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Original poster

Tell me you're a parent without telling me you're a parent

252 replies

Peachpicklepie · 15/09/2023 11:52

I'll go first. I've just put a piece of half eaten peanut butter toast on the roof of my car and driven off.
Your turn.

OP posts:
AliceTheCamelHasFiveHumps · 15/09/2023 11:52

There's a small plastic dinosaur in my handbag

saltrocking · 15/09/2023 11:56

I'm skint and tired lol

Kucinghitam · 15/09/2023 12:00

Makka pakka akka wakka mikka makka moo! Makka pakka appa yakka ikka akka oo!

Warmhandscoldheart · 15/09/2023 12:02

I'm the filling of a generational sandwich 🙂

TooBigForMyBoots · 15/09/2023 12:03

saltrocking · 15/09/2023 11:56

I'm skint and tired lol

This, and I haven't bought myself any new underwear in years.

AnotherVice · 15/09/2023 12:06

There are 9 grasshoppers living in an old butterfly container in my kitchen.

Harrriet · 15/09/2023 12:11

The first thing I said this morning was....
Get your willy off the table

StoneWitch · 15/09/2023 12:12

Harrriet · 15/09/2023 12:11

The first thing I said this morning was....
Get your willy off the table

😆

CordeliaNaismithVorkosigan · 15/09/2023 12:13

I always have wet wipes and plasters in my handbag.

peachypudding · 15/09/2023 12:14

I haven't had a day free from worry in 34 years.

cuckyplunt · 15/09/2023 12:15

I love a business trip with a stay in a hotel.

HalebiHabibti · 15/09/2023 12:15

Get those pants off the living room floor

Who left this empty packet here

<everlasting shrieks of Youtubers echoing in my ears>

DameWhiskers · 15/09/2023 12:16

I stock food in my pantry that I don't eat.

Original poster
Peachpicklepie · 15/09/2023 12:17

Harrriet · 15/09/2023 12:11

The first thing I said this morning was....
Get your willy off the table

This is brilliant 😂

OP posts:
Whattodo112222 · 15/09/2023 12:17

AliceTheCamelHasFiveHumps · 15/09/2023 11:52

There's a small plastic dinosaur in my handbag

Mine too! I pulled my purse out and her frozen fork and peppa pig keys fell out my bag too

UpUpUpU · 15/09/2023 12:19

I have snot all over my back

Whereland · 15/09/2023 12:19

I was driving this morning and said "oh look! A crane!" Before remembering I was alone in the car

MrsPatrickDempsey · 15/09/2023 12:21

The scars on my perineum.

Bobbyelvis4ever · 15/09/2023 12:22

I'm really good at catching sick in my hands

Sosbanfachtheresatellyinmybath · 15/09/2023 12:24

Whereland · 15/09/2023 12:19

I was driving this morning and said "oh look! A crane!" Before remembering I was alone in the car

I usually shout 'tractor'!
I done it one day and the farmer was laughing at me because I was on my own 🤣

fandjango · 15/09/2023 12:26

Got in to bed and rolled over on to three trains, a half eaten biscuit and a tractor 🚜

Badlands1 · 15/09/2023 12:27

My specialist subject on Mastermind would be Disney films circa 2000- 2008

BinkyBeaufort · 15/09/2023 12:29

I always have tissues in my pocket

Fleur405 · 15/09/2023 12:30

My housemate demanded a banana for breakfast this morning then looked me in the eye, smooshed the banana in her hands and threw the banana smoosh on the floor.

holachicatita · 15/09/2023 12:30

Currently hiding in the utility room eating a bar of chocolate cos I don't want to share with my toddler