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Original poster

Help my adult son is missing

297 replies

Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 21:47

My son is 23 and he has been missing since 11th September. I reported him missing the same day as it was out of character for him to miss work. He walked out of the house with nothing other than his bank card. His phone hasn't been turned on since the night he left.
So far I have:
Contacted all of his friends and contacts
Done a social media campaign
Battled with the police and filed two official complaints due to failures to investigate
Worked with missing people uk to do a media campaign
Handed out posters in the area that we have had one sighting. Unfortunately this is not our local area so it is difficult to go every day.

What else can I do? I've emailed and called every service I can find to share his photograph. Is there anything else anyone can suggest? I'm beyond devastated and will try anything at this point. Thank you for reading.

OP posts:
Zippedydoodahday · 23/09/2023 23:03

I would try reaching out to grassroots homeless outreaches in London like StreetAngelz and also places like Whitechapel Mission.

romdowa · 23/09/2023 23:03

Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:00

Thank you. I will go through his things again. He only uses his mobile phone and he took that with him (it's been off since) so it's entirely possible he was on sites that I don't know of. Is there any way of finding this out without his phone? I could order another SIM card as his mobile contract is in my name but I don't want to leave him without means of getting in touch

Show quote history

That kind of info isn't on the sim, it's on the phone. Does he have a tablet or something that would be signed in with the same Google/ icloud account as his phone?

Silkiebunny · 23/09/2023 23:04

https://www.facebook.com/caidyn.tait.3 Is this him, there's about 3 similar ones though all appear about 10 years old and only use maybe friends are visible.

oakleaffy · 23/09/2023 23:04

Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 22:21

Here is my beautiful son. We are in Kent but he was seen in Luton last week. We have no connections to that area at all.

I sincerely hope your son is found safe and well

A woman I know’s son did this, and everyone was naturally very worried.
Police did share his image and description.

He was found safe and well having been living rough on some local playing fields.

Fingers crossed for you and your lovely son 🙏

Blackandwhitemakesgrey · 23/09/2023 23:07

frazzled22 · 23/09/2023 22:50

And this could tie in with the diversity of Luton culture possibly.

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What does this mean?
Is it he might be involved in a terrorist or vigilante group?

OddlyFramed · 23/09/2023 23:07

Nothing to add but I just wanted to comment to bump this as my only way to help.

thescab · 23/09/2023 23:07

No better advice than what has been given already, but hoping you get some good news asap OP Flowers

Tremblingmadness · 23/09/2023 23:08

Does he have access to money, as in a source of Income?

If not do you have his bank account details and are you able to pay money into his bank account to ensure he can access money for food, transport, accommodation if he is desperate.

Obviously you don’t know why he has left, but having access to money may prevent him getting into more difficulties sleeping rough etc.

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 23/09/2023 23:08

If his mobile contract is in your name, could you access the account, you know like a breakdown of calls, texts etc? I know you said his phone has been off for a while but has he maybe been keeping it off and just switching it on when he needs to use it then putting it straight back off again? If so, you may be able to find out if and where he's been contacting.

SirVixofVixHall · 23/09/2023 23:08

Op if this brings any comfort, my DH is often involved in searches for missing people, and one young lad a similar age to your boy went missing, history of depression, all really worrying. DH was out all night searching but he wasn’t found. It all looked pretty hopeless, but he suddenly returned home two weeks later. He had taken himself off somewhere else, wondered around etc.
I had posted about it on Twitter, DH and I were losing sleep thinking of him, it was such a relief .
I hope your son is found soon, my heart is going out to you.

JimnJoyce · 23/09/2023 23:08

I can see from google that the story looks to have been picked up by quite a few local papers Op, I really hope it helps.

Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:12

romdowa · 23/09/2023 23:03

That kind of info isn't on the sim, it's on the phone. Does he have a tablet or something that would be signed in with the same Google/ icloud account as his phone?

Show quote history

No tablet or PC. He's very much addicted to his mobile phone. It was a source of tension sometimes but I'd give anything to see him staring at a screen again.

OP posts:
Barnowlsandbluebells · 23/09/2023 23:12

frazzled22 · 23/09/2023 22:48

Whereabouts in Luton was he seen? The town centre? I'm not far from Luton so could share on local FB groups etc if you want me to?

Do you think it might be possible to get kind local people to help with putting up posters / searching etc?

Rainallnight · 23/09/2023 23:12

OP, I’m so sorry. This sounds like a living nightmare.

You mentioned that your names have changed. Could there be an ex-DH in the background playing a part in this? Sorry if that’s reaching, just trying to think of different angles.

DeeCee77 · 23/09/2023 23:12

Sorry you are going through this OP. Hopefully he gets back to you very soon.

Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:13

Silkiebunny · 23/09/2023 23:04

https://www.facebook.com/caidyn.tait.3 Is this him, there's about 3 similar ones though all appear about 10 years old and only use maybe friends are visible.

Yes that's an old account from when he was at school that he no longer uses.

The link to the current FB appeal is https://www.facebook.com/help.find.caidyn.tait

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/help.find.caidyn.tait

OP posts:
Barnowlsandbluebells · 23/09/2023 23:16

OP, does Caidyn have links with any particular places so we can share details there for you to help spread the word?

Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:17

Tremblingmadness · 23/09/2023 23:08

Does he have access to money, as in a source of Income?

If not do you have his bank account details and are you able to pay money into his bank account to ensure he can access money for food, transport, accommodation if he is desperate.

Obviously you don’t know why he has left, but having access to money may prevent him getting into more difficulties sleeping rough etc.

He gets paid weekly so he did receive wages on the first Friday he was missing as he's paid a week in hand. I don't think he will be getting any further wages as he doesn't get paid if he doesn't go in. Both my partner and I are putting money in on a regular basis. I put my mobile number as a reference. I know he can't really see that unless he gets a statement but it's the only way I can get a message to him at the moment.

OP posts:
whynotwhatknot · 23/09/2023 23:17

have u looked at the phone account to try and get an itemised list of anyone hes called or text

its under your name doesnt matter if its his phone

Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:20

Rainallnight · 23/09/2023 23:12

OP, I’m so sorry. This sounds like a living nightmare.

You mentioned that your names have changed. Could there be an ex-DH in the background playing a part in this? Sorry if that’s reaching, just trying to think of different angles.

I don't think so. He hasn't had a very good relationship with his dad but I don't really get involved in that unless my son wants to talk about it. I haven't had contact with his dad for several years and I haven't let him know the situation as I think my son would be angry with me if I did. Maybe I need to rethink this.

OP posts:
SpringViolet · 23/09/2023 23:21

If his mobile contract is in your name, have you tried going through the bill (online) and calling all the numbers he’s rung recently? Do they still list the numbers rung on the bill these days, never look at ours?

Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:23

Barnowlsandbluebells · 23/09/2023 23:16

OP, does Caidyn have links with any particular places so we can share details there for you to help spread the word?

We live in Medway now and he has family in Essex. His dad lives up north. Other than that, I can't think of any other connections. He is a home boy really. He goes out to work and the local pub but he's not one to travel around really.

OP posts:
Original poster
Aliceinunderland · 23/09/2023 23:25

whynotwhatknot · 23/09/2023 23:17

have u looked at the phone account to try and get an itemised list of anyone hes called or text

its under your name doesnt matter if its his phone

Yes luckily because the contract is in my name, I was able to access the numbers he has been contacting so I was able to find his friends who have all been very good at trying to find him too.

OP posts:
Barnowlsandbluebells · 23/09/2023 23:26

@Aliceinunderland Thank you - if anywhere else springs to mind, please do post on here. Does he drive and if so, does he have his driving license with him?

Rainallnight · 23/09/2023 23:28

I’ll be thinking of you, OP. I’m so sorry you’re going through this