Will you/did you request for your child to move out when they turn 18

[parateach]

Will you/did you request for your child to move out when they turn 18

And if not, will you request rent?

Thank you

So many factors to consider but I think I would be OK with my children living with me til mid 20s at a push, with a decent contribution to the household once they were earning. So it would be more of a lodger type of situation but with love in the mix! But honestly, I would be a bit sad for them if they were around any longer than that as I would perceive it as a kind of a failure to launch. I live in rural Ireland and while rents are indeed ridiculous like everywhere and accommodation difficult to find, it is not impossible if someone has the will to crack on with adult life either living alone or with othe😜rs who are not family. The other factor is behaviour - no bloody way would I want to be loving with someone, anyone if there wasn't respect, enjoyment, mutual support involved. I plan to be very much living life on my own terms by my late 50s so wouldn't be indulging anything that interfered significantly with that. So if I were to be away for work for a period, for example, I'd not want to be coming back to mess or things being let to run down. I am naturally quite introverted and like lots of time to myself and have always lived alone where I has the choice. So to me to have adult children living with me would need to work for me as its not something I'd be 'delighted' about unlike many on here.

No idea where that Good Morning emoji came from. Good Lord.

Are you the parent it or child ?
I'd expect rent if they were working full time , no one can live for free and it's extremely difficult now to live independently at 18.

No and No
Apart from anything else they will still be doing Alevels

I've made it clear there will be no 'gap year' of sitting in pants playing x box and either it's work or uni/apprenticeship etc.

I have told DC they need to be ready for self sufficiency by 18 eg cooking housework transporting themselves around .

I think I would rather help with rent payments than have them living here until 25! But we shall see.

No and no as both are studying.
Once they get full time work, and if they choose to live at home then I would ask for some rent.

Yes

That's awful, I don't blame you for never going back.

It depends what she’s doing. If she is a full time student then No I’d not charge any rent nor ask her to leave.

If she got a full time job I’d charge rent but not ask her to leave.

If she refused to get a job and wasn’t in full time education then eventually I’d chuck her out.

You need to give us more info OP, there are generalisations but also cases where they don't apply.

Are you the parent or the child? Are you talking now or a generation ago? What's the financial position of the household? Will the household finances change when the DC hits 18 that mean some contribution is needed?

They can live with me but they’ll absolutely be expected to contribute once they’re in f/t employment.

No, but it depends on everyone’s circumstances. We were poor when I was growing up, and I was the eldest of a large family living in a tiny house. When I left for university at 18 (scholarship with full maintenance) there was really no possibility of me living at home again — the space was needed, and my sister moved into my half of the room I shared with another sister. When I came back in the vacs, I was sleeping on the sofa. My parents had been taken out of school aged 12 and 13 by parents who needed their incomes, so it was natural to them that I would be self-reliant at 18.

If they are living at home while studying, but in receipt of the maintenance loan, it’s reasonable to ask for some rent. I don’t think you should charge rent if they are only home in the holidays, no.

No and yes if working

Lots of them are still at school at 18! (Here quite a few of the secondary schools have sixth form college attached).

I think I'd only charge rent after they finished university and were working full time, that's what my parents did with us (I never paid rent as after university I was doing lots of volunteering/work experience and only had a PT job, DBro paid rent for a year and then moved into a flat with a friend).

of course not
rent, depends if they are earning

Rent is the payment one makes to the owner of a property for the use of that property for a set period of time. For me, rent in the context of adult kids who work full time but live at home, is the exact opposite of that. I did not charge my adult kids rent as it was their family home too, but I made them financially neutral by charging them for the costs they generated by being there, ie food and share of water and power bills, This helped them plan and understand the real cost of living when they got their own place.

No.

I think rent/ board would really depend on finances. I'd like to see them with some savings but I'd probably need them to contribute to the food bill. So, probably rent but nothing like market rates.

It looks like a survey.

I was manipulated/pressured to leave. No officially word to say get out but more or less I was 16!

Ended up pregnant and given birth by 18 suprise suprise.

My nephew fell out with his parents he's 19....my mother can't do enough for him offering everything on a plate to him. Two faced bitch! I don't get it either.

If the student gets a full maintenance loan for living at home, yes I would consider charging some rent. Possibly figure out the difference between the loan for living out of home to home, and the average rent, and calculate between that.
So if a student on full maintenance loan outside the home would get 9.5k, rent is 4.5k, they are left with 5k.
Student living at home gets 8k (guess at the figure), so charging 3k will give them the same living amount as those peers.

If your child is at uni on a full maintenance loan, it's normally because the household income isn't great, and financing an adult not contributing to the house might not be easy.

No I will not ask them to move out. But when they leave education, they will have to contribute, as that is what adults do, and we couldn't afford to support someone who is capable of supporting themselves financially. We have already discussed it with our eldest who is 16, so it will not be a surprise, and agreed that 25% of their wages will be given. When she looked into how much it would cost to move out, she happily agreed to the 25%.

Yes. My dad tried to do this to me. I left and don't really speak to him years later.
I stand by it. It's my job to provide for my son until he's finished full time education. I wouldn't force him into debt. Student loan isn't a cheap loan. I spent years in crippling debt because of mine.

No and no

I don't know anyone who would request a kid moves out at 18 unless there's a back story of drugs/misbehaving/lack of respect. Strange question.

Perfectly acceptable for them to pay rent if they're working full time though.