Help my adult son is missing

[Aliceinunderland]

My son is 23 and he has been missing since 11th September. I reported him missing the same day as it was out of character for him to miss work. He walked out of the house with nothing other than his bank card. His phone hasn't been turned on since the night he left.
So far I have:
Contacted all of his friends and contacts
Done a social media campaign
Battled with the police and filed two official complaints due to failures to investigate
Worked with missing people uk to do a media campaign
Handed out posters in the area that we have had one sighting. Unfortunately this is not our local area so it is difficult to go every day.

What else can I do? I've emailed and called every service I can find to share his photograph. Is there anything else anyone can suggest? I'm beyond devastated and will try anything at this point. Thank you for reading.

I'm so sorry you're going through this OP. I actually saw your FB post tonight (before I saw this thread) as one of my FB friends had shared it. So word IS travelling!

One extra idea for you - upload your poster to FB groups and ask if people would be willing to print it themselves and display it in local shops/church noticeboards etc....wherever he's been spotted.

I hope he's home soon!

Another thing that sprung to mind. You said he went to the local pub. Do you know who with? Have you spoken to the landlord? Pub landlords know a lot about their customers often without them even realising. If there has been any involvement in drugs then the landlord may well be aware, they often know who the local dealers are, they know which regulars speak to which, they sometimes even have to ban people who they suspect of dealing on site. The landlord may know if your son has been seen with anyone like this or if they move in the same circles etc.

If he is a home boy then the people in your local area likely have a lot of relevant information. I would try to think more creatively about who else you could speak to that may have info.

as he was seen in Luton-might it be worth reporting missing\all info to that area division.Its appalling that police have opted to not act appropriately. i hope you have him safe in arms soon x

So sorry this is happening, OP. I don’t know if this is an affordable option, sorry, but could you consider a Private Investigator in your area?

Perhaps it might help to go to his last known location and Luton, book a hotel for a few days, do what an investigator might do. While you are there, physically go into the police station and ask to be interviewed. Ask around local homeless teams, outreach teams, charities. Walk the area.

It says on FB site he may have been spotted at Luton and Dunstable hospital and before was at garage in early hours of morning. If it's possible I would drive round the area he is last seen in in early hours of morning and maybe try A&E at the hospital. It might be worth getting the hospital warned he is a missing person, may flag automatically. I would also think about how he could have travelled to Luton, would trains have been running at that hour, would doubt it, which raises question did he get a lift, hitch hike, any CCTV for that. Agree with asking at pub. I wouldn't directly mention drugs just say for any info. See if they will put poster up but give another contact method than police incase it is drugs or someone doesn't trust police.

Which part of the north does his dad live in OP?

I'm so sorry you're going through this - my kids are in their 20s, I swear you worry more the older they get! I hope he comes home soon

at a similar age my dd went missing in LA (usa) and never showed up to a friends bridal shower.
the police were excellent and gave me a full list of all hospitals/morgues and jails for me to call and ask about any "jane doe's"(a person with no id).
they were not easy calls but i did it, she was found relatively quickly.
positive thoughts and prayers for your son to be found soon.

There is a taxi driver on TikTok called MrLuton. He seems to be live most of the time and helps a lot of homeless people in Milton Keynes and Luton. Perhaps getting in touch with him might enable him to keep a look out for your son?

You might not be able to access it but if he has a google account and you can log into that, you may be able to see his search history which may well give you a clue to where he is. Depends if you know the passwords he’s likely to have used.

Praying you get some news soon xxx

Have you tried talking to Midshires Search and Rescue? Not sure if they need to be tasked by the police but they might have some advice on getting the word out locally?

I am so sorry you are going through this. I echo what other posters gave said about going to Luton yourself. Take someone supportive with you. As well as the pub it may be worth checking in at hostels/shelters to find out where he has potentially been staying. I sincerely hope you are back with your son soon x

Could you put a paid advert in the Luton local paper with his picture, or even ask the if they'll do an article about him?

I used to volunteer with a missing children's investigative team and it was entirely made up of private investigators. They are more skilled and dedicated than police. This would be my first avenue, after proper reporting to police of course. I do hope you find him soon 💗

One thing that might be of use is you could contact your local MP and make an appointment to see them and say you need urgent help to galvanise the police and the publicity profile. If you've got a sympathetic and competent MP (some of them are) they could get this happening by some route or other. It's just another avenue to pursue.
I'm so sorry OP you must be completely distraught, I hope he turns up safe and well ASAP, I'm glad you posted for Mumsnetters to give you support and ideas.
Wishing you and all your family and your boy well.

Has he taken a driver's licence etc so could have flown to somewhere else in the UK? I think you need ID but not a passport.
I hope you find him.

He can see that if he uses the banking app.

You must be beside yourself OP. I hope you find him soon.

I'm so sorry you are going through this. My son is the same age, and this would be my worst nightmare.
I hope you get some positive answers very soon x

I hope your ds is found safe and well soon. I hope he just needed a bit of time out and will be in contact with you really soon. Sending loving thoughts.

I hope he's found soon OP. This must be torture for you.

Thinking of you OP too. Could you contact the local news in Luton if has been seen there. Cant imagine what you are going through.

I hope you get some good news soon OP.

You mentioned that he’s addicted to his phone, but doesn’t use social media much. Do you know what he does on his phone? Can you talk to his friends to find out what he’s been up to recently, had he said anything to them that was a bit out of character? Reassure them that you won’t be upset or angry about anything they say, they don’t need to protect him.

I would talk to his dad. I’m estranged from mine and haven’t spoken in years, but when I’m struggling mentally it’s tempting to reach out to him. He could have done so without you knowing, or since he’s left.

Not that it’s any help but I’m iN Kent and have seen the shared posts and Kent live/police appeal post so you’re definitely getting his face out there