Son eating us out of house and home

[Mumof118]

DS 19 eats everything and anything. He doesn’t leave anything for anyone else and doesn’t replace. He also infuriatingly doesn’t even let you know it’s gone or add it to the Alexa shopping list.

Example: Friday evening I buy 6 pints of milk. I just go to decant a bit to take to work and it’s all gone. Every last drop. I was even at the Supermarket at 3pm and could have bought more if he added it to the Alexa list

Another example, I go to get a cake from a pack of four for dessert. All gone.

A pack of eight wraps. All used up along with the cheese.

Am I being unreasonable getting upset with him. He thinks I am.

He needs to pay for his food!

Has he ever done a weekly food shop for the family?
If not then perhaps that's something he should take a turn at. He might learn something.

£70 per month is insanely cheap. He needs to get a job and pay his way!

Better still, never take the last of anything like bread or milk without checking with others, first.

He needs to start pulling his weight. He'll be much more likely to get a job and have less time to eat mindlessly if he has to actually do his share!

My 17 year old Foster son is always eating. Yet he is not overweight because he does a lot of sport. I ensure he has 3 good meals and 2 snacks each day but he then has additional snacks like a whole punnet of grapes and he'll often make himself a 3 egg omelette about an hour after a meal. I do give him a good portion of carbs, vegetables and lots of protein. He does tell me when he's eaten something though. I'd focus on your DS doing that first.

Nah, mine works long hours and still eats like a horse. He's hungry 🤷🏻‍♀️

Agree. He's got it made right now.

Eating that much food isn’t necessary and he should self fund if he insists on continuing. But if he has to actually spend his own money I bet he won’t!

Labels on things you don't want him to eat? Wraps for a meal, for example. Seem to remember my mum doing similar when me and my brother were teens 😅 You shouldn't have to, but as others have said, might make life a big easier.

My OH can also be a bit greedy with finishing things, and have on occasion resorted to hiding the odd thing away for myself 😶

Send HIM to the supermarket with a list. Let him lug it in and put it away. Most importantly, he can pay for it. Don’t buy him special high protein foods or cater to his diet in anyway. Make your list about your preferences and plan meals to suit yourself and your family. If you don’t have what you need to make the meal, he is paying for dinner for everyone.

Jesus Christ. " to suit yourself and your family ". HE IS OP'S FAMILY.

"Don't cater to his diet IN ANYWAY" Let alone high protein foods that might fill this poor bugger up. God who ARE you?
You're talking about OP's actual son.

Insist he replaces things like milk and bread, get him to ask about certain foods before using. That's just insisting on a certain level of cooperation and maturity.

But also stash a drawer with filling and easy things to eat as a poster has suggested. Teenage boys get hungry ! He can't help that! He shouldn't be punished for it.

I have teenage boys and it's similar. They have to take a bit of responsibility. Not eating meal ingredients. Replacing milk . Cooking up batches of filling food for lunches. Doing some meal prep for themselves etc.

Your son needs some rules and guidance OP.

Eating that much food isn’t necessary and he should self fund if he insists on continuing. But if he has to actually spend his own money I bet he won’t!

And how exactly do you know how much he needs to eat? 🙄

I thought I was proper weird for this but I take him shopping for his own food. He cooks his own meals anyway as he does sports but I'll tell him if things are off limits and it's got a lot better. Costs about 40 quid a week, that's not including lunches for school. Bit it's stopped him eating everything that's there.

Keep a shelf on a cupboard for his snacks!

We're really struggling with money right now so have to resort to hiding certain foods usually packed lunch bits and biscuits. Otherwise my son will find them and eat them. It wouldn't matter if I hadn't eaten for days and they'd had 3meals a day they'd take the last morsel.

I can totally see why you're mad and I would be too. We have a list on the fridge and I swear out of 7 of us only 2people actually write on it. You need to talk to him about how selfish he's being. He's not a kid anymore he needs to grow up abit!

This is your kid and you are posting about him eating too much.

I cannot ever imagine doing the same to my kids. He is your flesh and blood. Food is food. So what? The way the west treat their kids is embarrassing.

😂

Sorry we don't worship our sons like they are gods.

We have one fridge shelf and one cupboard shelf that is fair game. The rest is on the meal plan. I try and keep the fair game shelves stocked up. Boiled eggs are good. And nuts in shells slow the lads down a bit. Coconut and banana pancakes can go in the toaster. Flap jacks are cheap and filling.

I do insist on staples being replaced. Always have a spare milk, butter, carton of eggs but come down hard on anyone found finishing a pack and accessing the spare without notification or replacement. Proper fear of God stuff, which works so far.

I have 3 ds's, the youngest two are still around a lot at home. Ds2 is 22 eats everything in site ( sorry just warning it may not get better for a while !). he goes to the gym, always working out or walking, has a high protein diet, will cook another meal of eggs, bagels etc an hour after his main meal. DS3 is 20 and the opposite, barely eats, can go all day with nothing except a can of coke and then just eat one meal. Both about the same size.

I have a similar ds, although still at school. He knows he can have anything from the snack cupboard or fruit bowl, or make toast & jam/marmite.

But he has to ask about anything else. And he comes food shopping with me, so he knows what's involved in buying a week's food.

He can start temping, surely?

And also learn to cook dinner every nights, especially if he's not working??

Time to tell him to start doing his own food shop from now on or else start contributing to the food shop bill.

I’d insist he gets involved with shopping and cooking. He can do both a couple of times a week easily, especially as he’s not working at the moment.

Uni will probably help too. My son was always pretty good at telling us he’d used the last of something or picking stuff up at the shop, but he’s even more considerate since being at uni and having to shop and cook for himself all of the time.

So he's having a gap year to do nothing in particular and being almost entirely supported by you? Why?

She's not posting about him eating too much. She's posting about his lack of consideration for other people in the house who also need to eat. He's being very rude and inconsiderate. Or is that okay?

My mother would get upset if someone finished something so we all left a tiny bit of food in the package and put it back, no adding to the shopping list because there would be so much aggro, just saying. Agree he needs a job though.