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Original poster

Tell me you're a parent without telling me you're a parent

252 replies

Peachpicklepie · 15/09/2023 11:52

I'll go first. I've just put a piece of half eaten peanut butter toast on the roof of my car and driven off.
Your turn.

OP posts:
D3LAN3Y · 15/09/2023 13:40

SomersetBrie · 15/09/2023 13:06

I quite often ask my work colleagues if they "need a wee" before we head to a meeting.

I do this 🙈

fancyfrogs · 15/09/2023 13:41

I spent too long this morning trying to explain why we can't really eat quavers at 6:30am. More specifically, the 'yellow crips'

TheWayTheLightFalls · 15/09/2023 13:42

I'm overinvested in Ms Rachel's relationship with her husband.

whoknows2 · 15/09/2023 13:43

I'll cut up my own grapes before remembering I'm a big girl.

fiddlesticksandotherwords · 15/09/2023 13:46

There's a wooden crocodile next to my television.

D3LAN3Y · 15/09/2023 13:46

fiddlesticksandotherwords · 15/09/2023 13:46

There's a wooden crocodile next to my television.

That actually sounds amazing

Cheesymonster · 15/09/2023 13:49

When In a queue I rock gently from side to side even though I haven’t had a baby on my hip for ten years.

When preparing to leave somewhere, I ask the people I’m with if they’ve had a wee - whether it’s my child, my husband, a work colleague…

I love cheese strings.

PangramAddict · 15/09/2023 13:51

I never go anywhere without snacks and once pulled a full packet of Oreos out of my handbag to the utter bafflement of child free colleagues.

Thecomfortador · 15/09/2023 13:52

I find myself missing Cars and Cars 3 when Preston playz is echoing around the upper wing of the house.

Silkiebunny · 15/09/2023 13:58

There's a soft toy dodo in my living room.

SomethingNastyInTheBallPool · 15/09/2023 14:00

I would love a soft toy dodo.

I am not allowed to sing in my
own house.

TheGirlWhoLived · 15/09/2023 14:02

Oh we have indoor rocks. Practically an indoor rock formation tbh. Plus various rocks and sticks taking up various parts of the hours

80sMum · 15/09/2023 14:04

peachypudding · 15/09/2023 12:14

I haven't had a day free from worry in 34 years.

Yes, this - except for me it's now 44 years!

Hipp0campus · 15/09/2023 14:05

I have willingly caught someone elses vomit with my bare hands. More than once.

IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos · 15/09/2023 14:05

fancyfrogs · 15/09/2023 13:41

I spent too long this morning trying to explain why we can't really eat quavers at 6:30am. More specifically, the 'yellow crips'

I spent a lot of time the other morning explaining that:

  1. When you ask for porridge with strawberries for breakfast, you can't be surprised that it's not chocolate in your bowl
  2. You can't have chocolate buttons for breakfast and you can throw yourself on the floor as much as you like but it doesn't change the fact that chocolate buttons are not breakfast

I was very glad to do the nursery drop off that morning and go to work where I don't care what anyone has for breakfast!

Fixesplease · 15/09/2023 14:07

I served up dinner to visiting members of the family and I'd automatically cut all the things into bite size chunks..spoiler.. none are under 40!

Pinkchicken85 · 15/09/2023 14:07

My new go to shampoo is now of the anti-nit treatment variety. My hair is so dry it looks like a unruly mound of hay.

and yesterday I found poo on my floor… with my foot.

duringthewarrodney · 15/09/2023 14:08

Can Grandparents join in?

GS (6) and GD (4) had a sleepover with us on the second day of term last week and complained to his Mum when he got home that his feet hurt. Upon checking, she said "Yes Rodney, I'm not surprised - you've got your sister's shoes on"

Whoops.......(in my defence, they looked very similar!)

DapperDame · 15/09/2023 14:08

I have to book a slot for me to drive somewhere in my own car

Faz469 · 15/09/2023 14:09

spitefulandbadgrammar · 15/09/2023 12:31

My house is filled with special sticks. And special gravel. And special leaves.

To be fair so is mine but that's due to the dog

Phos · 15/09/2023 14:10

Whenever we find ourselves stuck at temporary traffic lights we blame it on Mr Bull.

DifficultBloodyWoman · 15/09/2023 14:12

I don’t have to ‘tell’ you. Just look at me - leggings, oversized t-shirt with milk and snot stains, my hair in a scrunchie and no make up.

I NEVER thought I would EVER leave the house looking like this!

IpsyUpsyDaisyDoos · 15/09/2023 14:12

Phos · 15/09/2023 14:10

Whenever we find ourselves stuck at temporary traffic lights we blame it on Mr Bull.

I need more context! Can I also blame Mr Bull?

Torontonoob · 15/09/2023 14:13

Stop playing with it

CarolDunne · 15/09/2023 14:13

I am having the time of my life in arrivals waiting on a 3 hour delayed flight

BY MYSELF