or maybe your housing officer. Sometimes we organise community skip days, where we pay for a skip that residents can fill. This cuts down on fly tipping in the long run so is worth it for the Council.

Part of the problem is OP didn't just put stuff into the bin she also dumped stuff at side of bin because she couldn't fit it it. But she chose to dump it at side of someone else's bin instead of taking it home.

As said I'm sorry for what the op is going through personally but that ain't anyone else problem.

Shiningout · 21/01/2024 19:24

Josette77 · 20/01/2024 17:56

Op I'm going to share something that I truly hope will be taken in the spirit in which it's given.

You remind me a lot of my mom. She's had a lot of struggles with mental health as well as addiction issues.

When she does something wrong it's very hard to discuss this with her. Either she has a million excuses to remind us of why her life is awful, or she will apologize and then say how awful she is and she should not be here.

Rather than be able to take responsibility, acknowledge her mistake, and correct it, she uses her guilt in a way that makes us not able to hold her accountable.

I don't like confronting her because then I am dealing with her self destruction. It doesn't feel fair, because we all make mistakes and should be allowed to acknowledge and correct them without the emotional rollercoaster.

You have been through a lot, but at the end of the day this is just a mistake.

You did something wrong. You are being help accountable. Take responsibility and move on.

This doesn't mean you are a selfish or bad person it means you did a selfish thing like we all do. In the future though it's ok to be wrong and just acknowledge it. I think gently I suspect unintentionally you perhaps have gotten used to feeling like the victim in all aspects.

You got caught doing something shitty, fix it, and feel proud you took responsibility rather than fall back onto guilt and self pity. You can do this. 💞

Yes I think this is really good post and I agree that you don't need to spiral into self hatrid or self pity every time you make a mistake op. Everyone has done things they aren't proud of, hell no one would know this about me but I have a criminal record from years ago! And I've made lots of other mistake in the years since although not illegal :D but the point is try to reframe this in your mind of you can't change the past but what you can change is how you respond and change things in the future.

ilovemyspace · 21/01/2024 20:01

@Shamefullhouse You have stayed with me even when I have not Been logic.
Do you know, it's because of the way you post - you're so honest and speak straight from the heart and you're always so down to earth, it's really not hard to understand where you're coming from! You just say it like it is! - and a lot of people here could learn from you ........
You've had a bit of a roller coaster ride on this particular thread, but you've come out of it with your head held high!! 😊
I hope you always find support here when you need it - I'm always really happy to see when you're making a bit of progress against all the odds - and there are plenty of others too! (just don't change your user name too much 😆so you're still vaguely recognisable ) x

ilovemyspace · 21/01/2024 20:12

@Josette77 You remind me a lot of my mom. She's had a lot of struggles with mental health as well as addiction issues.

When she does something wrong it's very hard to discuss this with her. Either she has a million excuses to remind us of why her life is awful, or she will apologize and then say how awful she is and she should not be here.

Rather than be able to take responsibility, acknowledge her mistake, and correct it, she uses her guilt in a way that makes us not able to hold her accountable.

To be absolutey fair to @Shamefullhouse OP has never had a million excuses to remind us of why her life is awful.
She has always been totally honest and upfront about the problems she's asking support for and has never tried to avoid responsibility. She has never made excuses and, in fact, has always taken on (in my opinion) far too much of the blame for things that she isn't responsible for.

A lot of this thread has been a prime example of people just making assumptions, not reading the OP properly, not actually listening to OP and not wanting to help, but just wanting to jump in with uninformed judgements about someone's life ...............

Original poster
Shamefullhouse · 21/01/2024 20:31

ilovemyspace · 21/01/2024 20:01

@Shamefullhouse You have stayed with me even when I have not Been logic.
Do you know, it's because of the way you post - you're so honest and speak straight from the heart and you're always so down to earth, it's really not hard to understand where you're coming from! You just say it like it is! - and a lot of people here could learn from you ........
You've had a bit of a roller coaster ride on this particular thread, but you've come out of it with your head held high!! 😊
I hope you always find support here when you need it - I'm always really happy to see when you're making a bit of progress against all the odds - and there are plenty of others too! (just don't change your user name too much 😆so you're still vaguely recognisable ) x

Thank you. Yes I'm 100% honest. Maybe to much sometimes. But if I was not I would be lying to myself. Also my threads would not be a true account that would mean any replys do not fit well. Plus I would not be able to keep up with what I have said.

I reality I probably should not have made the thread . I still.over panic about stuff I should not. Had I got that letter on Monday. I probably would not have got myself into such a mess. As soon as Managed to sort that email I started feel more logic. It wasn't back to normal but through out the day its got better.

I might leave my user name for a bit as I have kind of got over it now

OP posts:
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